Persecution complex
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18 Oct 2009, 5:27 am
TheHaywire wrote:
Here is the question though: how can we get rid of our persecution complexes when it seems like everything we say and do is persecuted?
Depends on how widely you define persecution. If you feel people are after you, specifically, it may help to think of most negative reactions like spam. When you go on the internet, someone is after you, but not after you personally. They are just after anyone to exploit, not after you personally. Most negative reactions to aspies are not personal in the same way. Most of the negative reactions you get are not even intentional spam.
Or perhaps you have become sensitive to negative reactions in general, the way people of ethnic minorities can become sensitive to racism because they have experienced so much of it. That biases their interpretation first of ambiguous situations. That bias makes prejudice seem even more common than it really is, and biases their interpretation some more. That is a destructive spiral. Do you think you are on your way to doing that?
I'm not sure what to do in that case. I would try to make a conscious correction for my bias, until the correction becomes automatic. That should also help reduce the incidence of negative reactions, because some proportion of those are self-fulfilling prophecies. Assume that people's reactions are negative, respond in kind, and you get more negative reactions than you would otherwise.
Not all reactions are like that. Some of the trouble comes from most people either misinterpreting aspies or not feeling comfortable in their company.
I once saw a post on WP recommending acting classes. Apparently learning how to express emotions makes you more aware of how others express them. Armed with that skill you can then learn not to trigger negative reactions. That's the theory. I haven't tried it myself.
That is all severely unprofessional advice. A competent professional should be able to do a lot better.
Mysty wrote:
The way I see it, there are, roughly, 3 types of people, as far as this goes. Those who do persecute, harrass, mock, etc, us. (I mean us individually, as in, a person like this mocking an aspie or aspie-ish person he/she encounters.) Those who aren't interested in friendship, or who don't understand, and don't try to, but don't actively try to make trouble for us. And those who are caring, and really do try to understand.
That reminded me of something I read recently on some science site. Can't remember where, but Wikipedia comes to the rescue: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_dominance_orientation. The social climbers get off on dominating others, and aspies are generally easy targets. You'd have more of those people after you than the average person.
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