First time in history!! !! The NT/AS open hotline ! !! !! !

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1986
Deinonychus
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29 Mar 2021, 9:38 pm

Quote:
Sorry this is a very delayed response and I'm not even sure if you are still with us?

I was responding to a very specific question about NTs being cruel in the teenage years. If and when it happens then the group psychology tends to make them behave in a manner that often they wouldn't do as individuals.

There's a book we had to read in school called "Lord of the flies" by William Golding. It essentially about small boys who find themselves lost on an island by themselves after the adults died after a plane crash. Its how these innocent boys became brutal and sadistic when forming a group and left to their own devices. This concept has been repeated many times over the years in television dramas. Kind of an innocence lost.

But does this happen all the time? definitely not. However when you approach a group there will be some form of thing you have to demonstrate to be accepted by the group. For some groups it's not much, for others it will take plenty of convincing. Often it never happens.

I don't quite remember why I made that comment, but I think I had been reading not just that reply but several of yours. I think what struck me was that, as a person on the spectrum, putting in the effort to "getting into" the NT-world in general, with all its social challenges, manipulations, unwritten rules and occasional rewards just seems like a huge challenge, and I wonder if I'm not better off with the limited time I have in life to pursue other things that better suit my temperament, like photography, language, travel, etc.


_________________
Diagnosed AS 2012.


JustFoundHere
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31 Mar 2021, 2:21 pm

JustFoundHere wrote:
Seeking NT perspectives experienced with healthy NT/AS friendships, relationships:

The more I've read, and participated here on WP, the more I sense that it has become a self-fulfilling prophecy to believe that NTs (even those NTs experienced with the Autism Spectrum e.g., HFA) cannot connect with those adults on the Autism Spectrum. This can best be described as a "self defeating prophecy." This must and can change!

The more I acknowledge, post, and offer fresh insights proven helpful regarding the Autism Spectrum here on WP, the more I feel that I'm engaging in those increasingly futile rituals of semantic hair-spilling, and linguistic gymnastics. In short, I (and quite a few WP members) are tired of "spinning our wheels!"

Granted, WP can yield impressions of a confusing environment for both NTs and those of us on the Autism Spectrum alike.

Enclosed are (LINKS) which might offer some starting points to "break the ice" - perhaps a small-start of a potential sea change- which might be ripe to occur. Hence dispelling the myth that NTs cannot connect with people on the spectrum.

What can be in the best interests of NTs and people on the spectrum alike.

In a nutshell, to invite that much needed (less confusing) dynamic here on WP!

I look forward to feedback from those awesome NTs!

LINKS:

For NTs:
viewtopic.php?t=395573

Can Creating Art "Break The Ice" - Encouraging Friendships?:
viewtopic.php?t=395602


Any thoughts on above content??



JustFoundHere
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03 Apr 2021, 1:33 pm

JustFoundHere wrote:
JustFoundHere wrote:
Seeking NT perspectives experienced with healthy NT/AS friendships, relationships:

The more I've read, and participated here on WP, the more I sense that it has become a self-fulfilling prophecy to believe that NTs (even those NTs experienced with the Autism Spectrum e.g., HFA) cannot connect with those adults on the Autism Spectrum. This can best be described as a "self defeating prophecy." This must and can change!

The more I acknowledge, post, and offer fresh insights proven helpful regarding the Autism Spectrum here on WP, the more I feel that I'm engaging in those increasingly futile rituals of semantic hair-spilling, and linguistic gymnastics. In short, I (and quite a few WP members) are tired of "spinning our wheels!"

Granted, WP can yield impressions of a confusing environment for both NTs and those of us on the Autism Spectrum alike.

Enclosed are (LINKS) which might offer some starting points to "break the ice" - perhaps a small-start of a potential sea change- which might be ripe to occur. Hence dispelling the myth that NTs cannot connect with people on the spectrum.

What can be in the best interests of NTs and people on the spectrum alike.

In a nutshell, to invite that much needed (less confusing) dynamic here on WP!

I look forward to feedback from those awesome NTs!

LINKS:

For NTs:
viewtopic.php?t=395573

Can Creating Art "Break The Ice" - Encouraging Friendships?:
viewtopic.php?t=395602


Any thoughts on above content??


Being 'The NT/AS Open Hotline' - is this the place to ask those hard questions (and receive much needed answers) regarding those verrrrry important reasons why we must encourage, nudge, motivate adults on the Autism Spectrum to develop those trusting AS/NT friendships?

One reason to boost initiatives in developing AS/NT friendships: What about the names of people to list on forms asking 'who to contact in case of emergency?'?

Let's post those stories of important AS/NT friendship experiences - hence to develop that collective wisdom here on WP (here in the.........'The NT/AS Open Hotline' thread) - to encourage those AS/NT friendships.

I must be very outspoken here on WP esp. in this discussion thread; I'm concerned that 'The NT/AS Open Hotline' is not living-up to it's potential; hence, we might just be doing a huge disservice to both adults on the Autism Spectrum, as well as those NTs concerned with the Autism Spectrum.



Gael
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21 May 2021, 4:09 am

Oooh this looks fun.

Do you notice even the mildest of aspies, do they seem not right to you even if they're really subtle???



cyberdad
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21 May 2021, 4:57 am

Gael wrote:
Oooh this looks fun.

Do you notice even the mildest of aspies, do they seem not right to you even if they're really subtle???


Hmmm that's not very nice



Cuppacoffee
Butterfly
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Joined: 8 Jun 2021
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Posts: 10

08 Jun 2021, 4:51 pm

1986 wrote:
Quote:
Sorry this is a very delayed response and I'm not even sure if you are still with us?

I was responding to a very specific question about NTs being cruel in the teenage years. If and when it happens then the group psychology tends to make them behave in a manner that often they wouldn't do as individuals.

There's a book we had to read in school called "Lord of the flies" by William Golding. It essentially about small boys who find themselves lost on an island by themselves after the adults died after a plane crash. Its how these innocent boys became brutal and sadistic when forming a group and left to their own devices. This concept has been repeated many times over the years in television dramas. Kind of an innocence lost.

But does this happen all the time? definitely not. However when you approach a group there will be some form of thing you have to demonstrate to be accepted by the group. For some groups it's not much, for others it will take plenty of convincing. Often it never happens.

I don't quite remember why I made that comment, but I think I had been reading not just that reply but several of yours. I think what struck me was that, as a person on the spectrum, putting in the effort to "getting into" the NT-world in general, with all its social challenges, manipulations, unwritten rules and occasional rewards just seems like a huge challenge, and I wonder if I'm not better off with the limited time I have in life to pursue other things that better suit my temperament, like photography, language, travel, etc.


Wow! I'm new here trying to figure out if my son sits on the spectrum (which has been suggested) or if it's something else.
We experienced the Lord of the Flies effect in a major way in our previous neighbourhood!
I let the kids come and play in ones and twos, sometimes loads of them, and it worked OK. But come the holidays they turned feral. They'd swear, fight, chase my son en-masse. When we ignored knock-knock-run it turned to stones being thrown at our windows.
It may be a natural progression, but should not be allowed to happen. I can't believe so many parents chose to turn a blind eye to what was going on. :evil: