Did your parents try to take away hobbies?
My mother thought that my interest in Transformers was unhealthy. I would kiss the TV anytime Starscream was on the screen. I had a transformer (given to me by granny for christmas) but it was given away after my 3-year-old brother (at the time) broke the plastic piece that attached the microscope barrel to the rest of Perceptor and then I got mad and mother said "You care more about that toy than your own brother!"
The next year, sometime in November, I went up to granny's like I usually did. She was about to go to town and had a box that was clearly a Transformer. It was Astrotrain. I asked why she was going into town and why she had Astrotrain there, and she said that mother had asked her what I was getting from her for Christmas, and when Granny told her, mother told her to take it back. So she did.
Mother also tried to prevent me from watching Transformers. At one point it was on at 4:30 AM so I'd get up to watch it in secret. Mom only caught me a couple times but that didn't prevent me from doing it again and again.
When Transformers went off the air, I started writing what would be called "Fanfic" today. Mom found some and took it away, burning one of them and hiding the rest. I found two, intact. I had a set of Milton Bradley cards with screenshots from the Transformers cartoon on them. I don't know where those went, all I know is mother took them away.
In 2000, we got internets. We had a computer since 1994 but we just never got hooked up to the net before. And if I looked up anything related to transformers, mother would become furious and criticize me, calling the people I was talking to on message boards about TFs weird like me.
She doesn't try to prevent me from searching and reading about Transformers anymore, but she still criticizes me for it. She actually said she wanted to send me to therapy to CURE me of any interest in toys and cartoons. She said she doesn't understand me and wishes I'd develop more 'adult interests'. Lately she said I have too much stuff (my room is a bit cluttered and there are several TF toys on display and two doll houses) and said, as she has said before, that they should raise my rent because I have too much stuff...apparently in the belief that having to spend more on rent means I'll have less to spend on Transformers and stuff. And yet my collection is quite small, as far as TFs are concerned. I have more Beany Babies than I have Transformers!
wow, interesting story of yours. I voted "Yes, totally repressed it, took things away, forbade"
It happend when I was 14 years old and my parents strike my room and took away all of my special interest which was my whole world by then. I understand them today as it was something provoking and made them worry but by then it was one of my biggest traumas of my childhood which took me massive amount of years to get over...
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hi
It happend when I was 14 years old and my parents strike my room and took away all of my special interest which was my whole world by then. I understand them today as it was something provoking and made them worry but by then it was one of my biggest traumas of my childhood which took me massive amount of years to get over...
Yes, and I bet it made your interest even stronger, didn't it? Absolutely the wrong thing to do to an AS child.
Exactly! it certainly did. I felt just as erased as my special interest. I developed the smartest ways I could find to keep it in secret, just as you. I was caught from time to time but I did continue with it as it was the "only I had"...it was really hard years to remember. It took many many years before I could talk to my mum about all this. When we did she said that she in later years felt that she should have done everything diffrent and not give me such a big trauma as the strike was. But by then she was so stressed and worried and didnt knew what to do, kinda acted in panic and frustration and trying to desperately find a solution to something that was about to derail totally....but it just derailed even more....
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hi
Last edited by xalepax on 07 Sep 2009, 2:59 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Exactly! it certainly did. I felt just as erased as my special interest. I developed the smartest ways I could find to keep it in secret, just as you. I was caught from time to time but I did continue with it as it was the "only I had"...it was really hard years to remember. It took many many years before I could talk to my mum about all this. When we did she said that she in later years felt that she should have done everything diffrent and not give me such a big trauma as the strike was. But by then she was so stressed and worried and didnt knew what to do, kinda acted in panic and frustration and trying to desperately find a solution to something that was about to derail totally....but it just derailed even more....
what was your special interest if I may ask?
SpongeBobRocksMao
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Absolutely! I had to rebuild my porn collection from scratch at least a dozen times. Parents just don't understand.
Heh when it comes to pr0n NTs have the same problem
Btw, welcome to the forum! I see your are new here and I hope you will have a good time here. The issue of this thread is important and interesting to bring on. I hope more people will reply.
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hi
Last edited by xalepax on 07 Sep 2009, 4:30 pm, edited 1 time in total.
