uyuy

Post Reply New Topic

uyuy

well, an assertive woman is more likely to break through to a shy guy...

I think it's pretty normal for both guys and girls. Sometimes it's hot to be around someone who doesn't have an issue with taking control.

I think what you're going through is perfectly normal! I agree that control dynamics are a big part of sex and what is perceived as sexy sometimes.

Yummy!

When I get impatient, I can get quite assertive...

I'm really into the assertiveness thing. I'd much prefer a girlfriend who knows what she wants, when she wants it, and isn't afraid to ask for it (or just go for it in some cases ). It takes all the guesswork out of it.
I'm really indifferent to how fast the relationship goes, so I prefer the girl to decide the speed. If it's left up to me, it always goes really slow, because I'm always afraid that if I try anything, I'll get yelled at. Plus it's just kind of sexy in a weird way... haha.

89

Assertiveness is attractive in both genders, because it implies that the person is confident in themself.

th

I thought I liked strong and assertive women for a long time, but eventually figured out that was incorrect.

Strong and assertive women communicate clearly (or at least loudly) what they want. It is that last part that makes the difference. As an Aspie it is extremely difficult for me to pick up on social nuances which is how 80% of communication typically happens. When someone breaks beyond that and communicates in a manner than I can understand, it is like allowing a blind man to see for the first time.

Oh, I quite like a woman who takes charge of her surroundings and makes a practice of asking (politely if not necessarily all that nicely) for precisely what she wants, whatever it happens to be.

Where I run into the problem area is that I seem to be a magnet for women who aren't merely assertive but who in fact cross the line into aggression and don't hold themselves above expressing themselves by dishing out unwanted pain (slapping, pinching, kicking), and it has a maddening tendency to happen in situations wherein I'm not totally free just to get up and remove myself (weekend festivals, out with friends a long way from home and skint for a ride, etc.) --and of course a guy can't ever hit back, no matter the circumstances, so it's usual that I end up pretty much just having to sit there and bear it for the duration.

I've got a few stories that are real doozies and may start up a "your tales of epic fails" on dates, setups and so on. I'll have to see if one's already on the board first, but in any case I don't doubt it'd be therapeutic, educational and good for some LOLz heh.