What do you do if you have no friends? None!

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jimmy m
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17 Dec 2019, 11:46 pm

18 percent of men do not have a close friend and 32 percent have no one they consider to be a best friend. It also cited a news article that said “male bonding is more likely to lower a man’s stress levels than a night out with his partner, or time spent with the family.”



In this case a British man, Mark Gaisford, decided to join a meet-up group at a pub, where men can come together and socialize.

“You’ve got the quiet ones, you’ve got the confident ones, but really good fun. I’m so glad I got off my backside and got a bit of guts and went and did something like that,” he said.

Source: Man's video admitting 'I have no friends' resonates online


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Pepe
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18 Dec 2019, 3:07 am

jimmy m wrote:
18 percent of men do not have a close friend and 32 percent have no one they consider to be a best friend. It also cited a news article that said “male bonding is more likely to lower a man’s stress levels than a night out with his partner, or time spent with the family.”


Do we really need an "in each other's pockets" friendship?
No way do I feel like a "sad lonely git".
I haven't been lonely since I was in my late 20s,
And I think a lot of that had to do with social conditioning/confusion.

I've given up thinking my independence is totally due to my being autistic, since I am definitely not a "normal" aspie,
Even though it seems to be a characteristic of "the aspie".
I think it has a lot to do with age, circumstance and life priorities.

In addition, it is unquestionable that aspies and NTs see the word differently, and as a consequence, some things which apply to NTs don't apply to us,
And for me personally, I generally feel uncomfortable when I am with people for an extended period.
For me, with rare exceptions, I actually prefer my solitude to interaction with a "friend".

"Sad old git"?
I don't think so, Tim. 8)



shortfatbalduglyman
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20 Dec 2019, 3:22 pm

if your goal is to lower your stress level, without friends or romantic relationships:

meditation
counseling
medication
hobby
journal


if you want look up "stress management techniques" online



Pepe
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23 Dec 2019, 6:02 am

shortfatbalduglyman wrote:
if your goal is to lower your stress level, without friends or romantic relationships:

meditation
counseling
medication
hobby
journal


if you want look up "stress management techniques" online


Nah,
Better yet,
Get a puppy. :wink:
Seriously. 8)



shortfatbalduglyman
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23 Dec 2019, 9:13 am

Pepe

Puppies take time money and energy

Some apartments tell residents not to keep pets

Afraid of dogs

Don't want to clean up after the dog


Then what alternative?



Pepe
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23 Dec 2019, 6:18 pm

shortfatbalduglyman wrote:
Pepe

Puppies take time money and energy

Some apartments tell residents not to keep pets

Afraid of dogs

Don't want to clean up after the dog


Then what alternative?


Get a cat?

P1: Each person has a cost/benefit ratio.
P2: Each person is unique,
Ergo,
C: The cost/benefit ratio will be different for each person. 8)

Autistic affinity with "non-judgemental" and "honest" animals is well known.
Not so much affinity when it comes to the hooman kind of beast, however. :wink:



funeralxempire
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24 Dec 2019, 5:51 pm

Drugs.


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Kiprobalhato
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24 Dec 2019, 5:58 pm

drugs stop working, and then you feel worse and are poorer.


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funeralxempire
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24 Dec 2019, 6:03 pm

Kiprobalhato wrote:
drugs stop working, and then you feel worse and are poorer.


They've been working for longer than you've been alive and I'll worry about fording that stream when I finally reach it. :nerdy:


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wsmac
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15 Jan 2020, 9:45 pm

Pepe wrote:

Nah,
Better yet,
Get a puppy. :wink:
Seriously. 8)

hahaha
I know this is a little old, but I was reading around posts and found it.
.
When I went through my divorce, I wound up spending a lot of extra, non-paid time at work. Doing work or just being there doing my own stuff. I could hangout in the office at night, after I got off work and it was quiet. People started telling me I should hang out with friends... but I don't do that well. They started telling me I should get a dog!
I like animals... but I can't take care of them by myself. I get rather anxious when they want something and I can't figure out what it is!
BUT
I got a dog anyway. I found him sitting on a shelf with a lot of other stuffed animals at a toy store. I took him home and named him Bartholemew. Still have him... he hangs out with me on my boat. 8)


