help understanding autistic behaviors

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We have a nephew who has severe classic autism. He also has MR and is bi-polar. I'm trying to understand some of the things he do and how we can prevent them. I know a lot of people who post here are high functioning autistic or has AS, so maybe I can get some advice. He is about 10 years old and has a lot of behavior problems. One of which is throwing things out the window. He constantly throws tv remotes out the window. He also throws plates or glass cups. He can be very dangerous at times. Is this for attention? Is he bored? Does he get sensory input of of this? He's mostly non-verbal but has began to say one worded sentences about his wants or needs but nowhere near explaining his actions. Any info would be greatly appreciated.

I doubt that he's trying to upset you, probably just trying to communicate feelings he has but doesn't know how to get it through to you. I would suggest getting a wooden bowl for your coffee table and put about 6-remotes in it, not your good ones, just for him,retrieve them later as you straighten up the house. I bought a large wooden bowl second hand at goodwill store. Any second hand store should have one. Buy old remotes from second hand store too. My son is 20 now and I get him to tell me why he did things when he was younger, he was a very anxiuos child. He tells me he did whatever he thought he could get away with, discipline didn't work well for him, he didn't understand it much and was very stubborn. He is verbal and high functioning but maybe the thought processes are similar. We had to remove his bedroom door a couple of times. Once we found the medications that worked for him and I took him out of school in 5th grade he settled down alot! He is smart but he doesn't work or drive and he's 20 now. His only friends are online, but he is happier now. I hope you figure out what works for you. I would be glad to answer questions if I can help in any way. I'm glad y'all are trying to find out as much as you can.

I'd say using plastic plates, glasses etc. are a good idea. At least if he throws them at the ground they lave less of a chance of breaking dangeriously. There are nice looking ones out there, I think with a quick internet search you'd find a nice set/sets. I don't understand the behaviours though. I agree about the remotes, a bowl of useless ones on the table may work.

My younger son is nonverbal and has done some of dose things before. It realy depends on whats going on before he begains throwing things for the why of it. If he's laughing it's just a great joke that noone else gets but him. If he's been told no and is ticked off it's more of a suck on that mom. He use to stand on chairs and step laders and drop light bulbs and other glass odds and ends because breaking them fulled some need of his he was intralled while he did it. What realy helped this behovior when it was for fun or sensory input was to get him busy with other things like a sand table, exercise ball, a big bucket of rice and dried beans and those little jelly like balls are great and can be taken anywear in his pockets. We even made a rain stick out of a empty tube with a lid and put rice,dried pastas and bits of tin foil to get the right sounds for him. He stills throws things when he's mad now and then but it's no longer the all day breaking of glass. We also talk to him even if he never talks back when he does something that he shouldn't we tell him why he shouldn't do that and what he can do if he's bored or upset that would be ok lik if you want to thow things lets go outside and throw this ball. It's not ok to hit a person but it is ok to hit a pillow. We also make a point of never speeking down to him it pisses him off and I can't at all blame him it would piss me off to. Jake also has less bad behavoir if he's able to get out to play and swing. I hope some of this helps if you ever want to ask me anything or need anything that I might beable to help with please feel free to contact me.

My son is mild Aspergers so I don't know if my information will be useful or not, but maybe things to consider.

With him, I can usually tell the difference between behaviors that he enjoys for their calming effect, and behaviors that are caused by stress, by looking at his eyes. His whole demeanor is different. But I've had the benefit of verbal feedback from him to know which is which. For him, the more alive his eyes are, the more likely it is that he is overly agitated and responding accordingly.

Now, interestingly enough, my son has been known to intentionally play games with the TV remotes, specifically, and that is because he has a very strong aversion to the TV. He feels that the TV is a power thats draws him in whether he wants it to or not. While there are times he has enjoyed watching something on TV (he likes Friday family movie nights), other times he feels that it has stolen him from doing something else that he would enjoy or benefit from more. And he resents it. If he has no interest in what is on, so that it doesn' draw him in, then he finds the presence of the sights and sounds to be literally painful to his senses; I can see the stress growing in him. He honestly would be happier if that object left our home forever. So, it is worth some consideration as to whether or not the child has an aversion to the particular object, and trying to be respectful of that.

On the other hand, some autistics are simply fascinated by the act of throwing and / or breaking. I remember once reading about a job counselor who placed an autistic with a breaking glass obsession in a job at a recycling plant, where he got to throw the glass into the bin all day long. Apparently, a match made in heaven. So, it could be something about the visuals or the sound, as well.

Unfortunately, I have no way to help you figure out which it is for this one child.

Meanwhile, try some of the suggestions, above, and also see what happens if you cut back on the amount of TV in the home. I can see a huge difference in my son if he isn't subject to that object; he becomes noticably happier and calmer. If that is a factor, you may see some clues.

Good luck.

Thanks for everybody's advice. He's not my child and doesn't live with me so unfortunately I can't get his grandmother (who watches him most of the time) to buy paper plates. She decorates her house with very fragile things. She is an older lady with old habits so I don't think she will change for him, she will try to discipline him, but it doesn't work. I just feel bad for my husband's side of the family and want to help out as much as possible. Another unfortunate thing is that he only sees his father every other week and his mother works so no one can really toss the ball around with him. Before he does these things he's usually walking around the kitchen table over and over again. He's probably bored and likes the noise and feeling he gets when he does it like the previous poster said. Again thanks for the advice.

I don't know if this is how he is feeling, but for me I get in a similar, I guess mood. It's like all these emotional energy is locked inside and I have no way to show it. I get this overwhelming urge to break something when I repeatedly fail at communicating a point, but feel perfectly fine afterwords. It's a little alarming to my neighbors until I explain why I'm doing it, but I buy those super cheap dish sets at walmart or pick some up at the DI and smash a dish or two when I get like this on the porch or in a plastic tub I have set aside for it. No one gets hurt, and it gets rid of all that pent up frustration. Also cleaning up the mess is kind of calming, and I got a real kick out of catching my fiance doing the same after a particularly bad day at work once. When he noticed me watching he grinned and said "I so get it now".

It might be a good idea to provide him with something he can break, and make it really clear that only that thing is allowed to be broken. Keep his breakables in a special box and when you notice him getting that restless, let him get it out. BTW I recommend safety glasses just in case, especially because since he's a kid he's shorter and closer to debris.