tektek wrote:
if i may interject...
Certainly!
tektek wrote:
you realised your priorities ...
Yes, I wanted to live ...
tektek wrote:
and your faith in yourself ...
I had none of that whatsoever. I had failed completely at life, and I knew there was absolutely nothing I could do for myself. That is my actual and personal experience, and here is one way that is expressed in "A.A.", the book:
"... my friend sat before me, and he made the point-blank declaration that God had done for him what he could not do for himself. His human will had failed. Doctors had pronounced him incurable. Society was about to lock him up. Like myself, he had admitted complete defeat. Then he had, in effect, been raised from the dead, suddenly taken from the scrap heap to a level of life better than the best he had ever known!
"Had this power originated in him? Obviously it had not. There had been no more power in him than there was in me at that minute; and this was none at all." (page 11)
tektek wrote:
... and support from other people.
That is some jargon from today's A.A., not the original.
tektek wrote:
... you re-evaluated yourself, found that you wanted to change ...
I was willing *to be* changed ...
"To get over drinking will require a transformation of thought and attitude." (page 143)
Then I took the Steps (which included re-evaluating myself as powerless at Step One) in order for an actual change to take place.
tektek wrote:
... and you did change because you are a capable and responsible human being.
I greatly respect and appreciate your thought there, but that is not what happened. When I first got sober, I could not have poured piss from my boot even if you had told me the instructions were on the bottom.
tektek wrote:
i see no magic or miracles involved here ...
Definitely no magic, but definitely this:
"We, who have recovered from serious drinking, are miracles of mental health." (page 133)
_________________
I began looking for someone like me when I was five ...
My search ended at 59 ... right here on WrongPlanet.
==================================