anyone else NOT looking for a partner?

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I feel the same way. I think any girl would end up upset with me because of this so better being alone than being someone's jailer.

I'm in the "yeah, yeah, I'll get round to it.....actaully ,no not just yet, can't be bothered with the emotional upheaval" mindset. I have purposely wrecked *promising* relationships when I was younger, for fear they might lead somewhere and I'd suddenly find myself married due to sheer passive appeasment
I also could not live in the same house as another human being again (my son being the exception, although school holidays make me want to run away), can't be bothered educating someone about AS, and generally sliding into spinsterdom ...well, some version of it.

Really, I just want someone to go to the cinema with, pay me compliments, and hold my hand in the hospital (plus fill out forms) . Who then has to go back to their own house.

How about people with AS/autism dating each other? Maybe, since we understand these things in each other it'd work out a lot easier.

I've come to something a little like that conclusion. Only I'd include girls that are just a bit messed up weird generally. Might sound odd but I've always gotten on better with the freaks of this world, relationships with nice normal girls are fun for a while but they train wreck pretty quickly.

Also you don't really have to have a conventional relationship, it could be poly or something else. I know a couple how are in kind of open part time relationship. They're free to sleep with anyone they want and don't spend all that much time together but are still madly in love with each other. All kinds of different relationships to be had.

Although I still can't relate at all to those actively avoiding relationships, I've pretty much given up on finding a date in college and am no longer looking. I'm in my final year and have a final-year project and then five exams to work on, I no longer have the time.

that's not a very good option. only 1 in about 400 has AS, so most of us will never even meet another AS person. the chances of meeting a fellow aspie that you would at the same time have anything in common with (save for neurology) is extremely small.

Well hey, we got something here which really helps at connecting otherwise disparate individuals across the world: the Internet! *ta-da!*

Exactly, plus there are AS-related social groups.

Not that I condone saving yourself for people diagnosed with AS.

I'm firmly in the active avoidance category.

There have been two people in the past that i have been seriously attracted to, however had anything actually looked like happening with either I'd have run a mile. The fantasy is definitely far more enjoyable than the reality.

I am perfectly happy being alone, and whilst there are times when I crave companionship, the other 99% of the time i would find it suffocating.

There is also the fact that I could never burden someone i cared about with a relationship with myself... disappearing for weeks at a time, amongst other things, would not be fair on them.

So, on balance, unless the other person was as anti-social as me it is definitely not going to happen.

Pretty much in the same boat as anna then here. Glad to see I'm not that strange also.

I effectively ruled myself out for the time being. I wouldn't date myself at the moment so I could expect other people to.

The last couple of attempt highlighted that. I have emotional blunting so am not really feeling bad about it. If my EB receded it might hit me in the face I don't know.

I'm nawt looking for one since I'm already in one xD.

As much as people feel tied down. I'm dee type to nawt let my partner prevent me from doing what I please. Dee only ting I can't do is date/have sex wif other people. If your lover really cares for you, he/she won't stop you from doing what you love. Also, I feel more at peace when I'm wif someone. I actually feel loved. Espically in dee reltionship I'm in now. I don't have ANY drama wif my current BF. I can trust him wif anyting unlike most people anymore. He's help me through so much too.

Sowwie, I wrote too muchhhh >.<

So did they dump you or did you dump them? Of the couple of dozen women I have dated to one degree or another I have only broken it off with 2 - the rest was me landing head first on the curb...

...and 3 months is about the outside limit for me too. I had one relationship last 2.5 years though. I met her at a time I was especialy bitter with women and was pretty awfull too her. I asked her why she stuck with me - she said she liked the challenge. She dumped me when I started to be nice to her... go figure.

I'm not quite to the point of actively avoiding a relationship, but if things continue as they are I can look forward to sitting on my porch with a shotgun yelling at the kids to get of my lawn! *giggle*

Honestly though, the practicallities of biology and existence make me desire to have a partner I can both desire and trust. However, I have yet to find a woman that I feel both ways about that has remotely the same feelings about me. I have found women withone or theother who are interested, but without the desire I won't go there and whithout the trust I won't stay

At this point in time I am seeking to establish friendships with women that I find physically atractive in the hopes that maybe after being friends for a while we will decide that we are a good enough match. I like the feel and smell and look and sounds of women. I desire the hugging and the kissing and other carnal delights but I detest the romantic manipulation. I especialy hate the being paraded about like some trophy or fashion accessory. I want a partner not an owner.

/end rant

yeah, I've reached exactly the same conclusion long ago.



hard to say TBH, I never experienced anything like "official" starting a relationship and "official" breaking up... I thought they only do that in films, but maybe it's just some cultural difference.



LOL yeah I think I have similar perspectives... the crazy old cat woman scenario

you should add the option of "with someone"

You forgot the option "not looking because with someone already." :p

^^ nah, I don't want to make the singles here depressed about the amount of aspies in relationships :p

if you're not single, this is not a poll for you!