need some insight or encouragement...please help, if you can

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gingerthecat
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09 Nov 2005, 8:21 pm

I have known a girl since beginning of the 8th grade...which is just over 2 years now, and I would like to know how to go about finding out if she is into me...how can you tell? WE have been keeping in communication through phone and e-mail so far.[/b]



Serissa
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09 Nov 2005, 8:29 pm

The only way I know how to tell is to ask, but that takes both finesse and gumption, and I can't reccommend the best way to do so, never having initiated anything initially and succeeded.



beentheredonethat
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09 Nov 2005, 8:46 pm

Quote:
I have known a girl since beginning of the 8th grade...which is just over 2 years now, and I would like to know how to go about finding out if she is into me...how can you tell? WE have been keeping in communication through phone and e-mail so far.


Walk up to her, turn on your best smile, and say "How about going to the new Harry Potter thing with me this weekend.

Prepare for rejection....prepare for acceptance. Fear neither.

Beentheredonethat....numerous times....with mixed results



irishmic
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09 Nov 2005, 8:52 pm

Well bro, if she's communicating with you, then she likes you at some level.
Tell her how sexy you think she looks with her hair like that, or in the outfit she is wearing.
Smile, and wait for an answer.
If she smiles or blushes, then she liked what you said.
Go ahead and ask her to that Harry Potter thing.
Have a fun time, and remember to treat her like a princess.
Women, and even young girls love to have their egos flattered.



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09 Nov 2005, 9:12 pm

I've actually been told by the person I like not to ask people out online or on the phone, still not sure if that was a hint or not. :? I say you should ask a friend of hers, or just ask her yourself if she likes you.


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Serissa
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09 Nov 2005, 9:18 pm

Sarcastic_Name wrote:
I've actually been told by the person I like not to ask people out online or on the phone, still not sure if that was a hint or not. :? I say you should ask a friend of hers, or just ask her yourself if she likes you.


Asking people out online is a completely valid method to use!! !! </defensive tone>



Sarcastic_Name
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09 Nov 2005, 9:26 pm

Serissa wrote:
Sarcastic_Name wrote:
I've actually been told by the person I like not to ask people out online or on the phone, still not sure if that was a hint or not. :? I say you should ask a friend of hers, or just ask her yourself if she likes you.


Asking people out online is a completely valid method to use!! !! </defensive tone>


I actually tried it with her once, and I was too subtle about it...or I was rejected. I think people see it as a lack of confidence by not doing it face to face, I don't know.


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Serissa
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09 Nov 2005, 9:42 pm

Sarcastic_Name wrote:
I actually tried it with her once, and I was too subtle about it...or I was rejected. I think people see it as a lack of confidence by not doing it face to face, I don't know.


It definitely indicates a lack of confidence. That doesn't make it totally unusable! :P



GroovyDruid
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09 Nov 2005, 11:47 pm

gingerthecat wrote:
I have known a girl since beginning of the 8th grade...which is just over 2 years now, and I would like to know how to go about finding out if she is into me...how can you tell? WE have been keeping in communication through phone and e-mail so far.[/b]


Eew. Rough area, my friend. 8O

If a friendship goes on for very long, an NT girl will usually get into a "friend" groove, especially at her age, and she will most likely be looking for "cool" and "edgy" in a romance.

I'd have to vote for the Harry Potter idea given above. Go see the flick, and watch for certain signs, specifically if she's nervous around you. Nervous is GOOD. It means she's feeling the edgy thing going on. Does she hold on to your arm or touch you "by accident"? Another good sign. Does she fiddle with her hair and brush it back when she's talking to you? That means she's worried about her appearance in front of you, and is the best sign of all.

Take it slow, I would say. Don't compliment her beyond what you normally do, and DON'T act like you're interested. (Turns a girl off like a lightswitch. Watch the film THE TAO OF STEVE for more instruction on this. I'm very serious...) Just be a good listener and an interesting person. If you get some of this good body language from her on the movie date, then you can move into step two: bumping things out of the "friends" groove. And you can do so with the confidence you crave!

Good luck! :D


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Sarcastic_Name
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10 Nov 2005, 11:58 pm

GroovyDruid, you just answered so many questions that I would've never thought to ask in that post. 8O


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gingerthecat
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11 Nov 2005, 1:53 am

Thank you for the good ideas. I will think it over.



eyeenteepee
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11 Nov 2005, 6:31 am

Anybody see the irony in a bunch of Aspies giving gingerthecat (an NT person) relationship advice? :lol:

It just goes to show, maybe the difference between Aspies and NTs isn't as great as it can be made out sometimes! :)

No disrespect intended ginger, I just had to point that out to everyone...


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gingerthecat
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11 Nov 2005, 6:41 pm

Hi wp friends,
Just to set the record straight, my family member who is Aspie is posting through me because we figured it'd be better if I can monitor the Internet stuff with him...he is using my Nick for right now...he's a high-school age boy who really asked me to post for him...and although I am NT, yes, it's true, we also need help with communication and I find the insight you give on your forum to be really helpful. Once again, thanks for being here. Wrongplanet rocks!

Ginger the Cat