Does your autism make it hard to relate to your generation?

Page 2 of 2 [ 20 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2

NINfan
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 23 Jun 2025
Gender: Female
Posts: 62
Location: Scotland

18 Jul 2025, 11:05 am

Canadian Freedom Lover wrote:
I have always been attracted to older people,


I used to be like you when I was a teenager. I did have a few friends my age but found that I had better conversations with their parents than I did with my friends.
But nowadays I seem to enjoy younger friends because people my age are usually at a stage in life I simply do not understand.


_________________
Live life like a crow:
-Collect shiny things
-Do a sassy walk for no apparent reason
-Scream if you're having fun
-Trust your intuition
-Be playful


buttercreamkiss915
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

Joined: 18 Jul 2025
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 3
Location: Pennsylvania, USA

18 Jul 2025, 9:26 pm

Yes, absolutely. I look at myself and then I look at others in my generation and age group and I just don't seem to understand or get them



VioletKnight
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 26 May 2025
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 44

Yesterday, 12:03 am

I do have a hard time relating to my generation, but I think it has more to do with how I was raised and the fact that I'm technically "between" generations. My birthdate can fall under Millennial or Gen Z depending on where you look and I don't relate all that well to either of them. There are some things I can relate to with other people that are also near that divide but, unfortunately, there's too much I just can't relate to with anybody anywhere in either generation and I'm fairly certain it's mostly because of how much time I spent with my great grandparents, and to some extent my parents, when I was very young. When my parents were at work my siblings and I were at my great grandparent's house. I didn't spend much time with other kids my own age. None even lived nearby enough to try to spend time with. So my formative years were spent mostly absorbing the culture (is this the right word?) of my great grandparent's and my parent's generations rather than my own generations'. For the most part the shows and films I watched, the music I listened to, the books I read, the mannerisms and language I observed, were theirs rather than my peers'. And that created a pretty big chasm between me and other kids my own age from very early on. I'm sure my autism contributed to that chasm as well, but not as much as my lack of exposure to the interests and trends of my own generations.



Mona Pereth
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 11 Sep 2018
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,712
Location: New York City (Queens)

Yesterday, 7:23 pm

Canadian Freedom Lover wrote:
Sort answer: YES!

Long answer:

I have never related to people my own age. I have always been attracted to older people, many of my friends are the same age as my parents or older.

When I was in my twenties and thirties, most of my friends were 10 to 20 years older than me. (Not quite my parents' age, though. My parents were about 40 years older than me.)

Canadian Freedom Lover wrote:
I have been told that I have mature interests, not very many people in their 20's are interested in political activisim, history, philosophy, or just plain old thinking.

I had similar interests in my twenties, and intermittently throughout my adult life.

As for political activism, it was my impression that there are plenty of young people interested in political activism these days. But perhaps not your particular flavor of political activism?

Canadian Freedom Lover wrote:
Also, I think most people under the age of 35 or even 40 are shallow, entitled, and stupid.

I too disliked most people in my age group when I was young. I still do not feel that I would be compatible with the vast majority of people.

Canadian Freedom Lover wrote:
Which is the main reason why don't hang out with young people, and more Importantly why I don't have a girlfriend. It is hard to meet young women when everyone you know and converse with are 50+, unless someone sets you up with their daughter or granddaughter hahaha.

Have you ever made a point of seeking out the specific subset of younger people who share your interests? For example, a quick Google search just now led me to something called the Young Philosophers Society. Dunno if this is quite your cup of tea, but, if it isn't, perhaps you might be able to search systematically something closer to what you want, if you have not done so already?

Canadian Freedom Lover wrote:
I'm hoping that as I get older it will become easier to make friends closer to my own age. I'm on the precipice of my 30's, so we see if my prediction is correct.

In all likelihood you will never cease to feel alienated from the vast majority of people in your own age group, although your perception of the reasons for that alienation will likely change (and perhaps get a little less self-congratulatory?) over time.

So, instead of waiting, it would probably be better to search more systematically for groups of young people who share your interests and values, at least to some extent if not totally.


_________________
- Autistic in NYC - Resources and new ideas for the autistic adult community in the New York City metro area.
- Autistic peer-led groups (via text-based chat, currently) led or facilitated by members of the Autistic Peer Leadership Group.