Page 1 of 1 [ 10 posts ] 

KingofKaboom
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Oct 2007
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,471

15 Feb 2014, 8:48 am

I once had a female friend who says she has never had feelings for me try to initiate phone sex with me. She tried for maybe a good half hour before giving up it was a long call. Claimed she was drunk, we've been drunk together many many times any she's never done anything like this. I've blacked out and only given women compliments. So I was wondering what women think of it?

My self esteem has been really low for a long time. Right now I'm working on improving it as best I can. It ruins my relationships and makes me pretty much impossible to be happy. This one person has done a lot single handedly to hurt my self esteem and I did a lot of things that all match up with a person who has low self esteem. Maybe this is something they did when they broke up with ex and had low self esteem too. I don't really know. This person may contact me again one day they say they care about me and even put up with a lot of crap to be perfectly honest all because of my low self esteem too. My social skills are really good now. I'm really fun to be around and everyone thinks I'm a funny great guy. I need to start believing these people and believing in myself more. I've done a lot of great things in my life that everyone said I never could do. I take the mean things they say to heart. Sorry getting off topic just trying to boost myself esteem wherever I can because I know I'm a great person really. Main topic above haha.


_________________
Tacos (optional)


AngelRho
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jan 2008
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 8,622
Location: The Landmass between N.O. and Mobile

15 Feb 2014, 9:15 am

My wife said this, since you're looking for a female perspective:

It's kinda like when you get a lot of drunk rednecks together, one guy shouts, "Hey y'all, watch THIS!" and it's the last thing he ever says.

You said the girl was DRUNK. My wife has been drunk plenty of times when she was younger, and things she'd NEVER even think about doing all of a sudden she's like, "aw, what the hell…" She was either trying to have a little fun with you by manipulating you into doing something uncomfortable, or she was really into it and had no idea what she was doing/who she was doing it with.

My woman says your best bet is to just let it go and get over it.



KingofKaboom
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Oct 2007
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,471

15 Feb 2014, 9:27 am

oh no she knew all these things and was aware although drunk. She was not black out drunk. She knew exactly what she was doing and didn't even have a slur in her speech. Believe me she's been drunk lots of times and never done this. I disagree with what your wife has said simply from my experience at the time. She's been drunk lots of times but never so drunk that she does anything inappropriate. I'm fairly certain she meant to. But that's my opinion. And I asked her about it once she said "Idk maybe I was drunk" so yes it didn't mean much to her but she was willing to do it all the same. That and she had me watch her while she fell asleep on skype. I think she atleast finds me attractive which boosts my self esteem.


_________________
Tacos (optional)


buffinator
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Dec 2013
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 651
Location: Illinois

15 Feb 2014, 12:05 pm

KingofKaboom wrote:
oh no she knew all these things and was aware although drunk. She was not black out drunk. She knew exactly what she was doing and didn't even have a slur in her speech. Believe me she's been drunk lots of times and never done this. I disagree with what your wife has said simply from my experience at the time. She's been drunk lots of times but never so drunk that she does anything inappropriate. I'm fairly certain she meant to. But that's my opinion. And I asked her about it once she said "Idk maybe I was drunk" so yes it didn't mean much to her but she was willing to do it all the same. That and she had me watch her while she fell asleep on skype. I think she atleast finds me attractive which boosts my self esteem.


Just FYI no woman will be honest when asked about a failed sexual overture.


_________________
AQ: 31
Your Aspie score: 135 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 63 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie


KingofKaboom
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Oct 2007
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,471

15 Feb 2014, 12:25 pm

buffinator wrote:
KingofKaboom wrote:
oh no she knew all these things and was aware although drunk. She was not black out drunk. She knew exactly what she was doing and didn't even have a slur in her speech. Believe me she's been drunk lots of times and never done this. I disagree with what your wife has said simply from my experience at the time. She's been drunk lots of times but never so drunk that she does anything inappropriate. I'm fairly certain she meant to. But that's my opinion. And I asked her about it once she said "Idk maybe I was drunk" so yes it didn't mean much to her but she was willing to do it all the same. That and she had me watch her while she fell asleep on skype. I think she atleast finds me attractive which boosts my self esteem.


Just FYI no woman will be honest when asked about a failed sexual overture.

Ah, I didn't know that. Well she isn't interested but she may have been H***** and single wanting some release. It's cool I forgive it, she at the time thought I was a perv lots of girls have kinda thought the same ha...


