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nocalpoet92
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

Joined: 29 Nov 2015
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 24
Location: Michigan

21 Nov 2021, 5:32 pm

So the past couple of years I have been through quite a bit. I mentioned in another post a couple years ago that I was acting as a caretaker for my grandparents when I was living in California in 2019. Then in August of that year I got a job and moved to the Des Moines area in Iowa. Lived there for a year and didn't make friends. Of course the Coronavirus pandemic complicated things quite a bit. I relocated to the Kansas City area on the Kansas side in January when I changed jobs, as I wasn't happy at my old job. I have lived here for almost a year now and haven't really met anyone. I got friendly with a couple of people in my apartment complex but one of them moved and the other one doesn't talk to me much or want to hang out. I'm 29, going to be 30 in March of 2022, a college graduate, I don't drive, and I work full time from home but the office is in downtown Kansas City Missouri. I have tried church groups and so far that hasn't worked. I am also undiagnosed with ASD. Can anyone offer any tips/advice that I can use in making friends?



Texasmoneyman300
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 25 Feb 2021
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,255
Location: Texas

22 Nov 2021, 4:11 am

nocalpoet92 wrote:
So the past couple of years I have been through quite a bit. I mentioned in another post a couple years ago that I was acting as a caretaker for my grandparents when I was living in California in 2019. Then in August of that year I got a job and moved to the Des Moines area in Iowa. Lived there for a year and didn't make friends. Of course the Coronavirus pandemic complicated things quite a bit. I relocated to the Kansas City area on the Kansas side in January when I changed jobs, as I wasn't happy at my old job. I have lived here for almost a year now and haven't really met anyone. I got friendly with a couple of people in my apartment complex but one of them moved and the other one doesn't talk to me much or want to hang out. I'm 29, going to be 30 in March of 2022, a college graduate, I don't drive, and I work full time from home but the office is in downtown Kansas City Missouri. I have tried church groups and so far that hasn't worked. I am also undiagnosed with ASD. Can anyone offer any tips/advice that I can use in making friends?

Maybe going to starbucks or going out to get soft drinks could help you socialize and meet some people.Or maybe just being somewhere where a bunch of people with a common interest like in public or at fishing pier or meetup groups or hiking.Maybe you could try a job in parts of the country where your church group is strongest or maybe go to sporting events or trivia nights.I would read "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie.Its a very old book....you should be able to get a copy for less than a dollar or even a quarter or even free.

Maybe join toastmasters or maybe try volunteering to serve at a church if you decide to try that again.I would make a point whenever you meet someone to call them by their name frequently because that can really help.You could ask people what kind of hobbies they have.I would let them do most of the talking.Maybe try a bigger church that has more young people.Those things could work.You could volunteer for various philanthropic charities and causes.Maybe try to adopt a hobby that is popular in your area among people who u would like to be friends with.I ask people about the weather and mundane topics in conversation that are not likely to be too confrontational.I would stay out of bars because those are not good places to spend a lot of time



Mona Pereth
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 11 Sep 2018
Gender: Female
Posts: 7,810
Location: New York City (Queens)

23 Nov 2021, 1:00 am

What are your hobbies/interests?

Have you tried looking on Meetup.com for local groups devoted to activities or topics that interest you?


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