Uncertain about inviting colleagues to lunch?

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Joined: 1 Oct 2017
Age: 49
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,082
Location: Australia

06 Nov 2017, 5:16 am

So I'm normally pretty OK with the social skills but this one blindsided me, and I'd appreciate some input.

I've been working for the govt on contract and applied for a permanent position and this morning I got a call saying I'd got the job. Yay! I was really excited and straight away I told the 2 guys who work in the same pod.

So after congratulating me one of them is saying something about treating me lunch, and then he's joking with the other guy asking when he was going to treat me lunch and the other joked that he'd buy us all lobster at the best restaurant nearby but not til 22nd December (when we're all off on leave).

Anyway, I'm sitting there smiling at their jokes but thinking it should be me who treats them to lunch and not the other way around, and I thought maybe they were expecting me to ask, but I wasn't sure. And I wanted to ask them for lunch, but I was also trying to think if I could afford it because I just paid a lot of money for some training courses. So basically I couldn't get my head together and I went all silent and then went back to work and kind of ignored them.

Anyway, now I've had time to sort myself out, I'm thinking I will ask them straight up tomorrow morning whether I can take them out to lunch to celebrate. Actually the cost is not a big deal, it was just that I'd been feeling a bit grouchy at that moment about having to pay so much for training. And now I'm thinking that quite likely we will all go out for lunch but end up splitting the bill anyway - it's just that I need to ask them first, and not the other way around. Does that sound like I've read the situation right?

They're probably going to think I don't really want to and am only asking to be polite, because at first I was so distant and am only asking the next day. So I might just need to come straight out and explain that I was a little confused and feeling overwhelmed at getting the job, and that I really do want to treat them lunch. (Which is true, because they're good pod-mates and I feel bad that I don't talk to them much, and I want to share my happiness at getting the job).

Any input on whether I read things right, and what I should do?