Page 2 of 2 [ 29 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2

Reesie
Butterfly
Butterfly

User avatar

Joined: 12 Aug 2009
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 12
Location: N.C.

16 Aug 2009, 8:32 am

My boyfriend of nearly nine months is HFA, and though we have our times when we don't understand each other as much as we would like, we try to be patient with one another; Especially I with him, I understand his mind works differently than my own and I always try not to take things personally when he is unsure of how to comfort me. But I must say, without a doubt he is the sweetest and most caring guy I've ever met/been with and I really can't/don't want to picture myself with anyone else. :)



castalia24
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 11 Aug 2009
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 8

16 Aug 2009, 9:51 am

Just in the vein of sharing along, my boyfriend of just about 3 months has AS, and contrary to any and all expectations and assumptions, it has been a positive factor in our relationship rather than a hindrance or burden. His methodical and intense approach to life and his world have been a source of strength ofr both me personally and us as a unit. I find the idea of being with someone so dedicated to knowledge, and insightful observation very appealing and also quite inspiring.

It does help of course that there is a possibility I myself have a mild form of AS, though I hesitate to claim that firmly as yet.



SectorStar
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 25 May 2009
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 104
Location: Roseburg, Oregon

02 Sep 2011, 2:21 pm

Reesie wrote:
My boyfriend of nearly nine months is HFA, and though we have our times when we don't understand each other as much as we would like, we try to be patient with one another; Especially I with him, I understand his mind works differently than my own and I always try not to take things personally when he is unsure of how to comfort me. But I must say, without a doubt he is the sweetest and most caring guy I've ever met/been with and I really can't/don't want to picture myself with anyone else. :)


Wow.....I'm sorry for bumping a 2 year old thread....but I had no idea she ever made an account on this site...and quite frankly I'm disgusted with what I just read and can't keep quiet. It's rather ironic how she said that, but then got pregnant a week after our 2 year anniversary last december with someone else's twins. The same person that supposedly "molested" her months before, but now I have my doubts about. The last thing I ever heard from her was an email in april saying that her cervix was opening and one of her twins was malnourished and may need surgery. Tells me she has two potentially life threatening things and left me in the dark after that, never heard from her again. The only reason I even know shes alive is because I saw on the baby daddy's facebook that she had the twins 3 months early in june (wasn't due till sept). Let's see, you had twins when you have no job or high school diploma, your dad is in and out of jail once a week and pretty much not in your life anymore, your mom doesn't have a lot of money and has constant health problems, and the guy that got you pregnant constatly gets in fights and smokes pot. What a great family to be born into! Just goes to show how someone you think would care and die for you can change in a heartbeat....



Grisha
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Oct 2009
Age: 57
Gender: Male
Posts: 8,336
Location: LA-ish

02 Sep 2011, 2:44 pm

SectorStar wrote:
Reesie wrote:
My boyfriend of nearly nine months is HFA, and though we have our times when we don't understand each other as much as we would like, we try to be patient with one another; Especially I with him, I understand his mind works differently than my own and I always try not to take things personally when he is unsure of how to comfort me. But I must say, without a doubt he is the sweetest and most caring guy I've ever met/been with and I really can't/don't want to picture myself with anyone else. :)


Wow.....I'm sorry for bumping a 2 year old thread....but I had no idea she ever made an account on this site...and quite frankly I'm disgusted with what I just read and can't keep quiet. It's rather ironic how she said that, but then got pregnant a week after our 2 year anniversary last december with someone else's twins. The same person that supposedly "molested" her months before, but now I have my doubts about. The last thing I ever heard from her was an email in april saying that her cervix was opening and one of her twins was malnourished and may need surgery. Tells me she has two potentially life threatening things and left me in the dark after that, never heard from her again. The only reason I even know shes alive is because I saw on the baby daddy's facebook that she had the twins 3 months early in june (wasn't due till sept). Let's see, you had twins when you have no job or high school diploma, your dad is in and out of jail once a week and pretty much not in your life anymore, your mom doesn't have a lot of money and has constant health problems, and the guy that got you pregnant constatly gets in fights and smokes pot. What a great family to be born into! Just goes to show how someone you think would care and die for you can change in a heartbeat....


Woah, sorry to hear that.

But on the bright side, it looks like you dodged a bullet - at least her problems aren't your problems...



TeaEarlGreyHot
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jul 2010
Age: 40
Gender: Female
Posts: 28,982
Location: California

02 Sep 2011, 4:39 pm

SectorStar wrote:
Reesie wrote:
My boyfriend of nearly nine months is HFA, and though we have our times when we don't understand each other as much as we would like, we try to be patient with one another; Especially I with him, I understand his mind works differently than my own and I always try not to take things personally when he is unsure of how to comfort me. But I must say, without a doubt he is the sweetest and most caring guy I've ever met/been with and I really can't/don't want to picture myself with anyone else. :)


Wow.....I'm sorry for bumping a 2 year old thread....but I had no idea she ever made an account on this site...and quite frankly I'm disgusted with what I just read and can't keep quiet. It's rather ironic how she said that, but then got pregnant a week after our 2 year anniversary last december with someone else's twins. The same person that supposedly "molested" her months before, but now I have my doubts about. The last thing I ever heard from her was an email in april saying that her cervix was opening and one of her twins was malnourished and may need surgery. Tells me she has two potentially life threatening things and left me in the dark after that, never heard from her again. The only reason I even know shes alive is because I saw on the baby daddy's facebook that she had the twins 3 months early in june (wasn't due till sept). Let's see, you had twins when you have no job or high school diploma, your dad is in and out of jail once a week and pretty much not in your life anymore, your mom doesn't have a lot of money and has constant health problems, and the guy that got you pregnant constatly gets in fights and smokes pot. What a great family to be born into! Just goes to show how someone you think would care and die for you can change in a heartbeat....


