irishwhistle wrote:
b9 wrote:
as soon as i become tired with a person's company, i exit it.
if i am out in the wider public, then i will tell them that i must go home and they will not challenge me.
if they are at my place, then i tell them they must go home. they will also not challenge me.
i do not let myself get tired of people beyond a limited threshold i have in my mind.
i tell then (when i have thought "over and out") that i am finished with the talk.
i let them know i am tired of them, and if they persist to try to talk to me, then they are trespassing on my consciousness in a way.
i do not react well to people insisting on my attention when i am not ready to give it.
i do not get exhausted by people because they can not consume me.
irishwhistle wrote:
Then I guess my question is, do any of them ever try to talk to you again?
yes they do.
they are not offended by it because they know i am different, and they know i am that way with everybody and not just them.
all of my friends (i have not many) are pushy, and they have barged through my wall i have between me and the world. when i first meet people, i am mostly rude to them but not in an insulting way. i just indicate that i can not think properly by waving my hand in front of my face for example, and i walk off while they are talking.
some people are intrigued, and they "push" to get to know me, and i will often like to talk to those people.
after some days or weeks, they eventually want to come over to my place and i tell them no, but they keep persisting even though i say i prefer to be alone.
so sometimes i let them come to my place if i am feeling "scintillating" (i.e: when have a "scintilla" of interest in being in company).
i am generally a pompous type of person, and i narrate what i am doing as i go about my affairs while they just sit there and witness.
after a while, i can not be bothered to vocalize what i am thinking, and i tell them i am tired of talking. they are not surprised at what i say, because they saw me in that same demeanor from the first time they laid eyes on me.
they do not think i dislike them or anything when i am tired of them. i never hold any residual feeling like a "grudge" for example, and every one that knows me knows that i am a "minute by minute" person and i do not think in terms of past or future to any real degree.
irishwhistle wrote:
Because I've been that abrupt with people in the past, believe me, and they generally don't trouble me after that. Ever. And they let others know.
people like that would not want to know me in the first place. i am not very courteous from the outset (not deliberately).
"people" as you describe would like people who are not like the initial impression they would get from me.
most average people like "niceness" and "agreeableness". if you pretend to be nice and agreeable just to get a friend, and you know that they will sometime soon see your true colors, then you should expect that they will freak out i would suspect. to shock someone is not good.
but pushy friends who will not let you escape despite your rudest treatment of them are very good friends.
"rude" is not malicious, and it is not that ugly.
i am not well thought out tonight so sorry for the "illoquence" of this post.
irishwhistle wrote:
So it's really a "burning your bridges behind you" approach to socializing.
no it is not that. it is just ensuring that "closing times" are respected.
irishwhistle wrote:
As much as I dream of doing it sometimes, I think a lot of people really would regard it as being a tad extreme. And still another difficulty has always been that the really annoying people don't take the hint. Even if you look them in the face and tell them to go away.
well the people who i demand to get out are the people who ignore my requirements and remain beyond my toleration.
i am not rude to any of my friends except one who is very passionate and possibly a latent schizophrenic (he is into conspiracy theories (chem trails spreading government engineered swine flu for instance))).
with my normal friends, i just stop listening to them when i want them to go. i may swivel my chair toward the computer screen, and i disengage from them and start to study things i do not describe to them.
they realize in a passive way they are past their "use by" hour, and they generally leave and ring me up the next week when they know i will be ready to see them again.
they are never surprised because they knew i was the way i am when they first met me.
19 Jun 2009, 8:56 am
