Who else feels cheated out of a normal childhood?

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I feel cheated out of a normal life in general.

I definitely felt cheated out of a normal childhood. No friends, abusive family, abusive kids at school, hostile education environment, etc. On top of that I was sexually assaulted multiple times in middle school, and frequently tortured (I don't know what else to call it). I didn't have much of a childhood.

I did have a pretty normal adolescence, but I can thank theater and artsy weird teenage friends.

I wasn't cheated out of a normal childhood, in fact apart from the daily arguments with my mother it was almost enjoyable. I couldn't relate to anyone my own age but I didn't care, I paid too much attention to my pets and my obsessions to notice that I was alone.

I was however cheated out of a normal adolescence and I suspect that it had more to do with my depression than my AS, or a combination of both. Now I'm starting to think that I'm getting cheated out of a normal whole life. Just when things seem to be going well something goes wrong and it all gets destroyed.

The problem with the word cheat, is it implies a conscious actor conning you into a slight. You can only cheat yourself, you were the one who lived your childhood. It is normal for people to live their own life, even if they live their own life by choosing to let others live it for them. You are the one who chooses what you are attached to. If you choose to be attached to transient things that can be taken from you, it is your own fault that you feel suffering for the lack of those things due to being attached. If you accepted them as good while they were present and enjoyed them fully, and then accepted them as gone as is the way of all transient things, you would have had no cause to suffer. You choose your own sufferings.

Sora, I totally relate to this. I was extremely happy living in my own world for most of my childhood. I had a few friends, but the friendships always felt sort of labored to me. I think I was more friends with these people because my parents encouraged it. I never really felt relaxed, though, when I was at a friend's house. I was much better off in my room, singing into a tape recorder for hours on end.

It was weird, though. In 11th grade, it's as if someone flipped a switch and then I suddenly had a whole host of friends. They were special-interest-related friends as it turned out (music). I could almost feel the fog of the rest of the world lifting during those years. I had suddenly discovered my extraverted side.

I agree with this totally, but I would like to add something to the OP (and others):

Normal is overrated. The idea of what someone should be, rather than who we are, is what causes autistics to think that there's something wrong. The other thing that you have to understand is that it's not who you are that makes you unhappy, it's fighting who you are. Be who you are, and you will be free.

Edit: By the way, this presents another advantage and disadvantage of autism. We don't feel the need to follow the norm naturally, so we can reject it easier. However, we must fight who we are more than neurotypicals in order to follow the norm. Thus, we can be happy much more easily, but we also have much more stress when we feel the need to follow the norm.

Wow! I just realized today that I might have AS I´m 35 and all of my life I kept thinking that everything was going to get better (relationships, friends, girlfriends etc..) when I grew up, now I´m in my second marriage I have one dauther from my first one and one dautgher from my actual marriage Plus two (Son and Dauther) thar are from my wife´s first marriage.

As I was reading all the posts in this section I almost cried because I saw myself in every other post.

In my case I was the young boy with all the answers with few friends and with visits to special education institute back and forth (special ed said nothing wrong with me, school said FIX HIM!! !).

After painful primary school whent to militay High-school and had no much time to worry about relationships (all boys institute) but after finishing and going to college everything came crumbling down.

nowdays I´m amazed that I have been able to acomplish this much having this disability and now I understand why I feel like trapped inside of myself.

Does anyone knows a therapy for adult AS's?

thank you all for your posts I fell Like a need a Hug now

Lifehood topic

I know we have never had dialogue, but what you wrote touched a nerve. Is it possible for you to find your child who was adopted out?

Some people who are without children may "adopt" others or to join some sort of group in order to have a sort of family bond, different from a biological family but it is one of choice and often is much more enriching than one composed of relatives.

You may already be involved in the above. Just a thought from me, as I do not know you well.

I feel I had a normal childhood considering who I am and where I came from.

oh i was cheated but i don't know if i can blame it on AS. my mother was very abusive to me and my sisters. i wouldn't have had a normal childhood either way.

i don't always act my age. one of the things i collect is hello kitty stuff and that gets some snarky comments. sometimes i complain that if michael jackson was allowed to have his childhood as an adult, i should be allowed to, too. after all i'm only a little bit of an adult. five years ago i was definitely considered a child.

Yes but just as much due to my insane mother than the spectrum thing. Feel cheated out of a normal adulthood yes.

Whenever I think about something like this, whether I should hold someone responsible for my situation or self loathing, it's just hard to invoke any emotion. I just don't know if or what I'm missing out on. I can't picture myself being different. I wouldn't be me then.