An article on "bullycide"

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Hey, you're the one mentioning how people think suicide is "stupid". People who think it's "stupid" are in fact clueless and insulting. Sorry, deal with it.

Nice strawman BTW.

I did not realise there was any sort of competition, also I do not think anyones idea is that suicide is the right answer. My main point would probably be certain wording can just trigger someone in that mindset. I mean I never exactly got past the depression or anything and tend to still feel suicidal so trying to argue morality about it just does not really make a lot of sense to me...I mean I think its the wrong answer because its screwed up that anyone would have to feel so bad they seriously see that as a solution not because its 'selfish' or it will 'upset other people.' I mean how would that make me feel better.

But yeah I can't look at it objectively because I have not recovered from the very mindset being discussed, but its a good sign if one can discuss it objectively because that means they've probably more or less moved on or at least are coping with everything better.

Smart people do stupid things every day. I stand by the statement that suicide is a stupid thing to do. And if you honestly believe that attempting to influence the emotions of others is not an extremely common motivation for suicide, then it is you who are clueless.

Sweetleaf, I'm not trying to talk a suicidal person out of killing themselves right now. Of course, if I was in a room with someone in that kind of state, trying to talk them out of it, I'd use more delicate language. But what I'm talking about here are the reasons why I would try to talk them out of it in the first place.

And just being depressed does not remove a person's responsibilities toward their loved ones. Just because hearing that it would upset (and that's not really the right word for it, I'd say devastate hits closer to the mark) them might not make the person feel better, does not make it untrue and does not make it a very good reason to not go through with it.

And if you can't look at it objectively, then maybe an objective discussion (or at least the attempt at one) isn't the best idea for you.

Last edited by mds_02 on 14 Jan 2012, 5:01 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Yes and if you feel they would be better off without you, then what is the responsible thing to do going to seem to be? that is what I ran into.

Which is why I think it's a good idea to tell people exactly why their loved ones are not better off without them.

In my case I sometimes still feel like that, and there is no real convincing me otherwise when it's apparent to me I tend to make things unpleasent for people if I don't have my mental stuff under control. Then of course there is the issue of how I keep it under control and how they would judge me for that. But hey when it comes up it comes up.

When I was in school they did nothing about bullying and had no bullying awareness. Most people turned a blind eye toward it, told you to ignore it, or just told you that you that you needed to learn to deal with it yourself to get along when you grow up. I even had a school counselor tell me that people treated me the way they did because of how I acted. I didn't know how to act any other way.

There were times I thought about suicide and wanted to die but I just hoped when I got older things would get better and was counting the days until I was old enough to quit school. I didn't really have any effective way available and if I didn't think something is better than nothing and there is no such thing as an afterlife it's possible I could have ended up trying to kill myself.

Instead I skipped so much school I had to go to family court multiple times and got sent away a couple of times. Even though I didn't kill myself I removed myself from the situation the only way I knew how.

I don't see people who commit suicide as heroes but as tragic victims of schools and parents not doing anything about bulling.

I wasn't taught it was the worst thing that could happen to me. It was the worst thing to happen to me and I'll never get over it.

Would't it be more logical to kill the bully instead of yourself?
I mean, if there's nothing to lose anyway, why can't those people do the world a favour and make it a more peaceful place?
I mean, if I would have been bullied I would probably not have killed anyone, neither me nor the bully but I would have defended myself until it would have stopped.
People who punish themselves for somebody elses fault should not wonder why nobody respects them.
But in fact I don't even know which kind of bullyism you all mean. Does it really mean that somebody pushes somebody elses head into a toilet? And steady physical violence? Why doesn't this exist in Austria but only in the U.S.? The American schools must have an awful quality.

I mean, verbal violence that can also only be considered as criticism couldn't drive anybody to suicide who isn't full of self hate anyway.
Then it's rather their own inferiority feeling that makes them kill themselves and not "bullying".

Kill a bully, you go to prison. Is it really worth throwing your life behind bars over a bully or for more than one when you have a whole future ahead of you and what you can do in life after you get out of school or quit? People who quit can always go for a GED and then head to college so quitting school isn't the end of the world and that you are doomed for getting employed.


At least in prison, you are just sitting there being locked away and can't go anywhere and can't get married and have kids and enjoy the freedom people get outside of prison and who wants that life? To me, going to school and shooting up all the bullies isn't worth it and wouldn't be back then either. Kids who skip school, can they at least do their school work at home and then turn it in at school and then go back for more assignments and do them at home? It wouldn't be like they are truly skipping school since they are still getting their work done.

Yes it would be more logical to kill the bully.

I was unable to defend myself. I'm weak, shy, and passive. I don't even know how to defend myself now except by avoiding people.

If I had killed myself it wouldn't have been to punish anyone. It would have been my only way to escape from a bad situation. I think it's horrible how kids are forced to go to school and get abused with no way to escape. If I could have been home schooled I may have turned out much differently but people didn't do it as much back then, no one suggested it to my mother, and I don't think I even knew it was an option back then.

Actually the couple of times I remember trying to physically defend myself I once got retaliation and once got suspended from the school bus.

Last edited by hanyo on 14 Jan 2012, 6:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.

so what you're saying is that part of the reason you have been suicidal is that you feel that others would be better off without you. but, you also think that if it were ingrained into you that that was not the case, it wouldn't help.

I said I wouldn't do it myself, I only said that it's still better than committing suicide.
And as I said, "if there's nothing to lose anyway". Somebody who is about to commit suicide has nothing to lose.

in some cases, much worse than that. and in some cases, kids kill themselves over nothing more than words.

Last edited by mds_02 on 14 Jan 2012, 6:26 pm, edited 1 time in total.

don't you think it would be helpful then if we were to teach kids how to defend themselves, mentally first, then physically if necessary.

what about terrorizing the bully?
or make him realise that he may be superior with his fists but even a small child can stab a sleeping body builder.
Or put poison in his drink. A bully would only feel totally free to abuse others as long as there's no risk, as long as the victims don't seem to even think of fighting back. A simple menace might keep him away.

I don't know if it would have helped me but I think it would be helpful for many people.

I was mostly just told to ignore it, when anyone even bothered to acknowledge that any bullying was happening.