Are you unintentionally disrespectful to people?
RoisinDubh
Deinonychus
Joined: 24 Jan 2009
Age: 55
Gender: Female
Posts: 341
Location: Somewhere else entirely
gina-ghettoprincess
Veteran
Joined: 8 Nov 2008
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,669
Location: The Town That Time Forgot (UK)
I treat all people as equals. The same rule applies to everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, be they a teacher, a homeless person, or the Queen of England. The rule is that if you're nice to me, I'll be nice to you. Simple.
But in society, you're not supposed to treat all people as human beings, you're supposed to automatically give certain people a certain amount of respect.
_________________
'El reloj, no avanza
y yo quiero ir a verte,
La clase, no acaba
y es como un semestre"
I try to be respectful, but sometimes I can be a little mean without knowing it. But compared to most people I'm not too bad, I at least TRY to be respectful
_________________
The scientist only imposes two things, namely truth and sincerity, imposes them upon himself and upon other scientists - Erwin Schrodinger
Member of the WP Strident Atheists
i'm not sure. a lot of people accuse me of being disrespectful when it wasn't my intention. i'm not always sure what's appropriate to mention and what not. my general rule: if it happened, or if it's an honest opinion--i'm not sure why i shouldn't mention it.
my observation: at times, this gets some people in an uproar. often i notice the uproar (and that it's directed at me.) but i'm not sure what i said that tipped it off. sometimes i'm aware that what i've just said has been found offensive--but i'm just not sure why.
sometimes i'm intentionally disrespectful--a habit i'm working on changing. not sure that has to do with "different wiring" in my case. think it has to do with my anger.
i'm not sure that NT's are wired to be respectful, or that those with "alternative wiring" are going to be disrespectful out of hand. it's an interesting thing to think about, though. glad this topic was posted.
_________________
punctuation... life is full of punctuation.
But in society, you're not supposed to treat all people as human beings, you're supposed to automatically give certain people a certain amount of respect.
I tend to treat people all the same too, as equals. I guess at times, in this world, THAT is considered a sign of "disrespect" as I don´t automatically give some people more importance than others.
_________________
"death is the road to awe"
I'm great at getting the wrong answer out first
I dont do it deliberately i just kind of tell the truth,people have told me in the past ive insulted them,but i didnt know i was doing it.
This was before the FD,now im comfortable with my honesty and try to remember that when asked anything
Kind of goes against the grain so its kind of hard to remember most of the time
Yes, especially since there are alot of particular things to follow in my culture, like greeting parents' friends as aunt or uncle and kissing them and their kids on the cheek, and putting an elders' hand to your forehead out of respect. It makes me uncomfortable and I don't like doing those things.
I believe neurotypical people are wired to be respectful to others. We are not. That is what makes it so difficult.
Don't treat other people in way you would not want to be treated. Being disrespectful is just plain Bad Manners. You don't have to love your fellow man, just try being polite to him, whenever possible and practical.
ruveyn
i am called "discourteous" many times, and "disrespectful" sometimes.
normal people are like guided missiles that intelligently change their directory given updates on the "target's" whereabouts.
i am like a dumb artillery shell, and my trajectory is "set in concrete" from the time i am fired.
so when i walk into a bakery shop for example, i already know every word i intend to say whilst in there.
woman: hi!! ! how are you today??? (gushing)
me: yes i will have one curried chicken pie and 1 lamington and one custard tart thankyou
woman : (goes mute and fill's the order)
me: thank you. (after i pay and then i exit the shop)
my life outside of my home is a script that i must follow.
before i interact with anyone, i must know what i am going to say from start to finish.
if they throw a "spanner in the works" by saying something i did not expect, i will grind on with my script anyway, and their spanner will be pulverized in the inevitable churning of my pre defined scripted machinery.
i have been "disrespectful" (as i was told) without intending to be on many occasions.
