Aspies who really don't want to get married

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or enter a similar committed relationship... at least for the foreseeable future--

at what age did you start to feel left behind by your peers in that regard? In other words, was there a point at which most your age seemed either married, or at least open to the possibility of such an arrangement, and you felt they were coming into their relationships with a very different outlook? Or was there always (since adulthood) a mix of people in your peer group who were already engaged or married and some who were totally not ready? I'm also wondering if the experiences of men and women are different in this regard.

As a kid I wanted to grow up and get married but by the time I reached adulthood I realized how pointless it is. Why marry if you two can just stay together?

But then I meet my husband and I told him marriage was useless but he told me I get a tax break and that's when I had second thoughts.

I started to get left behind in peers starting at age ten. Kids interests changed and they got into social interactions and I found that all difficult. They were all in a rush to grow up and I started to get pushed away. That's when I started saying I wish I could trade my brain for a normal brain and started to ask why am I so different and what's wrong with me. Before, I just didn't care despite knowing I'm different. But now as an adult, I don't feel so different.

I don't want to get married, and I never did. If I was married, I wouldn't be able to enjoy my freedom and pursue my unusual special interests.

Almost everyone in my family (mom, dad, uncle, aunt, sister, step-brother) have been divorced (oh, my cousin) and all of their divorces were ugly and generally for stupid reasons. After seeing their experiences, despite how much in love they claim to have been in when getting married, I have no desire to do so.

I personally would love to get married. It's my desire to not subsequently have kids that trips me up, or at least did the last time I came close to getting into a relationship.

I'd like to settle down and get married some time in the future. Would like kids too. I'm just not sure I could deal with the broken sleep.

I don't think the whole 'marriage and kids' package is meant for the likes of me to be honest. Any man I've been with has never wanted these things with me, so maybe I'm just not what people consider to be marriage material. This idea used to hurt me deeply, and it has left it's mark, but I have gotten used to this idea. Plus the idea of having these things is a little scary for me. A lot of effort goes into maintaining a marriage, particularly if there are children involved. I'm not the most clued up person when it comes to relationships. I know how to love someone, but not how to express it. Nor am I able to tell if someone is truly happy with me or not. I think it's this cluelessness on my part that contributes to the reason why no-one seems to want to commit to me in this way. I now no longer expect it. I'm currently with someone who, again, doesn't want to marry me or have children, but then he has not wanted these things with anyone else either, so it's not exclusive to me. I'm not settling with him, I do genuinely love him. Plus I suppose it's easier that he does not want these things as he is then going to have very little expectations of me that those who want to marry have of their partner.

Meh, marriage. Besides my personal feelings against the term because of it's religious origins and connotations, I don't see a point. If you and a partner get along as significant others, why do you need some giant ceremony and a TON of extra crap to do when you can just continue your relationship as is? In addition if things ever do sour, then there cannot be legal repercussions.

Besides the tax break, which I don't know how uniform that is out of the US, I just don't see a point. I mean, why is it so hard to say "I love her, she loves me, we're bonded and it's no different except that you spent money (possibly a ton of it for a large wedding ceremony) for a license so it says it on paper?"

i'm a 25 yr. old virgin, and only had a month long relationship. the way i see it marriage is bulls#!t. for me, it's some form of degradation & slavery towards women and the divorce rate is high. weddings are expensive, white dresses are ugly, having children is such a pain in the ass, being a housewife, the husband is never home, relying on the husband for money, no freedom, etc. all the reasons why i refuse to marry and then some.

I don't want to get married not because I don't want a family and kids.. I don't want to risk dealing with a potentially dishonest wife who screws you over by taking 1/2 of your assets upon divorce..

Think of all the whores you can f*ck with the money she takes away from you..

Yeh, marriage is something I really really don't want. I'm fiercely independent, and I think I would feel caged in a committed relationship like that. Plus people and relationships are stupendously complex for me.

Though I get annoyed when people say that feeling will change with age.

I never felt left behind by my ers, of course technically they really wernt my peers

I can see myself getting married in my 30s/40s/50s...where the woman is past the age where she wants kids...and if she does have kids from a previous marriage or relationship, they're all grown up and out of the picture. I can barely handle my own life, and hate kids to begin with. When people go gaga over babies, I think to myself "Why not just get a cute dog?"

I'm also misanthropic, and would do everything to make sure my son or daughter didn't become a tool. And you guys no my anti-man stance on here...if I had guys going after my daughter for sex, they wouldn't be alive lol.

So yeah, no kids for me.

When I got my diagnosis at age 30, I was relieved, because I then knew why I couldn't get friends and that I didn't need a girlfriend. I prefer my own fantasy world.

I would love to get married. I have been in two relationships and a FWB situation, but I would really love to be married.