LOL @ Willard
I have a hard time saying whether my mother was supportive or not. she seemed largely disinterested unless it effected her. at 14-15 I worked a part time job so I could have a horse. horses had been a ten year obsession, from what my mother said, and one I took up after I found out dinosaurs were extinct.
my mother showed up when I competed at country fair and acted all proud and took pictures, but when I got stranded trying to get home from the stable in a snowstorm because public transportation was on snow routes, she refused to come and pick me up. luckily the lady who had let me in her house (the only house for about 1/2 mile) to use her phone let me spend the night, otherwise I would have frozen to death or had to walk to the highway to hitchhike, which I'm sure other parents don't want their teenage daughters to do but which mine didn't care about because it saved her from being bothered.
financial problems made me lose the horse when my mother decided I should pay rent or move out. I was about 16. that was the end of getting to do anything equestrian.
When I was in middle and high school I was absolutely obsessed with Sailormoon, and declared myself to be Sailor Saturn My mom thought that I was getting way into it and losing touch with reality because I spent so much of my time doing Sailormoon-related things (watching the anime, reading the manga, cosplaying, playing RPGs, collecting trading cards, etc) but she didn't forbid me from it. My dad didn't care. If I had been forbidden... my world would have ended right there!
I have a hard time saying whether my mother was supportive or not. she seemed largely disinterested unless it effected her. at 14-15 I worked a part time job so I could have a horse. horses had been a ten year obsession, from what my mother said, and one I took up after I found out dinosaurs were extinct.
my mother showed up when I competed at country fair and acted all proud and took pictures, but when I got stranded trying to get home from the stable in a snowstorm because public transportation was on snow routes, she refused to come and pick me up. luckily the lady who had let me in her house (the only house for about 1/2 mile) to use her phone let me spend the night, otherwise I would have frozen to death or had to walk to the highway to hitchhike, which I'm sure other parents don't want their teenage daughters to do but which mine didn't care about because it saved her from being bothered.
financial problems made me lose the horse when my mother decided I should pay rent or move out. I was about 16. that was the end of getting to do anything equestrian.
Refused to come and pick you up? WTF? Was she being an idiot, or was she just incompetent driving in the snow?
My parents a lot of times used "parental veto" to keep me from buying things, even with my own money. Or they simply refused to provide the necessary help for projects. A lot of times they would only let me pursue an interest so far. Like they'd buy me a few basic things for the hobby, but then when I wanted to expand it, they'd refuse to let me get any more, so my interest would die on the vine. Then later they'd be like, "You never played with the ones you already had!" Well the reason I never played with it was because I didn't have enough to make it interesting. . .
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Heart of the guardian, way of the warden, path of the exile.
I was an obsessive reader. (Actually, still am.) At one point I'd read the same book over and over and over again... Variously it was The Hobbit, novels by Dickens, Leon Garfield, some Shakespeare plays, different books basically.
When I was going through my hobbit phase, my Mum took the book off me. (Same thing happened when I was reading the Narnian tales.) I don't think she was happy about fantasy.
To be fair, I could still recite huge chunks of the hobbit off by heart... at one point I think I could have recited over half the book without struggling, and with prompting could probably have managed the rest.
My way round this was to indulge another fascination of mine... languages. I bought a copy of the Hobbit in French, and started reading it when I was about twelve. Okay, my pronunciation was atrocious, but it really did introduce me to a much larger vocabulary than most twelve year old English speakers have in French. And because I read it through so many times, I learned lots of nouns in the correct gender, the correct form of adjectives, adverbs, etc. And if I wanted to cheat and write an impressively grammatical sentence, I'd crib from a line I remembered from the French translation.
My pronunciation did eventually improve however, when I later went to work in France..
I also bought the Hobbit in Russian and German, with similar results. And I've learned that when I'm learning a language, a good way to rapidly aquire vocabulary is to get a copy of the Bible in that language, and start reading it. Nowadays you can find online spoken versions of the Bible in any language, so I'll read the text, while listening along, and it helps me build up fluency very quickly indeed.
But I still remember how bad I felt when I got home and my books had been stripped off the shelves, and the lightbulb taken from my room. The word is "gutted."
Oh... the other thing I remember was being forbidden to watch star trek. And when I was old enough to earn my own money, and started buying the star trek videos, my father removed them all, and would dole them out to me one a week.
Makes me really, really appreciate how lucky I was not to be raised in a hive of NTs. Interests and hobbies were expected and accepted in my house. The parents can't very well have a problem with the kids doing what they also do! They didn't always understand me but also didn't think they must.
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