Ugggh.. he flunked out of college. Is it worth petitioning?

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So, my 20 yo Aspy son got his official letter of dismissal from his college today. No big surprise. He's had three semesters of dismal grades and seems unable to process the fact that if you do things the same way, you will get the same result.

There is a case for petitioning.

1. He did not receive supportive services during his first year. And did slightly better his second year when he had the services.

He was told to. But, didn't bother until I walked him to the disability services office and talked to the advocate on his behalf.
But, he didn't make full use of the services offered.

2. He was dealing with a possible COPD diagnosis which turned out to be asthma.

3. He is finally willing to change his major.


But, he'll likely do the same thing in the same way. He refuses to admit that there is anything wrong with how he does things. "I do study." "I do my homework." "I am not always on the computer."
Yeah, than why is a smart guy like you still not passing physics?

However, if he is home he will drive me nutty. He will put things in the wrong places. He will leave razors and cleaning supplies out and pose a potential danger to his little sisters. He will sit in his room with his "toys" acting like he is a child with no responsibilities. He won't do anything to work towards the future. And he'll have loans to pay back in 6 months.

Any suggestions?

Maybe he didn't want to be there, in the first place.

Well, he says he did.

I recommend looking for a different school. Sometimes it just isn't a match. For AS kids, match can be very important, and fresh starts can make a real difference.

Have you thought of

Athabasca University

They offer full degrees, fully accredited, totally on-line. They transfer credits where it's possible. You work one-on-one with the grad student who is supervised by professor, and you can talk to professor any time you like.

I've been so very relieved at this convenient way of working! I had to pass it on to you, it might be compatible with your son.

Best of luck!

Red Deer College has transferable programs and it is smaller.I find it not too bad. The instructors know their students and if he has any issues, they will be very accomodating.

Your son in this particular sentence sounds a lot like me. I left college this past winter after dismal grades as well.
I'm now in Community College working towards an Architecture degree. So far I'm out of the cycle but I'm taking available and required courses as a beginner so I'd get a headstart when the cycle begins. After I graduate I plan to return to college and finish up what I started.

From the way you describe your son's activities in the house, (don't get me wrong) could it be possible that transitioning from school to college was too fast and too much of a change he could not handle? That's how I ended up.

I say yes to things all the time because I feel like I have to. Could be why he said he wanted to be there. One thing though, your not going to make any headway with him if you don't really try to see things from his perspective. We just think differently and while the world doesnt have to accept that, parents do.

Also full time college is a lot to handle sometimes. Maybe petition and go part time for a while.

Last edited by barbedlotus on 19 Jan 2010, 1:56 pm, edited 1 time in total.

College is not for everyone at all times in their lives. It doesn't sound like your son is particularly motivated to engage college, and so in your place, I would wonder if a petition would end up benefiting him. What good does it do to petition, and then find him flunking out again. This is not a problem unique to students with AS. I had similar problems in college, though I was able to stay afloat long enough to graduate. I then spent three years paying my own bills, and quickly became convinced that working hard in grad school was a worthwhile endeavor.

Prehaps, college is not appropriate for your son. Have you considered vocational job training instead? Does he like working with his hands rather than reading and studying all the intellectual, often abstract "stuff" that colleges and universities require?

Oftentimes, it can be easier to find a job when a person has the skills of an auto mechanic, carpentry, masonry, landscape design and grounds keeper, welding, airplane mechanic, plumbing, Electrician and many other types of Trades...while thousands of people with college and other advanced degrees remain unemployed. This is quite evident by our current economy.

Or prehaps your son just needs to take one year, or two, off from any college studies and work in a minimum paying job for a while. After being in school since the age of kindergarten, maybe he just needs a "break" and to experience the real world. Then, he will soon realize how important an education is to a better lifestyle and he will be more willing to work hard at doing his best to succeed in college.