Just moved, not sure how to meet up with people
Hello, it's been a long time since I looked for advice on here. The last few times I was having trouble with confessing my feelings for a friend I had in the UK (still haven't, and that will likely burden me for a long time to come). I live in New Zealand now, and I've been looking forward to going to this Autism group with weekly meetings instead of the terrible monthly one in the UK, however meetings won't start until February due to Summer Holidays. I fear that I will have to last 2 long months feeling completely alone, a feeling I've had to suffer for over an entire year. I don't want to have to suffer over the holidays if I can help it. Any advice on what else I can do to meet with people?
I actually prefer online friendships and actively avoid people in real life, but you are a young person so forget what I said.
I guess online activity is better than nothing, right?
We are here to help.
Have you tried Meetup.com? (I don't know how widely it's used in New Zealand.)
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- Autistic in NYC - Resources and new ideas for the autistic adult community in the New York City metro area.
- Autistic peer-led groups (via text-based chat, currently) led or facilitated by members of the Autistic Peer Leadership Group.
- My Twitter / "X" (new as of 2021)
Recently I found out there is a formula to use which helps you make friends. Can you imagine how excited I was to find there was a formula to follow? It is:
Positivity+ Consistency+ Vulnerability.
It means, start out being positive to people (don't complain too much, which I was guilty of doing).
Then keep in touch with people (consistency), don't just see them a couple of times then give up (which I did).
Then show a little vulnerability (a little of your personality, problems and thoughts. But don't pour out your problems at the start of the friendship or it scares them off. I was guilty of that)
I now have two friends who I've known for 3 years. After living here for 20 years with no friends! So you can do it!
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That alien woman. On Earth to observe and wonder about homo sapiens.
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