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mikeyb
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16 Jul 2009, 8:49 pm

Ok hi I am 19.

I don't feel like typing paragraphs so I will explain myself like this:

Very Paranoid.
Very sensitive to sound and visuals. My heart pounds when I hear a sudden bang, or just general sounds.
Have an extreme amount of anxiety.
Very depressed.
Repeatr random words and conversations in my head. When I read something I repeat the words in my head.
No visual hallucinations, no auditory hallucinations.
Wierd thoughts sometimes, kept repeating F*** someone in my head randomly my freshman year.
Was very abused, can't live with myself, thoughts of suicide.
I am very obsessive and nit pick over little things.
Outerbody experiences sometimes, don't feel human.
Bad eye contact.
bad social skills.
no empathy.
trichotimillia since 10 years old.

So can anyone pin point what I have? Sorry for this writing style. Thanks!



AceOfSpades
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16 Jul 2009, 9:01 pm

I'm not a psychologist, but sounds like AS with anxiety and depression issues. Definitely not schizo cuz you're not hallucinating or delusional.



buryuntime
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16 Jul 2009, 9:01 pm

mikeyb wrote:
Ok hi I am 19.

I don't feel like typing paragraphs so I will explain myself like this:

Very Paranoid.
Very sensitive to sound and visuals. My heart pounds when I hear a sudden bang, or just general sounds.
Have an extreme amount of anxiety.
Very depressed.
Repeatr random words and conversations in my head. When I read something I repeat the words in my head.
No visual hallucinations, no auditory hallucinations.
Wierd thoughts sometimes, kept repeating F*** someone in my head randomly my freshman year.
Was very abused, can't live with myself, thoughts of suicide.
I am very obsessive and nit pick over little things.
Outerbody experiences sometimes, don't feel human.
Bad eye contact.

So can anyone pin point what I have? Sorry for this writing style. Thanks!

You mentioned NOTHING about your social abilities or difficulties, despite lack of eye contact.

Answer these, if these fit you you should check out Asperger's:

- Strict routine, upset with change or new things
- Can't sustain conversation, especially small talk
- Limited or "special" interest, something you overfocus on more than a "normal" interest.
- Stimming. (rocking, hand flapping, excessive pacing, self injury like headbanging, etc)
- Can not read facial expressions, misinterpret others often.


Paranoia, depression, and anxiety have nothing to do with Asperger's other than possibly a co-morbid. Also, you didn't mention any delusional behavior or hallucinations. You don't sound schizophrenic either. Mood disorder(s) and a depersonalization disorder sound more accurate from your description. You should get therapy if you were abused.

EDIT: Thanks for the post edit. x_x



OddDuckNash99
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16 Jul 2009, 9:05 pm

You cannot have schizophrenia if you don't have some sort of psychotic symptom (delusions and/or hallucinations). As you have said that you don't have hallucinations, and since you didn't list any delusions, it is highly, highly unlikely that you have schizophrenia. If I were you, I'd look into Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. What jumped out at me is that you keep hearing the "F" word in your head over and over again. I have pure obsessional OCD, and before I started the medication Anafranil last year, this was an obsession that I'd get daily. Plus, you said that you are "very obsessive about things," and you have trich, which is an Obsessive-Compulsive Spectrum Disorder (OCSD). You very well may have AS, too. It is possible to have both (I have both). As Buryuntime said, you left out some key AS symptoms in your description, so it's hard for me to really say if you should go to a doctor and get evaluated for AS. But you definitely need to check out OCD some more, I'd say. Feel free to ask me any questions, if need be.
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mikeyb
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16 Jul 2009, 9:45 pm

Thank you very much guys for your answers! I am so paranoid that I was Schizo, but It is probably likely not that. Also to add to my problems:

Same routines (always on computer)
Very obsessed over things over a period of time
I go thru certain phases when I think I have some kind of disorder. (paranoia)
No history of Schizo in the family.
I think my dad is AS.


Lately my mood is getting worse, I think it is because I stopped St Johns Wort. Not sure tho. Thank you guys for your answers and glad to know that you are all so helpful!

BTW what are delusions? I'll tell you if I experience them or not. Thanks guys!



OddDuckNash99
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16 Jul 2009, 10:05 pm

Delusions are false beliefs that the afflicted person believes are true, despite no evidence for it to be true. Common categories of delusions are paranoid and grandiose ones, the latter being very common in bipolar I mania. A common paranoid delusion that a schizophrenic person may have is that aliens are putting thoughts into their head, via radio waves.

And did you think you were schizophrenic because you get odd/disgusting thoughts in your mind that you can't control? Thoughts that you know your own mind is thinking, but that are things you know you would never want to think? If so, this further points to OCD. Lots of OCD-ers think that they're "going crazy." I did when I first started having intrusive thoughts.
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Last edited by OddDuckNash99 on 16 Jul 2009, 10:07 pm, edited 1 time in total.

exhausted
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16 Jul 2009, 10:05 pm

hi---

delusions are odd beliefs that people hold despite all evidence to the contrary. a paranoid delusion might be something like, "there is a group of people who follow me and monitor me and who would like to do me harm." (John Nash, the mathematician upon whose life "a beautiful mind" is based believed that the government was following him.)

a non-paranoid delusion might be something like: robots really have emotions and can talk to me--or something like that.

i don't know if that gives you an idea. (ex psych-major here, ex therapy client, etc.)


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mikeyb
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16 Jul 2009, 10:09 pm

Okay yeah I am definitely not Delusional then lol! If I do have delusions they would be minor just due to my bad social skills, like not being able to tell if someone is lying to me or not.

Quote:
Thoughts that you know your own mind is thinking, but that are things you know you would never want to think?

^This follows my thoughts of lately to a pulse!



carltcwc
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16 Jul 2009, 11:38 pm

hi mikey. im dxed with comorbid aspergers and schizoaffective and most these symptoms sound nothing like mine. since you said you were abused im guessing you have ptsd. abuse does not cause aspergers or schizophrenia. these symptoms sound like ptsd. possibly comorbid with aspergers, but only if the asperger symptoms have always be present. you also likely have ocd and depersonalization disorder.



pekkla
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17 Jul 2009, 12:38 am

I would agree that it sounds like you could have PTSD. I remember reading some of your posts a week or so ago, and it sounds like you have a pretty bad family situation. I'm sorry that you were abused and hope things get better for you. Don't put up with any crap.



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17 Jul 2009, 3:57 pm

I experienced a very similar period in a boarding high school. Obsessions, paranoias, deppression, anxiety. I was so alone (was living in a room with 3 boys of the same age 8O) that I eventually started to talk to myself, sleeptalking etc. Just like you I was wondering what was wrong with me and a newspaper article about schizophrenia led me to a very wrong answer. I assumed myself as a schizophrenic for 5 years! It was like I was deliberately trying to become a schizo. I realized I wasnt one when I spent a year with a real schizo (another sad story) in the university dorm.

The best advice I can give to you is to visit a psychiatrist as soon as possible and talk to your parents about your problem openly. Suspending your collage for a year can help too. Otherwise dealing with your HUGE problems by yourself will be very painful and most aspies like me tend to follow this hard route.