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malya2006
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08 Sep 2009, 1:49 am

My 5 year old son's attention is completely gone lately. What causes this to get worse? Is it lack of sleep, food, stress, what??! I'm just trying to find some sort of correlation and have some understanding. It just seems like there are times when I ask him to do something once and he at least responds, even though he doesn't get up right away. Now it's like I have to practically help him do things he normally does on his own, toileting, dressing, he even needs a little push going up the stairs. It's kinda like he's in slllllllooooooooooowwwwww motion and his mind is else where. Is it just part of the ups and downs of autism or is something triggering it? Any advice?



schleppenheimer
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08 Sep 2009, 10:38 am

I kind of think this is just part of the ups and downs of autism.

There are days when my son is SO SPACY, and there really isn't much you can do to improve the situation. It's VERY frustrating. I used to say when my son was your son's age (he's now 13), that whatever I taught him, it may take 10 times to teach a neurotypical kids, but it takes 100 times to teach a kid on the spectrum how to do something. This is still the same. Just when I think he has the hang of something, he forgets it, and we have to reiterate the same thing over and over again. He's plenty smart -- he just can't remember the tiny details of life if they don't interest him.



sgrannel
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08 Sep 2009, 10:43 am

I've experienced this spaciness a lot, and it was at its worst when I was in my teens/early 20s. I think it has to do with wearing down the capacity to interact with other people. Having to explain myself especially makes me tired, and having all the attention focused on me for more than 1/2 hour makes me want to fall asleep! Even now, I need a break from people if I start to act spacy, but after a day or so I'm good as new.

When I'm working, having people around focusing their attention on me slows me down a lot. If left by myself, I can work very quickly, using methods I make up on the spot, which I don't have to explain to anyone. If there are other people around, part of my thought process is devoted to "How am I going to explain how I'm doing this and that I'm doing it right?" In the end, it's the result that matters, and as long as they're happy with that, who cares how I got there?


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ddrfr33k
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09 Sep 2009, 10:11 pm

i randomly have moments where I space out and forget what I was going to do. Case in point: I work at the food court in my local target. I had one of those space moments, and I realized I was in the process of doing something, but couldn't remember what. I continued with something at hand to get my train of thought moving again. I went back to the kitchen to go do the time and temp logs, and noticed that I had left the sink running and it was draining into the other sink. It happens spontaneously, without warning, and that's part of life. When someone gets my attention, I usually snap out of it.

To be fair, the number of these "hazy" moments has decreased dramatically as I've grown (I'm 23 now) It's one of those things he'll have to sort out on his own.



malya2006
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10 Sep 2009, 6:38 am

thank you for all your responses. i thought maybe it was something i was doing or could be doing to help. i guess not but at least that answered my question. thanks again



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10 Sep 2009, 1:44 pm

I have them to but not due to being on the spectrum. I'm epileptic and it's a type of seizure. When I was a kid they would yell at me for "spacing out" at school I've never had any control over that I don't even know whats going on around me at the time or that I've lost a few minutes of time. I have noticed the more stressed I'm the more it happends and yoga helps a great deal with this. If you son is willing to try yoga or some deep breathing to lower his stress level it should help. I've noticed with my son he's better able to deal when his stress levels are lower with jake going to the park to swing it the best thing for his mood.



schleppenheimer
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10 Sep 2009, 3:38 pm

thanks to all who have talked about this subject. my son has this spaciness problem, and it can really be frustrating to him AND to us as his parents. We want to be patient, but when it's midnight and he has lots of homework and his spacing out is making the homework take FOREVER, it's hard to be patient. Other nights, the homework can go relatively quickly, and there's less spaciness. I wish I new what causes it and how we could prevent it, but for now I will be happy to know that there's a chance that it will diminish as he matures. Thank you.



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20 Sep 2009, 12:33 am

We've experienced this spaciness with my 14 yr old son, and it does seem to get in the way of accomplishing tasks and being independent. We've come to accept it for the most part, but it can be very frustrating because there are just times in life when you have to focus.

I've often wondered about this. Thanks for the post, a very informative thread.



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20 Sep 2009, 6:00 am

I used to get spaced out almost to the point of being catatonic. It turns out it was wheat gluten causing the spaciness. It's worth looking into because it made all the difference in the world cutting out the gluten.


