Made a big mistake on Facebook
Yes, call me a sad screw-up but I was depressed a few months ago and kept on feeling sorry for myself and letting Facebook know. Well, I didn't post dramatic posts, but I did put a few ''I feel sorry for myself'' posts. Now I am regretting it.
I am regretting it because now (I am on antidepressants and have a boyfriend) each time I post something, I'm lucky to even get a like, while others get, like, 5 likes or more when they post useless crap or even their sob stories, and they post more sob stories than I ever did, and they get a string of sympathetic comments.
The most notifications I get is ''X has invited you to play Y''. Those get frustrating.
But I reckon that back when I was lonely and depressed, some people set their thing so that my posts don't show up on their news feed, because they are too polite to unfriend me, but to me there's not a lot of difference. I try to post witty videos or a funny joke what most people like, or sometimes saying where I am with who, so that it looks like I have a life outside of Facebook (which I do). But still no likes, except for the occasional times.
I suppose there's nothing I can do to win back close Facebook friends. But I don't want to come off Facebook, as it's the only way to find gossip, and call me NT but I do love gossip (I don't spread it, I just like to hear it).
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Female
I'll "Like" you on FB.
Seriously, you have a boyfriend, who cares about Facebook, go have hot wikkid sex then go out for pizza or something.
Rinse and repeat.
F*ck FB, go out and make new friends for it while you're having pizza after all the wikkid sex.
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(14.01.b) cogito ergo sum confusus
I don't understand what you mean.
I usually get no likes. Two is the most I ever got. What is the fuss about anyway?
I don't "like" other people posts too, usually I don't ever read what they share. It is enough for me to have access to info about them when I need it, no need to make fuss about every little thing they share. Thanks to facebook I know my friend is in another country right now - he spams his wall with photos. And also from facebook I acknowledged my another friend got a baby. I didn't "like" it but I know the stuffs so I am not surprised when someone mentions it. But I don't share the info with anyone myself. My mom told me recently: "You know your friend is abroad?" because she talked to his mom, "I know." - I answered, "Why didn't you tell me?". My answer was: "Why should I?" . I don't get the gossip thing. What I know - I know - but why should I tell it to other people?
diniesaur
Veteran
Joined: 2 Sep 2011
Age: 29
Gender: Male
Posts: 758
Location: in the Ministry of Silly Walks
I don't think it's actually people choosing to ignore you remove your posts. The way Facebook works, the more people "like" and comment on your posts, the more future posts of yours will show up in their news feed (and others'). People may have felt awkward or whatever with your more depressing posts or didn't really know what to say, so they didn't respond to them...and because of how Facebook's news feed algorithm works, now they're not seeing the posts of yours that they'd enjoy as often.
If you're really concerned about getting likes on your posts and having people see your stuff, maybe try sharing a picture you think someone you know would really enjoy, and tagging that person in there so that person would see it. And when that person likes or comments on it, others are more likely to see it as well, and eventually if you do that a couple times (maybe no more than once a week, and also do different people each time) people will start to see your other posts as well. Also, just keep posting and eventually someone will see your stuff.
...that being said, I don't really know why people care about the likes
You sort of get what you give. Reply to those people who need a little help and you'll get some more replies. I try to not use FB as a free therapy session but I don't see anything wrong with the occasional need. I focus on activistim, environmentalism, philosophy, jokes, and geeky/cute pictures. It's pretty random what will get likes but it tends to snowball because of how FB's algorithms work for your friends' feeds.
So, key things:
Reply to other peoples stuff because then your stuff will show up in their feeds more often.
Focus on starting discussions with people who reply to your posts because that will make other people see it in their feed.
The more time I spent on social media the more I realise there is a big difference between how people bahave towards you on FB compared to in real life.
Last week I was commenting in a long discussion thread in a local community group. I made a perfectly reasonable and very logical post, and I got shouted down, with someone saying I am always adding fuel to the fire etc. Quite a few people were shocked about what was said to me....but there are some people who either react very emotionally to things without thinking through what was said properly, and some who just like an argument.
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I do often ''like'' other people's posts or sometimes comment, and if someone comments on one of my posts I either like their comment or I comment back, until it turns into a little conversation. Or I might inbox them if I feel I don't want to discuss too much on my news feed.
I have been unwell with a flu over the week-end, and I announced it on Facebook (as I often see others doing that when they're ill), but nobody commented ''get better soon'' or something like that. It makes me look like I'm a very lonely person who talks to myself on Facebook, while others get a whole load of sympathetic and empathetic replies. I have commented on other people's posts about them being ill. Just last week a colleague of mine has been off work with a bad back, and she put about her back of Facebook, and I put ''aww, hope your back gets better soon hun x''. I've noticed a lot of females call each other ''Hun'' on Facebook. My colleague did ''like'' my comment.
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Female
I tried calling a real friend, a few times a month to actually converse with a real person who was not my brother. She told me to get on facebook and I have never heard from her again. I do not know anyone who showsvup on my page on facebook. Her friends I guess. Facebook seems to me the worst level of hell to throw people that you don't want to talk to.
I think it is a bad place for people who have social communications problems.
I quit it after saying quite a few snarky and mean things. My passive agression having a tantrum. I really don't care much. I know I was mean, honest, and said what was true, but I don't really care if any one is hurt. But I do know that our culture likes only ceramonial honesty. I've never known what the eff was going on.
So I shut down any social media things.
I really feel forced into having friends, and then I feel evil that I have such feelings. Its like, just go away and leave me alone. Seriously, I would feel more at home with a pack of wolves, than "my friends."
I've never posted a "I feel sorry for myself" post since I've never have those moments in my life that I feel depressed.
It's because I'm just an easy person. Example: I never worry about anything, when my best friend moved to another place I never had the idea that the friendship would end, we are still best friends and we even hang out.
However, when I was 12, I posted a lot of statuses from things in my life that annoyed me, I never got any likes either but I didn't really have that much friends.
Nowadays the closes thing to a "I feel sorry for myself" status is one that actually makes sense: 2329857987% of the statuses I post on Facebook are actual stuff that happened in my life, but I always post the funny moments and post it in a totally unserious\sarcastic\funny way. I always get around 3 to 10 likes from the same people, I consider those people my best friends on internet; it are people that I either know from my old schools or internet and even though I never talk to most of the people, they seem to care about me since they read my statuses. I read their statuses as well of course.
Sorry if this post didn't really help, I'm the kind of person who has human emotions, but barely uses most of them, except for the happy and fun ones of course :U
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