The Dating Pool Dropouts by Olivia Reingold

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I think it was about the same time of this thread I last used it:

viewtopic.php?t=275336

Btw, I think I deleted and recreated account multiple times.

How many different people have you dated on Tinder?

I’ve only dated 4 or 5 people in my life.

Two mehs.

All the other interested matches you see in the other thread were overseas (tweaking gps location to fool Tinder for the sake of experiment).

I thought you met your partner on Tinder.

No, it was on a different non-popular dating app.

Totally random.

I had one actual-human "hit" when I was on Tinder some years ago, pre-diagnosis, and could have almost certainly "closed the deal", if I had been willing to pursue the matter.
I had done the Tinder thing because I was just not sure any more if I had any desire for something beyond the increasingly emotionally-distant, involuntarily celibate relationship I was in.

I opted out of my chance to meet her in person, and "confessed" to my ND partner about having even tried, with the expected result.

Since my breakup almost a year ago, I gave Tinder another shot, right after the breakup, just to feel what e-dating was like in recent times. This was with done, for the first time, with full knowledge of my ASD, and explicit statement of this fact in the Tinder profile.
While I did get some first-stage "hits", I just wasn't up to doing anything about it, and soon abandoned the whole idea. Just the impression I got of how NT women my age, in that area (North Florida) were looking at dating life in late 2022 was very depressing.

I had to drop the lower limit of my "matches'" age to 40 or less to start seeing profiles that didn't seem like last-ditch, highly-guarded efforts to give this whole intimate relationship thing one last go. But the idea of trying to connect with some 35-year old woman seemed like cradle-robbing, at this point, despite my mental age likely still being well behind my calendar age.

I'm pretty sure that I'm only even vaguely compatible with ND women, and the very few NT "Aspie Whisperers" that are out there...

I am willing to try online dating if Jerry doesn't work out but only safe apps like OkCupid, Plenty of Fish or Hinge

I should get the results I want!

^ How do you know they’re safe?

This is interesting and sad:

https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads ... nd%20older

I bet the percentages are even higher for young women.

I was just thinking that the numbers I posted earlier didn’t say anything about the gender divide on Tinder. Taking into account the gender disparity, it could be something like 21% of women and 63% of men among single young people in the US use Tinder.

Last edited by TwilightPrincess on 02 Oct 2023, 3:45 pm, edited 4 times in total.

In response to this data, I can only think

"f*****g men!",

a phrase branded into my synapses when uttered by my perhaps soon to be ex-ex.

She said this while wearing a Pakistani-made Burka, one that I had obtained as a freebie with an order I had placed for VASTLY-unrelated products.

After donning the Burka and peering through the mesh peephole at her blinkered kitchen environs, she gave me a jolt of additional understanding of the plight of women, though to a still-to-this-day vastly incomplete degree.

It’s so sad. I tried one on in a sociology class that had an undercover journalist as a guest speaker.

I wouldn’t use an app. I’ve received enough dick pics already.

All of my earlier online dating experience(up to and including my last relationship beginning in 2009) was through the more "old-fashioned" dating sites, mainly Match.com and one through OKCupid.

The "feel" I got back then from those sites was way less superficial than what I've felt about Tinder.
I wonder what, say Match.com is like now? Have they "gamified" the whole experience, like Tinder?

I did fairly well on the old okcupid, the newer okcupid last I checked however is total garbage, it became a total Tinder-like but with worse features.

Btw, I have lost my okcupid forever , The email tied to the Okc was a private domain email I made that it no longer exists, and when attempted to create a new account it asked me for phone number and it says it is already tied to an existing email.

When I contacted their support, they were like "Oh, we can't help you if you can't reach the email associated to your account".

It is sad when websites that are a niche try to clone more popular, generic websites and then fail at being successful in their own right.

It’s almost always the woman. It’s much harder for ND men to date successfully than ND women.

I wouldn't say that. Many autistic women, including myself, have had horrific experiences with dating.



One study found that 9 out of 10 women on the spectrum have experienced sexual violence.

https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10 ... 52203/full

Even if they have an easier time getting a date, it doesn't mean that it will be a success.

I am talking more about finding dates than it lasting long term.

In my personal experience, with one exception, every Autistic person I know who is in a relationship is female. The one non-single guy I know is with another guy. And all of their partners, with zero exceptions, are non-Autistic. You can imagine how that makes me feel.

Also, most men, both Autistic and allistic, aren’t going around trying to kill women.