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How long did it take you to move on?

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How long did it take you to move on from a crush or breakup?
0-2 years 43%  43%  [ 10 ]
2-5 years 17%  17%  [ 4 ]
5-10 years 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
More than 10 years 39%  39%  [ 9 ]
Total votes : 23

Jakki
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28 Dec 2021, 11:10 pm

People emulate ,what they see the most of…. It is incredibly sad how people see things in media and believe it is how real life is . Entire parts of the population, even up into government offices seem to believe that is how things are in real life , and even make decisions,that affect big parts of the population . Based on media reality. It’s like they wish to program . The population with fabricated media influence.


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blitzkrieg
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29 Dec 2021, 8:04 am

Mona Pereth wrote:
Substantially_Abstract wrote:
I guess, some people are more comfortable than others with staying friends after breaking up... Like, it does take a certain amount of strength for both sides to 1. Tell each other what exactly was not working out, and acknowledge that, and 2. Battle their leftover feelings, and accept the new status of their ex being a friend.

Personally I've almost always remained friends with exes.

Also, most of my breakups have been mutual -- not one person "dumping" the other, but a mutual recognition of incompatibilities.

Also, when I've gotten into a romantic relationship with someone, one of the things I've wanted to know about the person, from the beginning of the relationship, is whether they are the kind of person who tends to remain friends with exes. In my case, I specifically wanted my partner to be the kind of person who can remain friends with exes. That way, I could rest secure in the knowledge that, even if we turn out not to be compatible enough for a lasting intimate relationship, we can still be part of each other's support network, and thus the effort we have put into the relationship will not be totally in vain.


I kind of feel the same. If I don't know what my exes are up to it makes me curious and wanting to know more than if I actually knew?



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29 Dec 2021, 12:52 pm

I don't think i am able to move on if i actually love someone.



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29 Dec 2021, 4:00 pm

I easily understand about the above post . And can agree with it .


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29 Dec 2021, 4:08 pm

I also agree, my exes are in the agape sector of my love. They are unworthy but I do love them. It takes time to get there.



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29 Dec 2021, 6:53 pm

I personally find love to be something that is measured by proportions. If you truly love or have loved someone, they will always have a piece of your heart. :heart:

It can diminish over time in intensity (to the point of irrelevancy), or increase in the absence of a loved one, or stay a level course.

It depends on the individual and how they deal with the emotional 'space' in their minds.



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29 Dec 2021, 10:20 pm

My first gf left me about three and a half years ago and I still think about it every day honestly.



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30 Dec 2021, 8:50 am

Both my exes were my best friends but it's much better for me & both of them for us to not be in contact & for me to have no clue what's going on in their lives. I'm very protective of romantic partners & I was highly unstable in both relationships partly due to BAD anxiety & BAD OCD. My anxiety & OCD & mental stability are alot better nowadays partly due to meds but it would still majorly hurt me to know about something really bad that's going on with em & me knowing that I could not do a d@mn thing to help. If something very bad were to happen with my current girlfriend rite now, at least I could do something; I could be there for her & offer her emotional support or a hug or something. Watching from the sidelines of something very bad happen with somebody I majorly love could push me over the edge & make me snap.


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30 Dec 2021, 9:58 am

Jakki wrote:
People emulate, what they see the most of… It is incredibly sad how people see things in media and believe it is how real life is. Entire parts of the population, even up into government offices seem to believe that is how things are in real life, and even make decisions that affect big parts of the population. Based on media reality. It's like they wish to program. The population with fabricated media influence.
How does any of this relate to the thread subject?



Jakki
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30 Dec 2021, 11:22 am

it was an extension of what the post above it was about . And how people use their experiences with media , based on non reality . to form how they should interact in their real life relationships.
this includes how they deal with their past relationships . It was a critique of how media forms decisions for individuals and this includes relationship all the way up the the societal chain of events . The idea that media can and has dictated how a person engages or stops engaging a relationship felt offensive to me . On the part of people controlling the media .


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Fnord
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30 Dec 2021, 11:26 am

Jakki wrote:
it was an extension of what the post above it was about. And how people use their experiences with media , based on non reality. to form how they should interact in their real life relationships. This includes how they deal with their past relationships. It was a critique of how media forms decisions for individuals and this includes relationship all the way up the the societal chain of events. The idea that media can and has dictated how a person engages or stops engaging a relationship felt offensive to me. On the part of people controlling the media.
Does not parse, even after correcting the punctuation and spelling errors.



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30 Dec 2021, 12:05 pm

Fnord wrote:
Jakki wrote:
it was an extension of what the post above it was about. And how people use their experiences with media , based on non reality. to form how they should interact in their real life relationships. This includes how they deal with their past relationships. It was a critique of how media forms decisions for individuals and this includes relationship all the way up the the societal chain of events. The idea that media can and has dictated how a person engages or stops engaging a relationship felt offensive to me. On the part of people controlling the media.
Does not parse, even after correcting the punctuation and spelling errors.


Apologies for your lack of ability to get the concepts , that was being made does not offend me.
If you were using the keyboard ,i am forced to use due to the limitations of this old tablet .
That am having to use . One might make allowances for punctuation errors . But if your critisim
has become such that you seek punctuation errors . Then i am getting a better idea of why my posts might confuse you . My intention inspite of this old tablets limitations was merely to get a concept across . i hope this clarifys some of what you seem to focus on .


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Fnord
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30 Dec 2021, 5:43 pm

↑ Your "apology" lacks sincerity.  Never apologize for others' actions, feelings, or thoughts; but only for your own.

I too am using a tablet.