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malya2006
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20 Sep 2009, 10:53 pm

Metal Man,

How did you find out you were allergic to gluten? I've always been interested in going CF/GF with my son but it's really hard because he has a limited diet. Almost everything he eats has milk and wheat in it. Please tell me how and why you decided to be GF and how long it took for you to notice a difference. Btw my son doesn't really have any digestive issues that I know of. His bowels are normal and that's why I never really looked towards the diet, but if it helps him concentrate I will do anything.



Metal_Man
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21 Sep 2009, 7:54 am

I found out when I was 36 and already half-past dead. I had to figure it out for myself because the tests are very inaccurate and doctors don't like to diagnose food intolerances or allergies. The reason for this is they can't write lots of prescriptions which is how they make their money. Check out the website: www.celiac.com for all kinds of great info. Lots of parents with kids who have gluten problems are on the forum there.

I had relatively few gut problems, just really severe spaciness or brain fog as it is more commonly referred to. It took me a good two years to fully get healthy but I noticed a difference within a week of eliminating gluten. Soy is also a problem for me but not as severe as gluten. I've never had any issues with dairy.


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malya2006
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21 Sep 2009, 9:23 am

Thanks for the response and your personal experience. It is very insightful. I find this forum so much more helpful then the forum I go to for mother's with kids on the spectrum. We are going to go through all of this week's groceries and then start a brand new diet next week. I don't want to throw anything away and waste money. I have tried the GF/CF diet for about 3 weeks. He was doing well, the problem is he is always doing good and then doing bad, it's on and off so it's hard to determine whether it's the diet or just the inconsistencies of autism. When I tried the diet, I bought everything organic as well at a health food store. I spent over 200 dollars and got very little food. We'll just have to make a sacrifice and spend less on other things.

When my son was born I couldn't breast feed him because he had a problem latching on. Being exhausted and afraid he would starve I gave up and gave him formula. He began to be constipated so we switch to soy. It didn't work and finally he began to bleed from the intestines. We had to a formula with no traces of milk what so ever and he stopped bleeding immediately. The pediatrician told us that he is fine now and he outgrew the milk allergy. I am going to go CF as well just in case.



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21 Sep 2009, 11:12 am

Hello malya

You probably dont need to spend large amounts of money in order to try out the GFCF diet. Organic health foods may sound better for you, but in reality they are grown in dirt just the same as regular plants. The only difference is that they dont use fertilizer or pesticides, so your organic food is smaller, and you lose more to pests. I am not sure, but apparently that is more desirable then using technology to get better products :? .

If you want to try the GFCF diet, all you need is just to try some different recipes. Instead of using noodles or bread, just use rice, or potatoes for your starch. And just get some juice, like Orange juice, apple juice, etc. to drink instead of the milk. No need to break the bank.



Metal_Man
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21 Sep 2009, 3:02 pm

Don't waste your money on processed gluten free foods. Stick to the basics like meat, fruit and veggies. The only dairy I eat is cheese, yogurt and some occasional ice cream. It's a lot cheaper and healthier when you just go with the basics. Most of the processed gluten free foods are loaded with sugar and bad carbs. The organic stuff is another big waste of money too. The only processed stuff I buy is some gluten free bread from Trader Joe's. Going gluten free is a lot easier and cheaper than you might think if you do it right.


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DenvrDave
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22 Sep 2009, 6:18 pm

I have a related question on the topic of spaciness, specifically for Aspies:

Is spaciness something that you can control? In other words, can you go spacy at will? Or is this just something that happens beyond your control? The reason I am asking is because of my son, 14 yr old Aspie, who I think has this ability to enter a kind of fantasy-world inside his head...its a very imaginitive and creative space, and I think its a beautiful thing. This is what happens to him when I perceive he is being spacy...its part of his personality and I love him for it. The issue is that sometimes he gets spacy at the wrong time, like when he is supposed to be paying attention in class, or when crossing the street. Is it possible to teach him strategies to control WHEN spaciness happens, or if this cannot be controlled, are there any strategies he can use to survive once the spaciness occurs? Thanks.



malya2006
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22 Sep 2009, 11:39 pm

Thanks a lot Tracker and Metal Man, I guess it's the OCD in me that thinks once I go healthy, I have to do it all the way. Buy all organic and meets that have no hormones. You're absolutely right though, it's the processed Gluten Free foods and organics that made me go over 200.00. I will stick to the basics like you said and spend more time in the kitchen. After all, he won't starve himself, I hope. It's a pity I'm such a bad cook, no better time to learn than now. :wink: