I require assistance!

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I really like a girl, but she has no idea. She's the best friend of my old best friend. What's worse is that my friend that likes her too told her I was gay. There's also a girl I mainly talk to online. (only way I seem normal, period) I like her, but not as much as I like the above person. The people I like aren't "Really Hot," but girls who have great personalities, and who are generally nice.

I wouldn't say I'm ugly, and many girls like me (Girls describe me as cute and sweet )...yet I don't know how to talk to them.
How do I respond to small talk? How do I sustain a two-sided conversation without listing facts? How do I get the girl I love?
I'm really depressed right now...there's nothing I can do about it! UGH!

Well, if she thinks that, then you can run with it. She'll do things with you without fear of 'consequences'. The trick is to slowly make her realize that your friend is wrong about you. Sounds like dirty pool, trying to put you out of the running that way.

I disagree! That's called playing mindgames right there! Don't weasle your way into her heart by pretending to be gay, then slowly making her realize you're straight. Nah, man! That's totall BS. If you like someone, then show her the respect by being upfront with them.

If she doesn't like you, then she doesn't like you, and you'll just have to find another girl.

My advice to the OP is to walk right up to that girl he likes, tell her straight up "I'm not gay...and this is how I feel about you..."

Nah, joke about your "gayness."

"Nah, she just said that to keep me to herself."

Slip into conversation that you're stragiht, but I would advise against walking up to a girl and spilling your guts.

What kind of friend is this? I am not against gayness but a friend who gives wrong info about his friend can't be a friend. I think this jerk is trying to ruin your image among girls and this would have very ugly consequences later . This unusual situation happened to me before personally at school , in this case you have to act boldly ...the more you wait the more this jerk will try to speard wrong things about your sexuality : You must ask her out ASAP and show real interest in her while doing this , better to ask her out in front of her friends too , I know this is very hard but you have to do it! She might feel uncomfortable and she might reject you (and this what happened to me, she rejected me nicely) but you'll prove that your 'friend' is a big damn liar and the other girls would look at you in a positive perspective.

LPP is right, back when I was your age those were fighting words. In my current job they still would be, at least if it wasn't done in a clearly joking manner. Before any PC commando's show up to take me to task for this statement, try working construction for a year and then tell me what can be tolerated or not in my profession.