Is it possible to steal someone's ideas...

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and not have any deep-seated, secret respect for them?

this guy that i talk to (and sort of, used-to like) kind of ignores me now (i can just tell i've been placed on his back burner) but he's copying my ideas in various ways. i already tried to say something about it but i made it sound like i was joking because it really isn't a big deal and i didn't want to be overly dramatic. it's not like he's copying anything word-for-word... but i find it mildly annoying.
is it possible to steal someone's ideas yet lose enough respect for them to apologize or stop? if i copied someone i know i'd feel a little inferior to them so i don't understand why he's treating me badly and taking my ideas. he doesn't reply to my messages most of the time and i'm ready to give up. he sounds a bit disrespectful, i mean let's just say i don't feel like a pretty, dignified lady when i talk to him. i can't really put a finger on it because i don't think i'm very good at spotting dominant behavior, verbal bullying, etc. What should I do?

I think you should stop sharing your ideas with him.

There are various different types of people in the world who will steal ideas. Some will steal ideas because they don't have any good ones of their own and yes, they do have negative feelings towards the people who's ideas they are stealing.

Others will steal ideas if they think they are good enough because they are sociopaths and just don't care about the effect on the other person one way or another.

And some will steal ideas under the notion that if you didn't move to legally protect your idea (copyright, patent, trademark, etc) then it's fair game to take.

I recall someone once said of Bill Gates, to paraphrase, he's a great guy but don't tell him about any ideas unless you own the legal rights to it (implication: He'll take it and profit off of it).

Seconded.
And also yes, the only reason i can think of for some one to do that is he cant think of any good ideas on his own so he steals the ideas of whoever seams to be the smartest (or otherwise whoever's idea best) and who's he can get. Kind of like a mental parasite.

Last edited by Titangeek on 07 Nov 2010, 12:51 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Unfortunately, rather than him respecting you, it's the opposite. It not that different from him stealing your watch - he can, he does, and he gets away with it. You don't matter to him as a person.

The only solution is to not allow him access to your watch/ideas. Strangely enough, there may be outrage on his part when he first realises that he's being denied access to the goodies.

This is because he's used to the idea of you being a dispensing machine. Think about how people react when they walk up to a dispensing machine and it doesn't dispense. They can't believe it. Then they get angry.

Bear with it. Stand your ground. You know that you're a human being, and a smart one at that. The jerk is just a bully who's been stealing stuff and getting away with it in the past.

Tell him if he don't stop, you'll sue him. Copyright is automatic.

Yes. I think a difficulty for Aspies in a situation like this is that we tend to look to the NTs around us for cues as to how to respond to a situation. If someone has stolen your ideas and moved on, you aren't going to get any useful feedback. Be flattered he thought your ideas were worth stealing and move on yourself. It's unlikely that continuing to try to resolve this will get you any respect from him.

When we learn something, we incorporate it into our own pattern of previous knowledge. This always requires some custom tailoring. Thus, people feel ownership of their new ideas. Even if your contribution is 90% of what someone else is saying, they remember the idea as being born when it first made sense to them, due to some link that only exists in their own head. In China, "intellectual property" is a very foreign concept. Ideas evolve best if they circulate freely, unless nobody can afford to pay for the physical work involved in development, in which case patents, copyright, etc. can squeeze some support from the economic system.
Everyone owes most of their ideas to others. "If I have seen farther than any before me, it is because I stand on the shoulders of giants."
Winston Churchill said that it was pretty easy to get almost anything done if you didn't care who got credit. Perhaps it is enough to see your ideas being promoted by more people.
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"Talent hits a target that nobody else can hit.
Genius hits a target that nobody else can see."