example:
there is an indian man at work (when i go there) who is very timid and concerned with
how australians perceive him because he feels that australians look down on him because he is very black and stuff like that.
i had to make a phone call to optus (one of the 2 major internet providers in australia) to find out the reason for an issue i had, and i was on the phone for about 40 mins listening to ads about how good optus is with customer service etc.
when the call was answered, it was answered by someone in india, and they were rude and did not care in the slightest about my predicament.
him: hello sir i am #@^*&!^*^&*^# (i did not catch his polysyllabic name). how can i help you today?
me: yes good afternoon. our office is not able to connect to the internet at the moment and i wonder if there is a local "outage" happening in our area (post code 2164) , or is it some corruption of our configuration that has caused it?.
him: well sir from time to time we experience drop outs and so that may be your problem.
me: so can you check if there was a drop out in the area 2164?
him: no sir i can not at this time, and thank you for your call.
i was enraged. i started into a tirade about indian help desks, and i was eventually stopped by my boss who came behind me and pulled some of my hair and she said that i should respect that there are indians in the office and to shut up now.
i shutted up, but that was an example of disrespect she said afterward.
i do not know mush about "respect" or the lack of it.
Don't treat other people in way you would not want to be treated. Being disrespectful is just plain Bad Manners. You don't have to love your fellow man, just try being polite to him, whenever possible and practical.
ruveyn
I would never treat someone in a way in which I myself would not want to be treated. Unfortunately, people get offended by many things that don´t offend me, so it´s often just hard to tell when I´m offending someone in some way.
_________________
"death is the road to awe"
how australians perceive him because he feels that australians look down on him because he is very black and stuff like that.
i had to make a phone call to optus (one of the 2 major internet providers in australia) to find out the reason for an issue i had, and i was on the phone for about 40 mins listening to ads about how good optus is with customer service etc.
when the call was answered, it was answered by someone in india, and they were rude and did not care in the slightest about my predicament.
him: hello sir i am #@^*&!^*^&*^# (i did not catch his polysyllabic name). how can i help you today?
me: yes good afternoon. our office is not able to connect to the internet at the moment and i wonder if there is a local "outage" happening in our area (post code 2164) , or is it some corruption of our configuration that has caused it?.
him: well sir from time to time we experience drop outs and so that may be your problem.
me: so can you check if there was a drop out in the area 2164?
him: no sir i can not at this time, and thank you for your call.
i was enraged. i started into a tirade about indian help desks, and i was eventually stopped by my boss who came behind me and pulled some of my hair and she said that i should respect that there are indians in the office and to shut up now.
i shutted up, but that was an example of disrespect she said afterward.
i do not know mush about "respect" or the lack of it.
Eh, I would've blown up too, I hate those automatic voice menus or Indian help desks. Dammit give me a human I can talk to!
Last night one of my online friends thought I didn't care about him because he wanted me to give him my other friend's sn because she is a female and he wants other females to talk to also. Well I went to my female online friend and asked her if she likes talking to diaper men because I felt it wouldn't be polite to give him her sn so that's why I had to ask and when she said no, I went back to him and told him she doesn't talk to diaper men. So I asked him what was I supposed to do? I also told him I didn't feel it be polite to give him her sn so that's why I had to ask because lot of diaper females don't talk to diaper men and they ignore them when they get a IM from them or a PM. Then he told me I made him sound like a creep because "diaper men" is too stereotype and it makes the good ones sound creepy when they are not and him and I had been talking for six years. Well I didn't know how else to phrase it to my female friend then.
I have also hurt this guy friend a few other times on accident but he always comes back.
Similar Topics | |
---|---|
What do people expect people of a certain age to look like? |
29 Feb 2024, 9:19 pm |
How to comfort people |
07 Feb 2024, 2:06 am |
How Many People Are Here These Days? |
18 Apr 2024, 12:50 pm |
Do They Think People Are Thick? |
21 Feb 2024, 5:40 pm |