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Aimless
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28 Sep 2009, 5:17 am

you seem because of difficulties with communication? I don't mean non verbal. I mean you can't find the right words or you can't put the words into something cogent.



Tim_Tex
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28 Sep 2009, 5:20 am

I don't have that issue.


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leejosepho
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28 Sep 2009, 5:48 am

Aimless wrote:
you seem because of difficulties with communication? I don't mean non verbal. I mean you can't find the right words or you can't put the words into something cogent.


Yes, I believe so ... kind of like knowledge, wisdom and insight that cannot come out?


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wildgrape
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28 Sep 2009, 6:44 am

I am a very abstract/conceptual thinker, and must spend time translating my thoughts into words in order to express them. This is not a particularly pleasant excercise and can be somewhat trying.

It seems that many (most?) mathematically oriented people experience this to some degree. I think it is akin to the brilliant professors who have difficulty giving comprehensible lectures. They need to turn to the blackboard and write formulae or graphs to express their complex thoughts. I don't see why AS people who think primarily in pictures would not have the same difficulty.

Verbal thinkers definitely have an advantage on boards such as this, and it would be reasonable to assume that they are over-represented in membership stats.



Murasame
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28 Sep 2009, 7:19 am

I have this problem. If I'm talking to someone I know the point I need to make, the tone I want to deliver it in, the exact words I'm going to use and in my mind I can visualise myself saying it.

But when it comes to actually doing so my brain somehow disengages and instead of delivering a clear, confident statement I usually just end up mumbling something incoherent or incomplete. This makes it look like I haven't got a clue what I'm talking about, even though I often know more about the subject than the person I'm speaking to.



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28 Sep 2009, 8:56 am

I think it's the opposite. People look at me and think I look smart because I wear glasses and am quiet but the truth is I'm not that smart. My grades are average and I have a learning disability in mathematics.



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28 Sep 2009, 12:35 pm

Definitely. People have expressed shock when they have read my writing, having only seen me communicate (or not) verbally. One was so taken aback (a university lecturer) he exclaimed that he had not known I was capable of coherent thoughts. It puts me at a massive disadvantage.



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28 Sep 2009, 1:30 pm

Murasame wrote:
I have this problem. If I'm talking to someone I know the point I need to make, the tone I want to deliver it in, the exact words I'm going to use and in my mind I can visualise myself saying it.

But when it comes to actually doing so my brain somehow disengages and instead of delivering a clear, confident statement I usually just end up mumbling something incoherent or incomplete. This makes it look like I haven't got a clue what I'm talking about, even though I often know more about the subject than the person I'm speaking to.

The story of my life...
Someone at my job said that I should throw my thoughts out more often, because they are pretty good most of the time.
But throwing the wrong thoughts or words out, is what makes me afraid.

I am getting better at it, but it still a problem.



ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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28 Sep 2009, 1:38 pm

Aimless wrote:
you seem because of difficulties with communication? I don't mean non verbal. I mean you can't find the right words or you can't put the words into something cogent.

Yes, definitely! Although I can read aloud exceptionally well, I have a difficult time talking to others. I can talk to them, but I am much better in writing or reading something I previously wrote. I don't really enjoy talking to people, unless it's on the phone. Then, it's a whole other story. On the phone, it's like I become another person, that's how noticeable the difference is.



Aimless
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28 Sep 2009, 3:14 pm

I wonder how much is attributed to anxiety about speaking out loud? Sometimes my mind goes completely blank when I'm trying to express something. I definitely write better than I speak but that's because I have time to stop and think and rewrite if I want. How do you test your level of ability in abstract thinking? It reminds me of my very ADHD nephew who understood higher concepts in math before he understood the mechanics of getting there.



ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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28 Sep 2009, 3:28 pm

For me, it's anxiety about their reactions and how they respond. I have been insulted so much by extremely rude people I have this aversion talking face to face and dread it. I find it really aggravating. Sometimes, I'm aware other people handle such situations with more grace than I. For some reason, I don't have that graceful way of handling situations. More often than not, if someone is rude, I will walk away right after hearing it and never speak to them again.



racooneyes
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28 Sep 2009, 3:57 pm

it comes and goes for me, sometimes the brain to mouth highway is clear and it's no problem other times it's gridlock and I stammer and trip over words as well as say things I immediately realise are garbage. When I feel it happening I try to shut up and do something to chill out asap


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Dilbert
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28 Sep 2009, 4:21 pm

No. I'm smart and everyone figures it out within like 30 seconds of meeting me.



wildgrape
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28 Sep 2009, 5:17 pm

Aimless wrote

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How do you test your level of ability in abstract thinking? It reminds me of my very ADHD nephew who understood higher concepts in math before he understood the mechanics of getting there.


Since I used the term, I will take a stab at answering your question even though I am not very knowledgeable on such topics. Off the top my head, I would say that if you can envisage complex and shapes and patterns and easily manipulate them in your mind you are capable of abstract thought, and perhaps quite proficient at it. I have been led to believe that many people find this difficult.

Bear in mind that I also speculated that AS folks who might not be math oriented but who think in pictures (like Temple Grandin) might also find expressing their thoughts in words challenging.

Your nephew was almost certainly using abstract thought and, in my view, although he might not have known how to explain in words the mechanics used to get there, in his mind he understood. An good example of the difficulty you raised in your original post.



am_suomi
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28 Sep 2009, 6:03 pm

Most likely!

When I have time to think about what I'm going to say, it's ok. For example, when sitting in class and thinking of question, if I asked one it was a very good one (most of the time I just sat silent).

However, when my boss comes into my office to ask for an update on a project or to ask a question, I sound like a blubbering fool, even if I know the answer. I just can't seem to get it out right. And then when trying to get it out I will mix up words, either out of order, or combine sounds from words and talking talking gibberish (I would say something like "galking tibberish" or I would do something like use the word sword instead of sound.)



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28 Sep 2009, 6:10 pm

am_suomi wrote:

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I just can't seem to get it out right. And then when trying to get it out I will mix up words, either out of order, or combine sounds from words and talking talking gibberish (I would say something like "galking tibberish" or I would do something like use the word sword instead of sound.)


I love spoonerisms-I wonder if the original Professor Spooner was Neurodivergent. Well, I guess I'm not the only one and it seems to be a matter of wiring. I wonder how that works. I wonder if it's like a milder version of what some experience with selective mutism.