The Chat Phenomena

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Something I wrote back in 2002, that relates to our interractions on the net, on sites such as this and in chatrooms...some might be able to take something from it.



It often can seem that life crushes those who least deserve it, removing their anchors one by one, removing the remaining dregs of hope from that which they clung to. The hardest thing to face is the fact that, as an onlooker, a face in the distance, there is nothing one can do except sit by observing in a helpless, angry silence. An anger at the injustice of life and it’s expectations. Some might say you cannot help another until you succeed in helping yourself, but as far as I am concerned, that is a pile of crap.

The chat phenomena never ceases to amaze me. People drift in and out, many existing to us for maybe an hour, maybe a day, then vanishing back into the world, leaving behind only a trace on our memory, maybe leaving no imprint at all. Some might as well have never existed. Yet, occasionally, we will find a few who remain in our minds long after they have ceased to visibly exist for us. Their past words, their personalities, their essence will pursue us relentlessly, long after they have left the scene, leaving us feeling bereft, almost cheated. I cannot help but feel that many opportunities are missed in these rooms. We allow the one or two people who might have been on the same wavelength, might have offered something of inherent value, to evade our grasp, then it is too late. They are gone. Gone to such a degree that one might as well be trying to capture the moon or the sun in their hands.

Is this an April Fools joke?

Does it look like a joke to you? Yeah, like I would really write something in 2002 to post as an April Fools Joke in 2007. I find that insulting actually.

That's proof that I don't understand you as a person.

At least you're not mean to me, and I am very happy about that!

I restrained myself. I was upset, but I decided it would not be good for a mod to be nassty about it. To enlighten you, it is a piece of serious writing about the whole internet world where we each come into one another's lives, then leave one another's lives...for example... look at how many once were a part of this forum and were respected and liked by other members..where are they now? And how many care where they are now? It is also about how we might see someone posting or chatting on the internet, and find them interesting and like them, yet our fears can prevent us from doing something about it and talking to them.

Kate, what are you really like?

So, I know you're into Doctor Who and all that, but I'm sure you find something like US Jeopardy! very boring. You do get that in England, I know that.

You don't know how funny Alex Trebek is!

To each your own!

Eh, although I agree that life can crush those who least deserves it, but this is all so very subjective. This person might just be so sensitive that anything maliciously intended sparks suffering in an individual. Yet someone who is much more mentally strong would overlook something like this, and thus this suffering doesn't happen as often, and for long periods of time.....unless its really bad, like some kind of physical catastrophe.


I think conversation can be very different in chatrooms, people let loose and are more comfortable saying things, but in person their attitude, behavior, characteristics can be different. There is much more to a person than just what they can talk about or how they do it, its sacrifice, trust, loyalty, companionship, many things...thus taking so much from a chatroom seems a little too farfeteched to me.

It was not meant to be objective. This is something I simply dug out of my old writings lest anyone found it useful.. I did not post it as a topic for debate, as such. It simply...is.

Thank you for these very true observations, Graelwyn.

I agree w/Jake, original post very nicely put.

Perhaps we're where we are when we need to be and move on/out as those needs change. I don't think all who leave do so because they were offended in some way but instead, they got what they needed and moved on. Unless they gave nothing back while here it can't really be thought of as selfish, just developmental.

Chats give folks a chance to try on different roles before wearing them in public, too... This can be a safe environment for doing that.

I'm a glass-half-full person, as you might guess, but no Pollyanna, I assure you. I just think that energy is like funds in a bank account and one must decide how to spend it, being angry, neutral, positive, etc. There's just so much I'm willing to spend.

That said, I'll walk a mile to avoid an argument but be the first to stand up in defense of anyone being picked on and once injured a fellow who was kicking a dog... having been kicked a bit myself.

So, thanks for the post Graelwyn. Well done.

Best original post I've seen to my memory.

Couldn't possibly have hit the nail harder.