When a woman rejects someone

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CollegeGirlAnon
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10 Jan 2021, 8:03 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
It hurts to be rejected.

I've been rejected many times. It hurts......BAD! I've been in despair because of rejection. I've even felt like killing myself a couple of times.

But you have to move on from the rejection. You can't let it affect how you live your life.

There is more to life than just romance.

I've been there too. It can be hard to remember that there is more to life than romance but there is.


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13 Jan 2021, 6:54 am

KT67 wrote:
Every guy I've been with has used some kind of (usually subtle/'romantic' like holding me over train tracks in a 'romantic' way or pushing up against me etc) physical force before I got into the relationship with him, to show dominance & show 'this is what happens when people say no to me' and have then gone onto isolate me from people I trust.

Yuck! I'm very sorry to hear this!

Alas I suspect this is common, at least in mainstream Western culture, although I don't know for sure.

Fortunately I've managed to avoid men like this, for the most part, thanks to the offbeat subcultures I've participated in off-and-on over the years, in which there were strong social pressures against doing anything nonconsensual.


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13 Jan 2021, 8:38 am

It all comes down to this disgusting little NT game where guys are supposed to have sex with as many different women as possible. If you approach love from the infatuation & obsession perspective, you will never ask a woman for sex just because you have some vague idea she might consent, or because she might feel pressured to agree. So, it all comes down to pursuing sex rather than love & romance. If you really are into a woman you will not risk spoiling it all by asking her for a date or for casual sex.



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13 Jan 2021, 9:20 am

It all comes down to women choosing whom they will date, and the men they reject learning to deal with it.


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cberg
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13 Jan 2021, 9:29 am

This thread has taken a turn towards patronizing sexism...


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13 Jan 2021, 9:31 am

cberg wrote:
This thread has taken a turn towards patronizing sexism...
Is that any worse than taking a turn toward abject misogyny?


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13 Jan 2021, 9:33 am

What makes you think those things are any different?

Stop condescending, it's not constructive.


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13 Jan 2021, 9:35 am

cberg wrote:
What makes you think those things are any different?  Stop condescending, it's not constructive.
Tell me ... why do people who know that are wrong always seem to be the first to accuse others of "condescension"?


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13 Jan 2021, 9:38 am

All I see here anymore is a broken record zeitgeist regarding AS making dudes seem worthless to most of you.

It's boring, predictable, stifling & played out. You have no respect & it's a bad look.


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13 Jan 2021, 9:38 am

Fnord wrote:
It all comes down to women choosing whom they will date, and the men they reject learning to deal with it.


I suppose that's easy for somebody that already is in an LTR to say. I'd bet you'd have a different opinion if you were single and 25. :mrgreen:

And my opinion in the matter is that if you as a male don't want to deal with repeated rejection then you simply avoid seeking casual sex and only involve in serious stuff in the relationship area. That's always how I've acted, and I don't think I ever got rejected by a woman.



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13 Jan 2021, 9:40 am

I wholeheartedly reject this line of thinking.


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13 Jan 2021, 9:41 am

rdos wrote:
Fnord wrote:
It all comes down to women choosing whom they will date, and the men they reject learning to deal with it.
I suppose that's easy for somebody that already is in an LTR to say. I'd bet you'd have a different opinion if you were single and 25.  And my opinion in the matter is that if you as a male don't want to deal with repeated rejection then you simply avoid seeking casual sex and only involve in serious stuff in the relationship area.  That's always how I've acted, and I don't think I ever got rejected by a woman.
Then our discussion is moot.


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rdos
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13 Jan 2021, 9:42 am

Fnord wrote:
cberg wrote:
This thread has taken a turn towards patronizing sexism...
Is that any worse than taking a turn toward abject misogyny?


I don't think disliking rejection has anything to do with misogyny. It's more about understanding your true preferences and stop trying to do it the "expected way".



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13 Jan 2021, 9:44 am

Your animosity is moot, our discussion is about real sexist tropes & not your forcing us to deal with anything.

Being an as*hole to single dudes is pretty much the definition of sexist feminism.


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13 Jan 2021, 9:45 am

Fnord wrote:
rdos wrote:
Fnord wrote:
It all comes down to women choosing whom they will date, and the men they reject learning to deal with it.
I suppose that's easy for somebody that already is in an LTR to say. I'd bet you'd have a different opinion if you were single and 25.  And my opinion in the matter is that if you as a male don't want to deal with repeated rejection then you simply avoid seeking casual sex and only involve in serious stuff in the relationship area.  That's always how I've acted, and I don't think I ever got rejected by a woman.
Then our discussion is moot.


How come? Does my opinion about rejection become less relevant because I didn't suffer from repeated rejection since I did it in a better way than those that did?



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13 Jan 2021, 9:46 am

rdos wrote:
Fnord wrote:
cberg wrote:
This thread has taken a turn towards patronizing sexism...
Is that any worse than taking a turn toward abject misogyny?
I don't think disliking rejection has anything to do with misogyny. It's more about understanding your true preferences and stop trying to do it the "expected way".
Point taken.  My objections are toward the sweeping sexist generalizations against all women and the NT-bashing by some members here.


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