What does her mother and father have to do with any of this?

*makes mental note* I'm a bad catch because my parents suck.


_________________
Still looking for that blue jean baby queen, prettiest girl I've ever seen.


ntgrl
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 22 Sep 2009
Age: 51
Gender: Female
Posts: 155

02 Sep 2011, 8:14 pm

DITZY72 wrote:
It's not hard to love them. People with Asperger's are incredibly loveable.... It's not wanting to choke them that's hard. LOL. When they pull away and ignore you... for what seems to you no apparent reason.... and they are unable to tell you why they are pulling away etc. It's hard to understand because even though they are very honest they aren't always the most forth coming with communication you need to know what is going on and not feel left out, ignored etc.


+1
However as a side note after visiting an SPD forum I can tell you it seriously could be worse!!



SectorStar
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 25 May 2009
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 104
Location: Roseburg, Oregon

03 Sep 2011, 12:32 am

TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
SectorStar wrote:

What does her mother and father have to do with any of this?

*makes mental note* I'm a bad catch because my parents suck.


The fact that neither of them will probably be around to help her. Her dad being out of her life pretty much, and her mom has bad enough health problems to where I doubt she'll be around for a long time.



TeaEarlGreyHot
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jul 2010
Age: 40
Gender: Female
Posts: 28,982
Location: California

03 Sep 2011, 12:39 am

SectorStar wrote:
TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:

What does her mother and father have to do with any of this?

*makes mental note* I'm a bad catch because my parents suck.


The fact that neither of them will probably be around to help her. Her dad being out of her life pretty much, and her mom has bad enough health problems to where I doubt she'll be around for a long time.


So? I'm a single mother of two and neither of my parents are in the picture. I hardly think this makes me a bad catch.


_________________
Still looking for that blue jean baby queen, prettiest girl I've ever seen.


SectorStar
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 25 May 2009
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 104
Location: Roseburg, Oregon

03 Sep 2011, 12:59 am

But do you have a job and or a high school diploma/GED? Thats what really draws the line.



TeaEarlGreyHot
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jul 2010
Age: 40
Gender: Female
Posts: 28,982
Location: California

03 Sep 2011, 1:14 am

SectorStar wrote:
But do you have a job and or a high school diploma/GED? Thats what really draws the line.


:roll:


_________________
Still looking for that blue jean baby queen, prettiest girl I've ever seen.


SectorStar
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 25 May 2009
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 104
Location: Roseburg, Oregon

03 Sep 2011, 1:22 am

I'm not trying to compare her to you, I know theres people that can be single and have 2 or more kids and be well off/happy in life. But her problem is with no diploma, that pretty much guarantees your not going to find anything above minim wage in this economy right now, (if anything at all) which probably isn't enough to live off of and raise 2 kids right now. And shes not even trying, she drooped out of high school in 10th grade because she "just didn't feel like going". And thats pretty much the same excuse she gave me for not attending her GED classes as well.



nick007
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 May 2010
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,059
Location: was Louisiana but now Vermont in the police state called USA

03 Sep 2011, 3:46 am

SectorStar wrote:
I'm not trying to compare her to you, I know theres people that can be single and have 2 or more kids and be well off/happy in life. But her problem is with no diploma, that pretty much guarantees your not going to find anything above minim wage in this economy right now, (if anything at all) which probably isn't enough to live off of and raise 2 kids right now. And shes not even trying, she drooped out of high school in 10th grade because she "just didn't feel like going". And thats pretty much the same excuse she gave me for not attending her GED classes as well.

Her salutation may not be due to her being lazy. Having a high-school diploma or not will make no difference with her employment situation unless she goes on to further education. I have a high-school diploma & my status on employment applications is exactly the same as someone who doesn't even have a GED. They ask if I have any college degrees, licenses or trade school. Diplomas & GEDs are not mentioned on employment applications at all so my high-school diploma is completely worthless sense I never went on to further education due to learning disabilities. It's probably better for her not to work sense she has two kids because she will likely only be able to make little more than minimum-wage unless she gets something better than a high-school diploma & if she would have to pay for daycare to watch the kids while she works; she may actually lose money by working.


_________________
"I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!"
~King Of The Hill


"Hear all, trust nothing"
~Ferengi Rule Of Acquisition #190
https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Ru ... cquisition


HopeGrows
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Nov 2009
Age: 49
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,565
Location: In exactly the right place at exactly the right time.

03 Sep 2011, 11:11 am

Michjo wrote:
Most aspies tend to meet the criteria for narcissistic personality disorder (Abliet they meet the criteria for different reasons than a narcissist). It's kind of hard to love a narcissist :wink:


Wow - another sweeping generalization that does more harm than good. I dated an Aspie not too long ago who fit the criteria for narcissistic personality disorder perfectly. But that had nothing to do with him being Aspie, and everything to do with a host of underlying psychological problems. The Aspie man I'm involved with now meets absolutely none of the criteria for narcissistic personality disorder - he's a gem.


_________________
What you feel is what you are and what you are is beautiful...