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WaltD
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10 Dec 2013, 2:21 pm

Turned 50 last month and starting to give up on life
would just be able to learn how to read people's faces
:(


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skcuf
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10 Dec 2013, 3:35 pm

Watch the show "Lie to me." It could help and it's pretty interesting.



Aoi
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10 Dec 2013, 7:33 pm

I'm just shy of 50 and still struggling in this area. Besides face blindness, I lack a sense of smell, which is a bad combination for face-to-face communication. I miss virtually everything. I don't like it either.

In addition to "Lie to Me," you could read books by the likes of Paul Ekman, try occupational therapy (if available), or use alternate strategies. Here are the ones that work well for me.

1. Talk to people on the phone.
2. Talk to people in dark or bright environments.
3. Realize that NTs aren't nearly as good as reading faces as they think they are. A major advantage they have is that they tend to make similar mistakes, which are different from the ones aspies/auties make.
4. Use a friend to help you if you need it in certain situations (this has never worked for me, but it's a common suggestion in books about Asperger's).
5. Don't worry about it. You're not missing as much as you think.

The last one is the one that helps me the most. I know I'm missing a lot. I'm missing the entire domain of odors, too. This is good and bad. I have no idea how many times I've persevered because I didn't see the facial cues to stop, and as a result gotten something I wanted. I'm rarely offended, upset, or angered when interacting with people (that would require getting information I don't have access to). I can go on about the "benefits," but you probably get the idea.



WaltD
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12 Dec 2013, 5:10 am

Thanks; I am going to read a Paul Ekman book and stop worrying!

The show "Lie to me" is enjoyable but not very helpful because I am not trying to figure out who committed the crime and because of my autism I can not focus in on a face/eyes let alone slow the picture down. (I do replay the situation in my head afterwards; usually it reveals my social mistake but I don't seem to learn from it)
Actually I can't see the difference between a friendly face and a neutral or aggressive face. Have no clue if someone wants to talk or not. I also can't make the transition from eye-contact to verbal-contact. I can not make my face friendly and open AND talk; it's one or the other and that's not good enough i guess.