Memory Lapses and Regression
SanityTheorist
Veteran
Joined: 13 Feb 2012
Age: 30
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,105
Location: The Akuma Afterglow
Does anyone else here regress to previous sets of standards when you look up something from your past? I have at times responded in anger and been completely unaware of what I have said, which makes it awkward around my mentor. This usually happens in cases of artwork, video games and bands I used to like which is frustrating as I would like to have my interests be more streamlined.
Has this happened to anyone else here? The regressions can be quite frustrating and damage relationships with people.
_________________
My music at: http://www.youtube.com/user/SanityTheorist5/videos
Currently working on getting in a studio to record my solo album 40+ tracks written.
Chatroom nicks: MetalFluttershy/MetalTwilight/SanityTheorist
SanityTheorist
Veteran
Joined: 13 Feb 2012
Age: 30
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,105
Location: The Akuma Afterglow
Well I am an artist and they are known for irrational emotions at times Could be part of it haha.
_________________
My music at: http://www.youtube.com/user/SanityTheorist5/videos
Currently working on getting in a studio to record my solo album 40+ tracks written.
Chatroom nicks: MetalFluttershy/MetalTwilight/SanityTheorist
Same here. I found that as my self-awareness had grown so did my anger when I recalled memories because I would see myself in a different context. One of the most common memories for this were from my interaction with females as a teenager. Growing up I endured a lot of humiliation but I pushed myself like an obsessive masochist to endure and I managed to adapt and emulate NT behavior well enough to be accepted as a "weird loser". I can recall multiple times of girls coming on to me but since I had a frenemie since 3rd grade who ground my self-respect into the dirt, my self-esteem rendered me completely oblivious to female expressions of interest toward me. By sheer principle that girls couldn't like me I let a lot of fun opportunities slip by.
Now, having realized I'm an aspie, I've forgiven myself, but when you're a teenager trying to fit in with NT's, getting girls is a major source of respect. Ironic that I craved NT respect all my life and now that I've come to terms with being an aspie I really could care less about it.
Mentors can be very cool. I miss mine...she's passed on about 12 years ago. Now I mentor art students and it's not always easy.
Relationships with mentors are funny things. I find even my NT students have regression episodes at certain stages, and their artwork regresses right along with their emotions and mentality. And then in a few weeks it's all sorted and they make better art and their maturity level is higher than it was before. It makes my head swim.
I've found that sometimes it might seem like I've regressed to a previous set of standards, when they are actually my baseline standards, and some of the world's standards (that I push myself for normally) are compensation and frustrating. For a long time I mistook this for regression when it was actually due to some form/cause of exhaustion.
It helps somewhat to take more breaks and do grounding with activities I like when I'm doing a lot of looking back. (ie, get out of my head), and to be more aware of pushing myself too hard. Real regression happens though, and there are ways to make it not so strong. A good therapist can help you learn tools to cope with it.
In the title you mention memory lapses, but talk about regression in the post. What kind of memory lapses are you having?
SanityTheorist
Veteran
Joined: 13 Feb 2012
Age: 30
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,105
Location: The Akuma Afterglow
Interesting phyrehawke.
The memory lapses are related to what I said when I seemingly regress back to previous interests and the memories involved with them are just absent...but not to other people. Maybe it's a form of complete retreat from the world.
_________________
My music at: http://www.youtube.com/user/SanityTheorist5/videos
Currently working on getting in a studio to record my solo album 40+ tracks written.
Chatroom nicks: MetalFluttershy/MetalTwilight/SanityTheorist
Similar Topics | |
---|---|
Regression, Burnout and Special Interests |
05 Mar 2024, 4:08 pm |
Unlocking the Secrets Behind Age-Related Memory Loss |
01 Apr 2024, 5:08 pm |