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blooiejagwa
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15 Jan 2020, 10:51 pm

Wrong Planet is my 'friends' - better than, as I don't have to bother anyone, nor anyone bother me, unless both want to, and no hard feelings either way. No response = neutral, response = neutral, no bad feelings. Good feelings can come, but the bad feelings never come because the space won't allow for it. Nobody is that way here , maybe a few, but if the majority is non-malicious, that curbs and keeps in line any malicious tendencies of the rest, and everyone benefits.

I don't need or have real actual friends, just acquaintances who once in a while message me and occasionally invite me to a big event, but don't actually treat me like an NT version of a friend. That will never happen and can never happen.

Today, tomorrow, one day, we'll all be dead and none of it will matter, how cool is that! The fact that it's actually not a factor in our end destiny.
It's not the measure of a person, no matter how much NTs believe it is.


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Pepe
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16 Jan 2020, 2:27 am

wsmac wrote:
Pepe wrote:

Nah,
Better yet,
Get a puppy. :wink:
Seriously. 8)

hahaha
I know this is a little old, but I was reading around posts and found it.
.
When I went through my divorce, I wound up spending a lot of extra, non-paid time at work. Doing work or just being there doing my own stuff. I could hangout in the office at night, after I got off work and it was quiet. People started telling me I should hang out with friends... but I don't do that well. They started telling me I should get a dog!
I like animals... but I can't take care of them by myself. I get rather anxious when they want something and I can't figure out what it is!
BUT
I got a dog anyway. I found him sitting on a shelf with a lot of other stuffed animals at a toy store. I took him home and named him Bartholemew. Still have him... he hangs out with me on my boat. 8)


Get a stuffed cat to keep him company.
You could call him: Barthole-meow. :mrgreen:



Pepe
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16 Jan 2020, 2:33 am

blooiejagwa wrote:
Wrong Planet is my 'friends' - better than,


"Google" is my friend.

The problem for me is that I am: "The Oracle of Truth".
Friends expect you to side with them, right or wrong.
An Oracle with any integrity can't do that. :shrug:



Kiprobalhato
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16 Jan 2020, 2:39 am

OP the answer to your question is you spend several decades accumulating massive wealth, influence, buy arms, maybe hire a private army, invade a small island nation (try sark) and establish your own repressive dictatorial state with yourself as emperor and everything from there on is smooth sailing

funeralxempire wrote:
longer than you've been alive


35
-22
_____
= 13

bro


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Teach51
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16 Jan 2020, 4:54 am

Pepe wrote:
wsmac wrote:
Pepe wrote:

Nah,
Better yet,
Get a puppy. :wink:
Seriously. 8)

hahaha
I know this is a little old, but I was reading around posts and found it.
.
When I went through my divorce, I wound up spending a lot of extra, non-paid time at work. Doing work or just being there doing my own stuff. I could hangout in the office at night, after I got off work and it was quiet. People started telling me I should hang out with friends... but I don't do that well. They started telling me I should get a dog!
I like animals... but I can't take care of them by myself. I get rather anxious when they want something and I can't figure out what it is!
BUT
I got a dog anyway. I found him sitting on a shelf with a lot of other stuffed animals at a toy store. I took him home and named him Bartholemew. Still have him... he hangs out with me on my boat. 8)


Get a stuffed cat to keep him company.
You could call him: Barthole-meow. :mrgreen:



Pepe you are definitely todays' mood uplifter :D


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funeralxempire
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16 Jan 2020, 4:54 am

Kiprobalhato wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
longer than you've been alive


35
-22
_____
= 13

bro


Sounds about right. :|


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"If you stick a knife in my back 9 inches and pull it out 6 inches, there's no progress. If you pull it all the way out, that's not progress. The progress is healing the wound that the blow made... and they won't even admit the knife is there." Malcolm X
戦争ではなく戦争と戦う