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zeldapsychology
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01 Oct 2009, 8:00 am

In my life I've had people not speak up. For example I didn't find out until the suspension that A) The Psychology teacher didn't know how to answer my questions so she was avoiding me so she didn't have to answer my questions. and B) She felt I crossed the teacher student line and needed a Psychological Evaluation before returning on campus. I also later on upset a coworker and the boss pulled me in to talk about sexual harrassment. IMO why can't people just come to ME!?


The teacher issue could of been solved if I knew what Crossing the teacher/student line ment and if we would of just sat and talked about the issue one on one. So why do you think people don't approach you when they have issues with your behavior (and to think the teacher issue would of been easy to solve but alast now I'm depressed and haunted by it everyday such an easy fix go figure.) :-(



j0sh
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01 Oct 2009, 8:06 am

It could be because they are afraid of making a mistake, so they would rather have someone else handle it.



zena4
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01 Oct 2009, 8:17 am

It could be that but it also could be that they gave you clues but not evident for you, or not enough.
It could be that they did tell you but you didn't hear.

It could be that you frightened them, by what you said or by the expression on your face.

... It could be so many things.

It also can be that they simply were cowards and didn't dare to take the risk to upset you; it was easier to give you a suspension.



jessmc
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01 Oct 2009, 8:27 am

They assume that you are an NT and you would have automatically known better and so they treat you accordingly. As for your questions, they are unwilling to face adversity unless they have to. So make them. If you tell them about your differences, as a teacher or boss, they are required by law to learn about them and accomodate you.



zeldapsychology
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01 Oct 2009, 8:40 am

I think they did give me clues (more so the coworker than Psychology teacher IMO) and at times I didn't hear (I tend to tune people out) Is this an AS thing? (Obviously I'd think the not understanding clues (falls into Social Skills) and knowing how to behave right? Darn AS!! !! !! !! !!



01 Oct 2009, 10:52 am

Because they're cowards. People don't like confrontations or conflicts so they don't bother talking to you about it. I admit I am one too sometimes.



Prof_Pretorius
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01 Oct 2009, 11:05 am

zeldapsychology wrote:
I think they did give me clues (more so the coworker than Psychology teacher IMO) and at times I didn't hear (I tend to tune people out) Is this an AS thing? !


Yes, it is an AS thing. I was the victim of 'office politics' because I couldn't pick up on the clues.


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elderwanda
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01 Oct 2009, 11:16 am

Spokane_Girl wrote:
Because they're cowards. People don't like confrontations or conflicts so they don't bother talking to you about it. I admit I am one too sometimes.


I agree with this. Confrontations and conflict can be so hard to deal with. I don't even think it's an AS vs. NT thing, really. Some people are comfortable with confrontation, and some are very UNcomfortable with it (like myself).



01 Oct 2009, 11:22 am

Yea same here because I don't think they are going to give a s**t. I wouldn't tell a bully they have hurt me and all because bullies don't care and telling them is going to give them more power and they are going to know they can get to you that easily.
Jerks wouldn't care either so why bother you know?



racooneyes
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01 Oct 2009, 11:27 am

Doesn't make you a coward either just sensible. Why go around telling everyone what's wrong with them? Most people just want to get on with their own lives so will avoid the obvious problems in other people.


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zeldapsychology
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01 Oct 2009, 11:45 am

Prof_Pretorius wrote:
zeldapsychology wrote:
I think they did give me clues (more so the coworker than Psychology teacher IMO) and at times I didn't hear (I tend to tune people out) Is this an AS thing? !


Yes, it is an AS thing. I was the victim of 'office politics' because I couldn't pick up on the clues.




Thanks glad to know I'm not the only one. I know at first with school/job I'm basic do my work keep to myself it's when I open up and come out of my shell that I tend to have bad behavior but I don't want to be in a shell the rest of my life we'll see how the future goes hopefully I get a job soon I'll keep WP up to date LOL! (hopefully I can get back in College so my focus can be research papers NOT surfing WP all day LOL!)



01 Oct 2009, 3:26 pm

racooneyes wrote:
Doesn't make you a coward either just sensible. Why go around telling everyone what's wrong with them? Most people just want to get on with their own lives so will avoid the obvious problems in other people.



Well if someone had an issue with me or I did something that upset them so much and if it bothers them so much, I expect them to confront me about it and talk to me about than holding it against me and making me out to be the bad guy. That was my whole point in being a coward. But I can understand why they wouldn't come to me and say things to my face about what they think of me and all and what I did wrong to them because how are they supposed to know I am not one of those jerks? They just don't want to take that chance so they are better off talking behind my back and ranting about me to help them move on. If that bothered me so much they were doing that to me, I would come to them and ask what their problem is and see if our issue can be resolved because it could have been a misunderstanding.



TouchVanDerBoom
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01 Oct 2009, 3:39 pm

I can relate to the whole student/teacher line thing. I have always had a hard time recognising this. I wrote a love letter to one of my teachers once, she wasn't impressed. I also called my old singing teacher on his mobile and got an absolute telling off the next day. This sort of thing has happened many, many times. These days I keep my distance and don't say anything until I'm sure it will be appropriate. It's a shame because I have a really quirky, ballsy personality that doesn't see the light of day now because I'm too scared of overstepping my bounds.



zeldapsychology
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01 Oct 2009, 4:53 pm

TouchVanDerBoom wrote:
I can relate to the whole student/teacher line thing. I have always had a hard time recognising this. I wrote a love letter to one of my teachers once, she wasn't impressed. I also called my old singing teacher on his mobile and got an absolute telling off the next day. This sort of thing has happened many, many times. These days I keep my distance and don't say anything until I'm sure it will be appropriate. It's a shame because I have a really quirky, ballsy personality that doesn't see the light of day now because I'm too scared of overstepping my bounds.




OMG this accounts for me to a Tee!! !! I usually try to be cheerful and upbeat but I'm also too scared of overstepping boundaries as you put it. :-) Thanks alot!! :-)