Attitude toward caucasian men with non-caucasian women

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1986
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15 Feb 2022, 8:19 pm

I think there's also a big difference between merely dating or having sex and progressing to marriage and maintaining that marriage. I've noticed that as a young Western lad it's not hard to get a date with the locals but they mostly just want to "see what the sex is like" and get disappointed when it wasn't as exotic as expected. A few of them do get married, but a lot of them also divorce, or stay together despite one half (or both) cheating on the other.

While it does depend on who you ask, Japanese people's attitude towards the white male/asian female combo is neutral at best. There's a tendency to view the Japanese girlfriend as promiscuous. If there are children involved, they generally get more positive attention than the parents. But there are also lots of positive views, especially if the couple is a bit older and successfully manage a household together. The husband's job (=place in the social hierarchy) also matters.



cyberdad
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15 Feb 2022, 9:27 pm

1986 wrote:
I've noticed that as a young Western lad it's not hard to get a date with the locals but they mostly just want to "see what the sex is like" and get disappointed when it wasn't as exotic as expected. .


There's an interesting dynamic in cross-cultural marriage. Among African Americans the rate of divorce among BM/WW marriages is > average for all marriages in the USA whereas the rate of divorce for BW/WM < average.



auntblabby
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15 Feb 2022, 9:44 pm

i know if i was one of those lucky BW/WM couples, i'd never think of divorcing her unless she really did me wrong.



1986
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15 Feb 2022, 10:19 pm

Here's some data I managed to dig up.

Image


Image


Translation: 34.9% of marriages between two Japanese people end in divorce, whereas the same percentage for international marriages is 50.5%. Marriages where the foreigner is a woman end in divorce in 53.7% of the cases, whereas the percentage for marriages where the foreigner is a man is 43.5%.

Source

The good hand then is a marriage between two Japanese people.
The bad hand is a marriage between a foreign woman and a Japanese man.



auntblabby
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15 Feb 2022, 10:46 pm

a japanese woman and a foreign man sounds better.



cyberdad
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16 Feb 2022, 4:05 am

auntblabby wrote:
i know if i was one of those lucky BW/WM couples, i'd never think of divorcing her unless she really did me wrong.


It looks like BW are actually more loyal with WM than any other group including AW and WW.



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16 Feb 2022, 4:10 am

cyberdad wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
i know if i was one of those lucky BW/WM couples, i'd never think of divorcing her unless she really did me wrong.


It looks like BW are actually more loyal with WM than any other group including AW and WW.

i always knew they were special.



cyberdad
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16 Feb 2022, 4:13 am

1986 wrote:
Here's some data I managed to dig up.

Image


Image


Translation: 34.9% of marriages between two Japanese people end in divorce, whereas the same percentage for international marriages is 50.5%. Marriages where the foreigner is a woman end in divorce in 53.7% of the cases, whereas the percentage for marriages where the foreigner is a man is 43.5%.

Source

The good hand then is a marriage between two Japanese people.
The bad hand is a marriage between a foreign woman and a Japanese man.


This gives some interesting insight into the power of Japanese culture in controlling the woman



The_Face_of_Boo
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16 Feb 2022, 4:17 pm

I bet the Japanese is the hardest language in the world.


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The_Face_of_Boo
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16 Feb 2022, 4:29 pm

Or maybe not
https://resources.unbabel.com/blog/japa ... s-to-learn

Arabic harder than Japanese? No f- way; our letters may look nice but aren’t masterpiece arts as Japanese.


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Dox47
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16 Feb 2022, 6:42 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
I bet the Japanese is the hardest language in the world.


Eh, not really, it's completely phonetic and the grammar isn't too complicated, it's the written that's screwy with the two different alphabets and the thousands of kanji pictograms that are somewhat subject to interpretation, all being used at the same time. I taught myself hiragana and katakana in a day through brute force memorization, but I never could get kanji, just too many of them and the meanings don't always make logical sense.


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16 Feb 2022, 6:51 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Or maybe not
https://resources.unbabel.com/blog/japa ... s-to-learn

Arabic harder than Japanese? No f- way; our letters may look nice but aren’t masterpiece arts as Japanese.
Arabic isn't much harder than Hebrew, which I know a little bit of. Once you memorize the syllables each consonant can stand for, you can read its text. Although I like the aesthetic beauty of Hebrew characters better, especially the traditional fonts.

You want a really hard language? Try Chinese!
(And Korean. And Thai.) Not only do you gotta memorize tens of thousands of characters, it's also TONAL. That is, the TONE you pronounce each character in changes its meaning. And it's no secret that one of aspies' biggest difficulties is moderating their tone of voice.

Japanese isn't tonal, but it has elements analogous to accented syllables in European languages. Which is easier for aspies to control.



Last edited by Aspie1 on 16 Feb 2022, 9:18 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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16 Feb 2022, 6:59 pm

Hangul is a very straightforward writing system, 24 letters with 10 of them being vowels.


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1986
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16 Feb 2022, 7:13 pm

Japanese writing is an amalgamation of many dialectal varieties stemming from the time before Japan was a unified, industrialised country. Back then people in the different geographical areas of Japan all pronounced everyday things in a different way, but the written characters were the same, leading to a funny situation where people could communicate in writing but didn't understand each other's spoken language. As a sidenote, literacy in Japan was much higher in medieval Japan compared to Western Europe at the time.

I'm pretty sure a lot of the divorces are caused by language problems. Usually it's the Western partner who gives up, and pressures the Japanese partner to learn more English, which the Japanese see as unfair. Fight and breakups ensue. Seen it happen first hand.



cyberdad
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16 Feb 2022, 8:13 pm

Nothing like a girl to motivate learning a hard language



Aspie1
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16 Feb 2022, 9:29 pm

funeralxempire wrote:
Hangul is a very straightforward writing system, 24 letters with 10 of them being vowels.
You might be right; I don't know Korean. But I did read that it's a tonal language. Which I think means the same written character can be pronounced in multiple tones, where each tone means a different thing.

It's like a therapist saying "aww" when you talk about being emotionally abused by your parents. It could mean many different things: they're mocking you, they saying emotional abuse is cute, they're asking you for more information, etc. But regardless of what their tone means, it's on YOU to figure it out. And they'll never tell you if you ask what it means, because you're expected to JUST KNOW. But while in therapy you can always err on the side of guardedness, in real-life spoken tonal languages, there's no "default" tone; even the flat tone is just a way of pronouncing a character.

Chinese textbooks for foreigners use arrows written above the characters or numbers in superscripts to show tones: there's "rising", "falling", "flat", and maybe more. But Chinese texts for natives have no such arrows. I'm not sure how Korean textbooks handle tones.

I heard fellow Americans say that when a native Chinese or Korean speaker talks to them, they feel like they're being shouted at. That's a byproduct of someone with a tonal-language mindset speaking a non-tonal language. They're probably trying to find the "right" tone in English, where no such concept exists. So it comes of as "shouting". Native Japanese speakers, on the other hand, don't seem to "shout" when speaking English.



Last edited by Aspie1 on 16 Feb 2022, 9:49 pm, edited 1 time in total.