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Raymond_Fawkes
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30 Sep 2010, 2:21 pm

I live a desolate lifestyle, I'm isolated and alone, but not lonely. I choose and go through life like this and it's like I'm not even aware of it. I used to be really socially active, but now that I'm a adult (in my young 20's) I'm just more retracted. My motor skills are so poor, but yet when I'm online it's like i feel totally different. I type around 70-75 wpm , way faster then my actual speaking skills .. I was wondering, How can I meet real life friends and how can I move forward with my life. My names Raymond.



emlion
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30 Sep 2010, 3:58 pm

But everybody loves Raymond. :D



R_odin
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30 Sep 2010, 4:32 pm

Don't be afraid of new challenges and fear of messing up. Grab anything that comes your way (I took a free 3day trip to Paris two years ago, some student gathering in Bercy). They say it's better to do and regret than not do it at all. Try doing different things and hobbies, a foreign language course for example. Just don't stand still.



Justifine
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04 Oct 2010, 2:20 am

A good way to improve is to listen to what other people are saying. If someone sees a behavior that they think is off-putting or will make your relationships with others difficult, listen to them instead of writing off what they have to say. Others can see things that you can't since they are looking at you from a different perspective. Be open to constructive thoughts and take note.



Sahmiam
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09 Oct 2010, 2:13 pm

I understand where you're coming from (with slower typing skills!), so I probably don't have any advice that you haven't already thought of. ;)

If you haven't already, try to learn a bit about face to face social skills. Taking a speech/ communication class at your local college can help with that because they teach you how to address various groups of people. That's not to say you'll go around making speeches to people. but they address things such as tone, volume, and visual cues.

Also, look for a book about body language. I read one many years ago and it was helpful. There are some easy things you will be able to change about yourself if you are interested in doing so, such as how you hold your arms, how close you stand, where you look, etc. I'm not trying to say to change the person you are, just that if you're interested, you can learn to fake good social skills.

Lastly, when you go out to places where you may come into contact with people you may befriend, remember to take a shower, brush your teeth, and wear clean clothes. :)



Chronos
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10 Oct 2010, 1:25 am

Raymond_Fawkes wrote:
I live a desolate lifestyle, I'm isolated and alone, but not lonely. I choose and go through life like this and it's like I'm not even aware of it. I used to be really socially active, but now that I'm a adult (in my young 20's) I'm just more retracted. My motor skills are so poor, but yet when I'm online it's like i feel totally different. I type around 70-75 wpm , way faster then my actual speaking skills .. I was wondering, How can I meet real life friends and how can I move forward with my life. My names Raymond.


You get involved in some type of social group or activity and force yourself to go.