any aspeys feel their good at socializing?

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infilove
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26 Sep 2012, 3:56 pm

Any Aspeys or people on the spectrum that feel they are good at socializing and don't feel they struggle that much in talking with people, being confident socially, and making/keeping friends ect?


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eric76
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26 Sep 2012, 4:25 pm

I find it rather odd that with one exception the people who I consider friends made the first move. Actually, the first ten or twenty moves.

The one exception is someone I shared an office with as a grad student. That time it was more mutual friendship that developed over time.



lotuspuppy
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26 Sep 2012, 4:41 pm

I do when I am forced to. It doesn't come naturally to me at all, and I don't go out of my way to socialize at all. The socializing I do is very business-like and work oriented. When I do socialize with real friends or colleagues I work closely with, it tends to be with my Aspie self.



greguniverse
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26 Sep 2012, 5:47 pm

I'm good at being friends or being friendly. I'm complete rubbish in groups though. My voice is really soft and monotone. My thoughts get interrupted a lot of the time. After some time I have become better at recognizing when to start talking. I prefer social interaction over the internet or over phone it seems to be easier to get what I want to say across.



the_phoenix
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26 Sep 2012, 6:17 pm

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ... um, the answer would be "no."
:)

...


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infilove
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27 Sep 2012, 1:49 pm

Most of the time I have trouble socializing but there are times, especially when I force myself to get out there and talk to people, I will often fall into this sort of this "social high" where I often socialize better then usual. This usually happens when I talk to a few people and kind of get out of my nervous shell and all fear drops. This doesn't happen very often though because it's sometimes hard to get to that point.


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rosemund
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27 Sep 2012, 2:42 pm

I socialize well if it is a workplace scenario and/or I have a specific topic I'm supposed to cover. When I worked retail, I was selling products, so I had a topic. As an educational advisor, I'm disseminating information, so it's relatively easy. If they keep interrupting me though, because they're anxious, then I tend to get "stimmy" and ask them to wait, let me finish my spiel, then they can ask anything they might still have questions on. Normally, this works out well.

Among friends or in the general public, I am good to order a hot chocolate or drink, unless there is good music. Music, particularly with a nice beat, that can break me of the Apsieishness. Otherwise, I don't say a word all night.



equestriatola
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27 Sep 2012, 2:47 pm

I feel like I am having the most difficult time doing so; as a result, this is one of my woes in life, sadly to say.


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27 Sep 2012, 4:00 pm

I'm not very good at social chat with people I don't know well. I don't have masses of friends but I have a lot more than many people I see on here saying they have none at all, or only a few.

I have a big group of friends from one area of my life. There are people within the group I'm not as close to, but there's some I have a really close bond with. I have one friend left from school, but the breakdown of my relationship with my best friend from school wasn't down to me being autistic.

I also have a colleague I'm pretty close to, and a couple of other friends from other walks of life.

Put it this way: I'm good at keeping the friends I do make, I just find the initial speaking to people/making friends difficult. If I don't click with someone, it's unlikely we'll grow close.



Joe90
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27 Sep 2012, 4:31 pm

I thought I was. Now I'm not so sure.


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