_________________
Tacos (optional)


AngelRho
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jan 2008
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 8,622
Location: The Landmass between N.O. and Mobile

15 Feb 2014, 1:28 pm

KingofKaboom wrote:
oh no she knew all these things and was aware although drunk. She was not black out drunk. She knew exactly what she was doing and didn't even have a slur in her speech. Believe me she's been drunk lots of times and never done this. I disagree with what your wife has said simply from my experience at the time. She's been drunk lots of times but never so drunk that she does anything inappropriate. I'm fairly certain she meant to. But that's my opinion. And I asked her about it once she said "Idk maybe I was drunk" so yes it didn't mean much to her but she was willing to do it all the same. That and she had me watch her while she fell asleep on skype. I think she atleast finds me attractive which boosts my self esteem.

Well, look at this:

KingofKaboom wrote:
she said "Idk maybe I was drunk"


Alcohol erodes inhibitions. Everyone knows that. She was in a mood to begin with. The alcohol allowed her to act out a little bit more. Kinda like the way my then-gf would get drunk and make out with or sleep with other guys during that time we couldn't be together. What can I say? Tequila makes her clothes fall off. A girl doesn't have to be blacked-out drunk or "white-girl drunk" for that. Some girls only need to be lightly buzzed for that.

And you wouldn't even really recognize her as the same person now after we've gotten our act together. Your girl got a little loosened up and felt like being bad just for the fun of it. I'd contend that she's being inappropriate. But, on the other hand, if she's not just having fun at your expense, it might not be a bad opportunity to see if the relationship might have potential as something more than purely platonic.

I love watching females fall asleep. It's not even a sexual/romantic thing with me, I just think it's adorable. My daughter still likes to curl up in my lap and pass out. My oldest son does, too, but he's at that age now where that's just, well, WEIRD. I had a brief, IDK, "thing" with an older woman when I was in college. She liked to fall asleep on me. It never turned sexual or anything--she wanted it to, but I didn't. She'd just lay down and take a nap on me, and it was awesome. My wife does it all the time, too, and usually it happens while she's reading a book. I'll quietly take away her book/iPad and turn off her lamp MOST of the time, or if I'm just too lazy I'll tell her to put her things away and turn off the light. One night she barely opened her eyes and said "OK, daddy." Those kinds of things never get old.



KingofKaboom
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Oct 2007
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,471

15 Feb 2014, 1:55 pm

I don't watch friends fall asleep -.-. It isn't about enjoying it. It's about them being a woman I like and have feelings for. I won't just watch some random chick fall asleep that's weird. Just because I enjoyed it doesn't make it ok. She explained it as "emotion" I asked her which emotion. She said it was a mistake. It isn't about my enjoying it it's about it being appropriate.


_________________
Tacos (optional)


AngelRho
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jan 2008
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 8,622
Location: The Landmass between N.O. and Mobile

15 Feb 2014, 2:11 pm

KingofKaboom wrote:
I don't watch friends fall asleep -.-. It isn't about enjoying it. It's about them being a woman I like and have feelings for. I won't just watch some random chick fall asleep that's weird. Just because I enjoyed it doesn't make it ok. She explained it as "emotion" I asked her which emotion. She said it was a mistake. It isn't about my enjoying it it's about it being appropriate.

To each his own. I mean, I wouldn't just be like, "hey, can I watch you fall asleep?" to whatever random girl. I WOULD be, like, "hey I like to watch girls fall asleep…does that creep you out?" If so, ok. I enjoy it…I don't obsess over it. If a girl tells me, "hey, you're being weird," then I'll stop whatever it is.

BTW, what are you referring to as a mistake? The phone sex thing? I'm trying to figure out if she's really attracted to you or if she's just stringing you along.



Willard
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Mar 2008
Age: 62
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,647

15 Feb 2014, 4:37 pm

...



Last edited by Willard on 17 Feb 2014, 3:39 pm, edited 1 time in total.

KingofKaboom
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Oct 2007
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,471

15 Feb 2014, 8:11 pm

AngelRho wrote:
KingofKaboom wrote:
I don't watch friends fall asleep -.-. It isn't about enjoying it. It's about them being a woman I like and have feelings for. I won't just watch some random chick fall asleep that's weird. Just because I enjoyed it doesn't make it ok. She explained it as "emotion" I asked her which emotion. She said it was a mistake. It isn't about my enjoying it it's about it being appropriate.

To each his own. I mean, I wouldn't just be like, "hey, can I watch you fall asleep?" to whatever random girl. I WOULD be, like, "hey I like to watch girls fall asleep…does that creep you out?" If so, ok. I enjoy it…I don't obsess over it. If a girl tells me, "hey, you're being weird," then I'll stop whatever it is.

BTW, what are you referring to as a mistake? The phone sex thing? I'm trying to figure out if she's really attracted to you or if she's just stringing you along.
I never even thought of watching her fall asleep that was entirely her idea one day we were on skype and she was going to bed like usual and instead of hanging up she wanted to listen to me talk while she fell asleep. She said she did it "for the emotion" and said it was a mistake misplacing her emotions.


_________________
Tacos (optional)