A very public anxiety attack

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Ive just walked for 3-4 hours in today's heat so im going to keep this telegraphic:

My deceased grandfather remarried and left the house to his wife of around 2 years (not my grandmother)
My great uncle visits this woman in the house (only one in our family who does this)
I never had an issue with it until I went there and stepped into a house which felt as if it had been occupied by strangers. It was supposed to be a family heirloom but we have no contact with her
We went there for dinner and my anxiety built and built and I was considering leaving and walking the 3 hours home. Dinner was announced and I left without any word due to the mounting anxiety.
My uncle is a total prick when it comes to my AS. He has his phrases that he enunciates smugly "Its all in your head" "Why worry about what you cant change" blardy blardy BS like that. Had I decided to inform him of my plan to leave he would have shrugged off any protestations on my part. "Nonsense" "Behave yourself".
So I left with my name ringing in my ears down the street

So how the f**k do I explain this to a guy who believes that I effectively choose to have AS and associated comorbids. P.s. I love my uncle despite the fuckwittery so I want to stop this turning into a shitstorm. He's respected in the community and this woman and her offspring will spread their version of events around the town with the usual cumulative variation

The anxiety was about more than just the house, it was the total disconnect between the way I remember the house and the way it is now. I didnt even see any pictures of my grandad in the living room. It was surreal in a horrible nightmarish way.

You can't control what others say or do.

Until your uncle demonstrates a willingness to learn and understand, I don't think there is a way for you to explain AS. I guess if you do love him and want him to be more supportive, then you could have a sit-down (one-on-one) and really get it through his head about how his actions/words affect you. Maybe then he'll change his behavior towards you.

Does that make sense?

p.s. I read 'telegraphic' as telepathic...heh XD

Seems to be two issues coming together with the house and your uncle. You did the right thing leaving the house when you did, but maybe the wrong thing by not explaining yourself when you left. At some point you have to face your uncle again. I would tell him you have a sentimental attachment to your grandfather's house and the belongings he left behind and felt so uncomfortable you had to leave when you did. I wouldn't discuss your AS with your uncle as he doesn't understand the situation.