Guys or Gals: would you date a BBW?

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I'm a sucker for sluttiness, lol. If I have ever used it as an insult, I haven't ever meant it.

I completely agree - women should be able to dress exactly how they like.

It is dangerous to dress like that in public! There are men who will sexually assault people etc. It is a risk you have to take if you want to assert your femininity, unfortunately.

Unless you're an activist for such matters or something and you are already an expert, I advise that you should check your area code for crime rates and avoid places where creepy men might touch you without consent and just roll with the punches.

Last edited by blitzkrieg on 22 Nov 2021, 6:31 am, edited 1 time in total.

Always walk in brightly lit places, with company, and preferably in places or areas that you know.

Because you have beautiful puppy dog eyes?

Enough talk.
Selfies. <joke>



"Look but don't touch."

Aren't we at a stage where most guys know that when most women dress like that, they are not looking for sex, but just looking to look good or show off? I mean if a woman dresses, shall we say, provacative, I think most guys try to get a date with her but fail, and therefore, most guys nowadays would see that she is not dressed like that for that?

That's why a lot of men wish they grew up in the 1960s free love era. That window shut for business around the time Jimmy hendrix, Janis Joplin and Jim Morrison all died.

Was the free love era really more promiscuous than today though? It seems that today is the most promiscuous you can get, especially with polyamorous relationships being more accepted today. Unless I am wrong?

You'd hope so.

It's different. In 2021 alpha males have their pick of female sex partners. Average men struggle to find an average looking partner.

In 1968 attractive women happily slept with average men.

Having lived through those decades, I am inclined to dispute that assertion.

As I recall, the "sexual revolution" began in the 60s but at first it was mostly media hype. However the "sex positive" message promoted by those media affected the attitudes of Baby Boomers who, when they were old enough to be on their own, had a historically low threshold for choosing to have sex (of some sort, not necessarily PIV intercourse) with another person. Some of that had to do with rejection of a "double standard" that stigmatized female activity more than male. Young women who, a generation earlier would have declined a sexual encounter with a man to whom they were attracted, no longer had that inhibition. Furthermore, Baby Boomers, at least when they were young, were unusually secular in their outlook and quick to reject the mores of their parents' generation. The other big change was availability of birth control pills. It was very common for young women to take them regularly even when not in an established relationship. It was considered sensible to always be "prepared". This phenomenon peaked much more in the 70s than in the 60s.

However, the women in question were for the most part below average in looks and "above". Many were attractive only because they were young. "slu*ty" wardrobe choices were actually very out of fashion, in fact the women who wore no makeup and possibly didn't even shave seemed to be the most approachable.

After the 70s, the pendulum swung the other way, for there was an awareness of STDs plus Generation X was far less rebellious and more influenced by traditional religion. In the ensuing decades, slut-shaming returned, inspired both by traditional "values" plus certain trends in feminism that led to women being more likely to see certain sexual situations as degrading. The Internet played a major unanticipated role as well. I believe the Internet is mostly to blame* for the decline of topless sunbathing on public beaches. Even if not intended as sexual, public exposure of breasts sort of sends a message of sexual openness and the insistence on staying covered does the opposite.

Suffice it to say that sexuality has become extremely complicated compared to what it was in the 70s. As for these "attractive women" having their pick of alpha males to choose for sex partners, what I see happening is a very small percentage of younger women who indulge in recreational sex with multiple men, and probably only do so for a brief period in their lives, make themselves available via apps like Tinder and of course they have a lot to choose from. If we had a way for everybody in society who wants to be in a relationship to meet a like minded person and join up with them, the situation would appear very different, because if everybody were truly monogamous there would be just one man for each woman and vice versa (disregarding the tendency of some cultures to have an artificially high male-to-female ratio).

*immigration is probably the other big factor.

But if average women are not willing to go for average men now, do average women think they have a chance with the alpha males, when competition is stiff?

To generalize, I would say the average woman in her 30s is not especially attractive according to most peoples' standards. However if she makes herself available for purely recreational sex, she won't be rejected by "alpha" males who are quite happy to have sex with a different woman every day (in theory at least). That being the case, why should she bother having sex with balding white guys with dad bods or low-income* Indian guys?

OTOH if the same woman decides she wants to marry or even have a long-term committed relationship with some super-hot 10 years younger dude, she may have a real struggle.

Another issue of course is that single men say they'll hook up with an "average" woman but when presented with a selection of "chronically" dateless women, whose looks might represent the average, at least statistically, will reject them on the grounds that they couldn't form sexual thoughts about those women. Consider for example, when the show Girls first came on HBO, how many men publicly complained about being expected to see Lena Dunham nude on screen whereas in the real world she was arguably above average in attractiveness at the time (sadly she has since developed health problems that have affected her looks).

*"income" wasn't the word I really wanted to use here.

Oh okay, but men will reject certain types of women, because they cannot form thoughts about them sexually, couldn't the non-alpha swoop in and go for these women then, if the alphas are rejecting them?

Poll doesn't have an appropriate choice for me. I prefer neither one size or the other, and I don't require a larger partner to slim down.

I care that they maintain their health well for their sake, and that their fitness level or eating habits don't prevent me from enjoying my life or maintaining good health. I will admit, though, that gratuitous overeating or hypocritical habits are severely unattractive to me and difficult to relate to.

Some do, especially immigrants (which I say at the risk of stereotyping). Also some men on the spectrum seem less likely to care about conventional "good looks" than NT men. I see some men posting here who have have some dating/sexual experience and it's my impression that they've dated women who aren't usually thought of as attractive.

But then you have a large number of men who have a hard time having "romantic" thoughts about any woman who doesn't meet a certain "standard", and so they stay single. Also, it's amazing just how lacking in any sort of "sex appeal" many men are.

Oh okay I see. Well I posted a thread a few months ago, about how I was having problems being sexually aroused by my gf because she was too goodlooking. This seems odd because how can I not be aroused by a really goodlooking woman.

But in the past I have always been hooking up average looking or obese woman for years, so I find myself naturally more attracted to that because it's what I am use to. It's hard for me to fantasize about a goodlooking woman, because I am so use to the former and get aroused by that much more naturally usually.

So is it possible for other guys to do the same and just go for average and obese women, over and over again to the point where they are conditioned to them and therefore will respond arousingly to them because that is what they have become use to overtime? And therefore that's a good thing, because they can now be aroused by women who will likely go for them much more?