My brother STILL has issues with me getting married and...

Post Reply New Topic

leaving home!! !

I don't know what else to do but create a plan behind-the-scenes with Jonathan or someone else and just silently leave him

That might actually be the best possible course of action to take!

I want to be one of their roommates before getting married

What do you guys think?

Should I continue with "The Liberation of Sara" or just abandon my goals altogether?

Chances are, your brother behaves this way because he's never been put in a position where he had to fend for himself. I would just start leaving him one night at a time and then gradually increasing the time until he starts to become more self-sufficient. Sounds like it's doing neither of you any good with his dependency on others.

It might even be worth booking a hotel close to home and spending a day or two in it.

You are absolutely right

He is scared of suddenly being in such a vulnerable position of being forced to fend for himself and doesn't know how to handle or approach that

That IS the solution but now I would need to find someone who is willing to let me spend the night with them!

Maybe Jonathan but I don't want him to have expectations of sex too early

I would just tell him this is NOT for relationship purposes but is to help my brother adjust to his eventual new reality

A hotel is a possibility too

Maybe you both can work on teaching him skills so that he can care for himself on his own?

You can always reassure him that it will probably quite some time before any major life changes are going to happen.

Oh I don't know about that

I have known Jerry for about a year or year and a half now and he is coming here next month to possibly live with us!

If we work out then it shouldn't be too much longer for marriage

Otherwise I have known Jonathan and Jesse for 5 months so yeah once we have our first kiss and sex everything else will happen REALLY fast!! !

And that scares him!

i assume your husband was the one who asked you out and pursued you

Husband?!?

Lol I wish!! !

Marriage is what I am trying to get to!

Relationships can go on for years, sometimes 10 years or so before a dude is ready to get married, so I wouldn't put all of your hopes into that. It seems unrealistic.

I know I can eventually get to my marriage goal!

Maybe by trying on wedding dresses at thrift shops and formal clothing stores in combination with actually visualizing my wedding that will make it manifest faster!! !

I have an advantage with Jonathan

He has been married in past which might actually make the process go faster!

Has he said he wants to get married?

Well the situation could get interesting when Jerry shows up.

It took me 3 weeks

It just depends on the person and their state of readiness

I am pretty sure Jonathan said he wants to get remarried!

Spending the night with him would allow us to see what it would be like together in that environment BEFORE getting married or co-habitating

Most of the time sex, especially first-time sex is the thing that destroys a relationship and it NEVER leads to marriage - so cool your jets as they say

Yeah might want to hold off until marriage for sex...