ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo wrote:
KevinLA wrote:
It is also acceptable to be a jerk or weirdo, but not a loner.
Does this not make sense to anyone besides me?
It's not acceptable to pathologize solitary people. Forensic psychologists do it and the media quotes them. I don't understand where the psychologists are coming from. The vast majority of people displaying criminal behaviour are well liked, what people call "sociopathic" and some can get away with their behaviour for years and years because everyone loves them so much, they are in high positions of power, they have money, they are married with families.
Most people are not loners. If loners were the only criminals, there wouldn't be much crime, would there? Sociability or lack of it has little to do with criminal behaviour.
This was a huge issue with an old psychologist back when I wasn't diagnosed for aspergers but obviously had "something wrong with me" back in sixth grade. This woman was obsessive in her desire to force me to have friends and socialize. Looking back I wasn't developmentally ready to have multiple friends and when I was pushed into social situations it ended up making my alienation much worse.
I think the kind of thinking that says loners so dangerous is what makes so many therapists push kids into making friends even if they aren't ready for it or don't desire more than a few close friendships. They want to prevent the "lone gunman" type scenario.
Interestingly enough usually the worst types of atrocities among the school aged (school shootings, rapes, animal mutilation, and what not) along with normal bullying and ostracizing are usually performed by groups rather than "loners".
Personally as a loner and a "creep" as I've been called a few times (apparently speaking very little, not having a girlfriend, and wearing black are the primary requirements) I find the tendency of people to cluster into groups and surrender their individuality either to a stronger individual, a political movement, or a religion as far more frightening than someone who likes to be left alone.
