ever thought "what if she says YES?"

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If we cant even handle asking a girl out because were clueless, hows an AS guy to keep a relationship going?
Personal experiences anyone?

I tend to sabotage potential relationships because of this...

No one's an expert, but I would say that the only thing that can keep a relationship going is very open communication, especially about all of the wonders of AS. I'm on my second marriage - the first failed for lack of communication on both parts, among other (major) things - but we have been married for over 7 years and are very open about everything.

The thing that gave me the confidence to talk to her in the first place was my strong workout habits at the time. I've had health problems since then that have shaken my confidence back down to nil, but we still talk about everything no matter how intense it gets and are just stubbornly sticking together because we know it's worth it to both of us. She tells me that every one has issues and that it's not worth it to her to leave and go have to deal with someone else's.

One thing we do is that when one of us tells the other, "I love you," we respond with, "why?" and always try to have something good to say, no matter what.

This question terrifies me even more than "what if she says no?"

It scares me too. I tend to think I would drive them nuts, and to a certain extent and worried about losing some of my character and independence as another thread posed. However I'm pretty resolute against this and am determined to find the right person and relationship. I know it can't be conventional.

everybody drives everybody nuts

Theres the rub. Even NT people have difficulty listening to each other properly. Perhaps because we're AWARE of the communication difficuloty we're forewarned.
Even if we were not AS we're still men. I was arguing with a friend of mine about when a woman comes home and is huffy. I said as a man I would give her some space and hope I don't catch any of her bad temperment. My friend said no you should ask her whats wrong. I said "Why doesnt she just come in and say'Man my boss is a jerk" I'll say how so and its all good. I never have trouble telling whn a guy is pissed at his boss he says so.
I don't think this opening of communication movement is entirely fair. Women know we think differently than them. A little efffort on thier part instead of trying to get Oprah to reeducate us all isnt fair handed.
Back to the AS note. I was leaving work early for a date once and my boss gave me the advice"Whatever you do don't let her get to know you!"
He obviously knew I was "eccentric".

I find that it's not getting into a relationship that is difficult for me, but maintaining a healthy one where the opposite side keeps being atracted to you.

some persons can have them as long as your intention is good. it depends on the person that you are with

Fear of rejection, fear of commitment. I do not want to be alone forever, but I know that a relationship I have will inevitably come to an end because of my sabotage, no matter how I do it. It hurts that much more when you care about the other person, too. There have been a lot (for me, anyway) of girls that I have turned down, because I never believed they would want to go out with me, mainly because I thought that they automatically know what I am like. Not true. You know, the thought 'oh my god, if she says yes, all this s**t is going to happen, and I will not know how to cope, I will not know what to say or do to maintain it, I am going to ruin it'. Could just be me and my obsessive, paranoid delusions. Or not.

My ex is a doctor of Psychatriy now. She was the one who suggested I go for testing.
Still i called her familys house on Christmas and she would'nt talk to me.
I never cheated on her or hit her , just had AS.
You'd think because shes a Doctor she would understand but its too much to ask sometimes i guess. Plus theres her own personality to consider. SHe may have had a touch as well, her sister was full blown, much more so than me.
This is why i question if AS people should date each other.
If two blind people get together they can share and help each other in a dark world. But AS are alone because we can't understand nor express, put two of those together intimately and what will you get?

I don't worry about it, deal with the problems as the come up.

I'm fairly certain that once I am actually in a relationship, I'll manage better than the initial stages.

I'm actually sort of looking forward to the problems of a relationship, they'll be new things I get to analyze.