my anxiety towards social interactions is getting worse

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mr17orange
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26 Nov 2009, 6:48 pm

When I was in college I was constantly around other students. Now that I have my own house I find myself becoming more and more of a recluse.

I'm not trying to be, I just don't like well....you know..

How can I overcome this?...I feel like the only time i'll force myself out is to not seem any weirder than I already am.



superboyian
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26 Nov 2009, 7:22 pm

Have you tried calling someone that your close to since you managed to get your own place, maybe that might help?

Plus the fact that you have been living on your own on top of that and hardly had anyone to talk to.
Maybe it could be that?


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sgrannel
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26 Nov 2009, 9:07 pm

I don't know how you can overcome this, but I really do know what the experience is like. After I had roommates who either tolerated me or had some grievance I lived alone for a few years, and my desire/ability to socialize went downhill. Now I feel out of place being at the university because the students are outside my age group.


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CTBill
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26 Nov 2009, 9:13 pm

I've been living alone for the past 14 years, and can't fathom living with other people again ever.

I'll leave the house and interact with people, but only when I want to.

Life is good now that it is mostly on *my* terms.



BoringAaron
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26 Nov 2009, 10:21 pm

Did you ever try removing yourself from social situations? I like to pretend I'm acting, which is easier than thinking I'm really talking to real people, which makes it easier. Sometimes I pretend my body is a giant machine, and I'm just a little guy inside operating the controls, like the alien from Men in Black who lived inside the human-shaped robot :

Image

The picture only makes sense if you saw the movie. If not, think about Voltron. Or whatever the modern version of voltron is for the younger kids these days.

This shouldn't a permanent solution, but a crutch. It's a way to deal with being around other people until you become more comfortable with other people. Get into your character and go out and try interacting with people. Even if you really don't want to, try just being outside around them, because it's the only way to get good at it.



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26 Nov 2009, 10:27 pm

"If you don't use it, you lose it." It's definitely true for socialization.



Callista
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27 Nov 2009, 2:05 am

You've got to find a social outlet that's as safe and comfortable for you as possible, maybe based on a common interest or in a regulated/structured environment. Social phobia is like any other phobia in that it decreases with exposure to the object of fear, a process that works best when the exposure is small and easy to handle. You might also try volunteering somewhere, which generally involves some socializing, and has the extra benefit of letting you make a (usually small) difference.


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