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pekkla
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05 Aug 2009, 1:08 am

If there is one thing I do not like, and have never really understood, its how to compete. I don't have a desire to win games that I'm playing, and I don't know how to set up a game plan or an "agenda" to get what I want. It isn't that I mind winning. I get excited when my daughter's soccer team wins, I was excited when Obama won the election last year, but I do not put myself in competitve situations. I don't like "selling" myself. Is this an aspie trait? Does anyone else out there feel this way?



Acacia
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05 Aug 2009, 1:13 am

I hate the personal and social aspect of competition, because it doesn't make any sense to me.
I occasionally enjoy intellectual, objective competition.

So:

If I were in competition with another employee at work for a big raise, I'd be a total mess.

If I feel vicariously competitive when the Colts win a game, then I'm just fine.


I think that AS complicates the social side of competition, and has a tendency to make the whole thing seem confusing and irrelevant.


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spacedog
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05 Aug 2009, 1:24 am

I have never understood this. I am happy when everyone does well. I never care if i quote win. I only want everyone to enjoy themselves whether it be a game or activity. Competiton has never been a motivator. I try to do my best everytime. So this competition thing seems strange if you are a self motivater like myself.


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05 Aug 2009, 1:34 am

I used to be incredibly competitive about academic scores. I think if I were on a larger team at work, I'd be competitive too (though I can't really compete with my line manager - we are a very small team!). And I've enjoyed a little competitive gaming in the past, online. But I can't get excited about competitive sports, though I do follow the Tour de France.


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anxiety25
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05 Aug 2009, 1:43 am

My son and I, I think, have always been... well, not so much competitive, but very quick to prove our point about intellectual things or facts.

As far as sports, jobs, competing about making friends and all that... either they want to give us the position, want to be our friend... or they don't. That is all there is to it. Neither of us are big on competing, but I think that could be because it takes VERY good social skills to win the approval of another. We just aren't motivated enough to work that hard, and don't get the rules to it anyway. Either we are liked and will earn the extras because we do what we are supposed to, or we just don't get it.



Batz
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05 Aug 2009, 1:50 am

I've never liked competition unless it was for an intellectual pursuit. I mean sports? How's that going to benefit me in life besides giving me exercise? I could do aerobics for that.

Writing? Now there's something to compete for.



nara44
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05 Aug 2009, 2:16 am

pekkla wrote:
If there is one thing I do not like, and have never really understood, its how to compete. I don't have a desire to win games that I'm playing, and I don't know how to set up a game plan or an "agenda" to get what I want. It isn't that I mind winning. I get excited when my daughter's soccer team wins, I was excited when Obama won the election last year, but I do not put myself in competitve situations. I don't like "selling" myself. Is this an aspie trait? Does anyone else out there feel this way?



i think it is an aspie trait as i also got a lot of comments on my lack of interest in competing
NT usually assign such behavior to laziness,innocence ,snobbery or a bunch of other contradicting labels but to me it sits very well with our other so called traits which basically express our ability to perceives reality as an integrated mufti dimensional "thing"
some AS maybe very ambitious as the try to compensate for their lack of social status or visibility but i find that many AS simply doesn't understand the concept of loosing and winning and to me this is very nice and endearing property that makes us better persons than the average NT
i think many of us been bullied because the NT around us were afraid we are winning in area they couldn't do well as us such as science,art and tech while all we were doing is persuing our interests



rainbowbutterfly
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05 Aug 2009, 4:19 am

I love to compete in videogames and arcade games, especially when I'm able to concentrate. I can't compete in team sports because I react too slow and I tend to flinch from balls a little too easily. Also, I don't think that I stand much of a chance in any other form of competition.



Dragonfly_Dreams
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05 Aug 2009, 9:10 am

The only forms of competition I like are the type where someone says, "Did you know that XYZ happened in 1912 and blah blah" and I raise an eyebrow and say, "No it didn't. It wasn't in 1912. It was in 1932." and an argument and "discussion" ensue until I eventually look it up and 99.9% of the time am correct in my answer.

I'm not sure if that counts as competition. Though I do know NT's view it as such. Personally I see it as an absolute. THIS is fact, what you are saying is not. The end. Sometimes I'm wrong, and I learn something new and I don't mind that at all. But when I'm right, I will defend the truth. And my passionate for it looks a lot like competition.

Games, sports, and other competitive things like that... nope. Never liked them at all. Stay clear of them. I've always hated them my entire life. Gym and sports in school were things I was forced to do, and I hated every minute of it. Even playing tag on the playground was too competitive for me. I got frustrated and easily upset when I couldn't accomplish "the goal" of the game. And I didn't take the teasing afterwards well either. I was always picked last. LOL



devey
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05 Aug 2009, 9:48 am

I'm not a naturally competitive person over most things, but in sports matches I'm usually really determined to win. But I'm not a bad loser and I never gloat after winning.



ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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05 Aug 2009, 11:18 am

I don't like competing at all. I'm not a very competitive person, in general.



ChangelingGirl
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05 Aug 2009, 2:54 pm

I don't really seek out competition, but it's not really that I hate it either. It depends ont he situation. I mean, I am awfully clusmy, so I hate competitive sports. However, I did enjoy the debating contests I participated in in high school.



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05 Aug 2009, 5:49 pm

I hate competition; it makes me nervous.
Competition gives rise to conflict, since everyone is competing for things that the others want, so people get more picky about social skills and who they like.



zen_mistress
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05 Aug 2009, 5:52 pm

I do enjoy competing in something I am good in. But I dont really like the whole "winner/loser" thing. If I win I sort of wont accept I am better than others, I prefer situations where everyone wins.


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05 Aug 2009, 6:03 pm

I've never been competitive either. To me the whole idea is to make yourself look and feel better and other(s) look bad. What's the good in that? When you win something you hardly ever get real praise anyway, the others always wish they had won instead then you feel guilty for winning. I usually do things because I want to and enjoy the process, not to win.



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05 Aug 2009, 6:39 pm

I was a skateboard racer for about 4 years, despite having a lack of interest in competition. I had a friend who started doing it, and all the non-racing aspects of it looked attractive to me, such as having friends to travel with and possibly, opportunities for meeting females. Most of my friends who did it were married so, I certainly didn't face competition in that department. When my friends became too busy with having families, and our local mega-skatepark closed, it all started to collapse. I stopped racing, yet still enjoy doing the training that I developed for the sport, as it keeps me physically fit and feels good.


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Last edited by Flismflop on 05 Aug 2009, 7:12 pm, edited 1 time in total.