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ping-machine
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01 Aug 2007, 3:09 am

When my mum rings me, she always says, "So, do you have any friends yet?"

Why would I need friends, when everyone I talk to is just not into the same stuff as me? And I live in a town where no sooner have I met them then nine times out of ten they move out? And I like to hang out on my own!! !

Why would I want to go out and socialise with people who only ever talk about boring stuff?

She's so frustrating sometimes!


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BenJ
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01 Aug 2007, 5:18 am

Be true to yourself. Its ok if you dont know anyone you enjoy spending time with, your mother should understand that. Its not as if it is your fault. Its everyone else's.


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Comet
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01 Aug 2007, 8:56 am

Dont worry i have no friend's where i live if you need a friend we can pm each other :)



edal
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01 Aug 2007, 12:42 pm

Two or three. From what I've seen AS sufferers seem to only have a handful of friends but NTs have lots more. Maybe NTs need to learn the difference between 'friends' and 'people who I know'.

Ed Almos



aaronrey
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01 Aug 2007, 1:00 pm

my mom also keeps telling me to make friends. however, most people i meet only care about making money, buying new expensive cars, going shopping, getting laid. they brag about their new promotion, their raised salary etc. why would i want to be friends with them. it's hard for me to find people who are into the same things as me. for example, i like star trek. it's hard for me to find people who are also into star trek. most people just 'know' what star trek is. they might know who the main characters are but they dont know the details, the plots, the minor characters so it's hard for me to talk about star trek with those people. besides, they would probably change the subject into something like fashion anyway.



edal
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01 Aug 2007, 3:22 pm

Good to meet a fellow Trekkie.

Live long and prosper 8)

Ed Almos



boots1123
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01 Aug 2007, 4:57 pm

I read a psych study, maybe 10 years ago, that proposed most people only have 1 to 3 friends, by a traditional definition of the word.

I agree that the term 'friend' is often used loosely, and that many people need to differentiate between friends and acquaintances.



pbcoll
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02 Aug 2007, 11:05 am

I have the same problem, but with my nan. Given that I have no interest in fashion, Big Brother, celebrities, cars, shopping, sports, gameshows, pop music or Harry Potter, I have little to talk about with anyone in person. Pretending I'm interested in things I'm not deceives no one and achieves nothing. So I have a few acquaintances I get along with, but haven't made friends in a long time. My experiences with friendships have not been very bad, but very consistent: friends are difficult to make and take ages, and the friendship does not last (out of sight, out of mind) nor have my 'friends' been there for me when I needed their moral support. I've seen good friendships, but they're things that happen to other people. Fair-weather, disposable friendships hardly seem worth the time and effort it takes me to make them, I could be doing something useful instead like hoovering my room or doing the laundry.


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Kilroy
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02 Aug 2007, 11:19 am

no...never really have to be honest



EatingPoetry
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02 Aug 2007, 1:51 pm

I'm 40 and I don't really have any friends. I don't socialize and I don't want to. My mom knows this about me and has pretty much accepted it. But she was really happy to know I was talking to people on the internet.

My grandma always ask me if I have any nice little friends. I lie. She lives far away and it makes her happy, so what the heck.


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spacedog
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02 Aug 2007, 9:01 pm

HeT, nope, nada. :(


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Brittany2907
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03 Aug 2007, 5:50 am

"Friends"
That word is one that I dread.

Some people pretend to be you're friend, and just use you for things other than the actual friendship itself. I have had lots of experience with that, and therefore I take a VERY LONG TIME to trust people.

Well, to get straight to what I'm trying to say, is I don't have any "friends", but some aquaintances such as my neighbour, who is 24, and someone from back in high-school who I rarely talk to now.

I would consider my pets as better friends, more than I would any human being. They are loyal, non-judgemental and are great companions. What is really good is that I can talk to them without them getting bored :D


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woodsman25
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03 Aug 2007, 9:57 am

I have a small group of friends i hang with on the weekends, we r going camping in the adirondacks next weekend, they r bringing their GF's, im going alone.


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MrSinister
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04 Aug 2007, 7:33 am

I have a few, but they're not really close friends.


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chimpy
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04 Aug 2007, 11:24 am

I don't have any REAL friends, if you understand what I mean. I can divide people around me into three categories. First, the people who find the "friendship" with me advantageous, thus they pretend friendship to get the benefit. Then there are people who just think I'm weird, thus they are trying to minimize any social interaction with me to do not embarass themselves. The third group is very similar to the first one; however, these people are too dumb to get any intellectual benefit from the pretended friendship. They are doing this just because my aspie nature makes me ideal target of their jokes. I have no idea how to defend myself, so I'm just ignoring it.

Unfortunatelly, there is a very important characteristics in the NTs' world called "reputation". It's formed by people around, especially by the people from third group. I know that my ignorance is giving me bad points in the NTs' world, but I have no idea how to change this without any REAL friends.

I already experienced a moment when accumulated bad reputation seriously downgraded quality of my life. I have no clue how to prevent this happening in the future.



ghostgurl
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04 Aug 2007, 1:08 pm

I know my mom keeps telling me I need to have friends because I need the interaction. I don't really want any friends because I'm happy in my solitude, but even if I did no one would share my interests anyway. Why can't she get that? :x


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