Who here has given up on a social life?

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^^^
join the club. at least we both are in a good place here!

Sure are, I love it here.

My social life is pretty much non-existent. I wish I had people to talk to.

I gave up trying to have a social life in 1980, after I graduated college. I was working in aconvenience store that my dad managed. There were 3 women that were continually calling off. Even if I had plans on my days off, I get the phone call. If I told him I had plans, I was told "F!ck your plans! Get yer goddamned ass in this store or you're fired and yer ass will be living on the street." It got to the point that I no longer made plans to do anything, unless it was to see the doctor. Needless to say, Dad and I got into it several times in the store, with customers present. You can guess who got fired. If it weren't for mom, I would have been living on the street.

I hope your dad eventually saw the light.

I have a habit of keeping people at arm's length, so I never usually get close enough to anyone where socializing happens much. And on the rare occasions I do open up to someone, I screw it up anyway. Yeah, I think I've pretty much given up at this point.

Unfortunately, no. Remember, he's the one that caused me to totally screw up my solo at the night of music my senior year in high school. I looked out in the audience, and I could see it in his eyes saying, "I'm going to make you f!ck up your solo, and then I'll make the biggest jackass out of you the high school has ever seen. He also made snide comments about some of the professors I studied or performed under while in college, right to my and their faces. He'd also make caustic comments about my friends, also right to my and their faces. That's how he got his jollies. And he and mom wondered why I never had any close friends or never got married?

is he still alive?

No. He died in 1986.

do you ever have thoughts that maybe he was shown the error of his ways when he met his maker?

I really couldn't tell you. He and mom were out to visit me in Chicago shortly after I moved there. I moved there in January of 1986, they came out to visit in April of that year. He was diagnosed with cancer of the liver in May, and was dead by the end of August, 2 weeks before his 51st birthday.

if my dad treated me like that I would never be able to forgive him.

The bad thing is that I'm the one that totally went to pieces when he died. If it weren't for the president of the company at the time inviting me up to his mansion and letting me cry on his shoulder, I might not be around today.

to even intense pain there is an end. when my dad died, I was just exhausted.

To have a parent fail you in such a way is one of the worst things that can possibly happen.

My view on people is fairly cynically and my expectations are pretty low as well. I'm to the point in the workplace, where as long as I'm not being: Made fun of, having my work sabotaged, or having nasty rumors spread about me, then I consider things to be ok.

As far as a social life, at age 40 it's just not gonna happen. Thing is, I need low maintenance people in my life. After a week of work, I need alone time to recuperate. It seems most of the people I've attracted in the past have been: Users, Flakes, or overly needy. More or less people who can't get there s*** together.