I accidentally kicked someone on the bus

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Joe90
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25 Apr 2018, 12:16 pm

Today I was on a crowded bus on my way to work, and I was sitting on a seat that faced sideways. The sideways seat had a little foothold that was too small for my feet, and as more people got on, I tried to put my feet in a position where they weren't in anyone's way, but while doing so my foot slipped on the foothold and only gently kicked a woman who was squeezing past to find an empty seat (it had been raining so my shoes were wet which was why my foot slipped). I ernestly said sorry to the woman, but judging by her facial expressions I could tell she thought I did it on purpose. Other people were staring at me too, and I felt worried in case everybody might have thought that I kick people and that I'm a bad person. It really was an accident, I didn't mean for my foot to slip. :oops:


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TheAP
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25 Apr 2018, 12:52 pm

Try not to worry about it. You may not ever see those people again, and they will likely forget all about it.



banana247
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25 Apr 2018, 1:38 pm

You know that it was an accident, and you made it known and apologized. You're a polite and caring person!

I know it can feel very awkward to confront mistakes with strangers, even when it's totally not your fault at all, as in your case, but you still spoke up and tried to make right. Many people would have just said nothing and acted like nothing happened... I have been witness to many rude people in public who deny common courtesy and refuse to acknowledge others. As you have also been witness to, it seems that even the person on the receiving end can be at fault in this way.

If other people misjudged you, then that's their problem. Kudos to you for setting a good example!



LaetiBlabla
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25 Apr 2018, 2:20 pm

Joe90
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25 Apr 2018, 5:47 pm

LaetiBlabla wrote:


I got 15 out of 20 right, without taking my time.
Not all Aspies are unable to read facial expressions and body language.


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LaetiBlabla
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26 Apr 2018, 12:38 am

Would it be possible that you sometimes misinterpret the way people look at you in the bus?



Joe90
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26 Apr 2018, 3:49 am

No, I knew the woman took it the wrong way by the way she stared down at her legs where I kicked then frowned and walked off in a grouchy way. It's not bothering me in that way, I just worry whenever a minor error happens to me in public. It's a social anxiety thing. I don't want to explain all the little details.


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AnneOleson
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26 Apr 2018, 1:09 pm

Maybe she looked at her leg and frowned because it hurt. I have fibromyalgia and even a nudge can hurt at times. It wouldn’t matter if it was an accident or deliberate, it would still hurt. She never said anything so it seems like she was neutral. It happened, she moved on.



LaetiBlabla
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26 Apr 2018, 1:27 pm

Maybe people are not angry at you but you interpret their reaction as anger against you because you are anxious in public places.

Obviously, most people in a bus don't care at all if someone hits the foot of another person, would it be by mistake or not. Most of people don't even notice.

Sometimes social anxiety may actually come from the fact that nobody cares. Because you are in the middle of a crowd and you are like alone at the same time.



Joe90
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26 Apr 2018, 3:44 pm

I think it was the way everybody else around me stared too, as if I had caused an assault. But, like others in this thread have said, I'm sure they've all forgotten about it now.


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Summer_Twilight
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26 Apr 2018, 4:09 pm

One time the escalator was closed and the only way out was the elevator which was crowded and I was trying to squeeze in not realizing my actions. I heard a woman firmly tell me "Do not ever push me again," who I apologized to her though she was still mad she said, "That's okay."



LaetiBlabla
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28 Apr 2018, 2:18 am

Joe90 wrote:
I think it was the way everybody else around me stared too, as if I had caused an assault. But, like others in this thread have said, I'm sure they've all forgotten about it now.


In a crowd, nobody look or stare at you, nobody care about you, they ignore you completely, you are alone
and there is nothing bad about it.



kraftiekortie
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28 Apr 2018, 2:21 am

Just apologize if this sort of thing happens.

People understand that these sorts of accidents happen on public transportation.

The other posters were right. You might not see these people again.



Joe90
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28 Apr 2018, 4:45 am

Haven't seen you for a while, kraftie. I'm glad you're still around. I love your posts. :)

But anyway the situation on the bus happened a few days ago and I don't feel so anxious about it any more.


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29 Apr 2018, 1:07 am

I got rammed rather severely by a trolley steered by some lady blabbing away on her phone the other week, she even adjusted her direction after encountering this unimportant object. I span around expecting to violently defend my right to have obtained the last bag of half price caramel cookies from the bakery stand, or for a simple explanation and apology for why I was damn near impaled on the trolley but no, didn't even notice, I almost felt like I had a reason for being offended but not being considered alive by someone so selfish is a positive thing :roll:


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