Why is it so hard for NT's to comprehend special intrests?

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Speaking as someone who is a little bit AS and a little bit NT (I suppose), as well as the mother of an AS kid:

What I don't understand is the aspie need to focus on the special interest to the exclusion of all else. It's fine if you love [aircraft landing gear, Teletubbies, Ancient Greece,...], but if you seem incapable of enjoying anything else, then it gets annoying.

We've got all kinds of things we'd like to do with our son, but he has no patience for anything that isn't his special interest. We try to do something like go to the beach or take a tour of a candy factory, or any number of things, and he gets worn out and depressed after five minutes because he's not doing something related to the special interest. It's made it so that we feel trapped in our own home. We can't go out and do anything...or play board games at home, or other activities, without him getting all stressed out. He needs to be at home making a Warcraft custom level, and can't tolerate anything else. He wants other family members to join him, and gets upset if they don't.

I've got a few very strong interests. I have phases when I'm so interested in a particular topic that it's a struggle to break away from it, and I stay up to late working on it, thinking about it, or reading about it. But I've never felt any need to follow people around while they're trying to work on their own thing, talking about my interest.

I understand that AS people need their special interests (if they have them; not a requirement for dx). But I also understand that other people don't want to hear about the same topic over and over and over again. I like the fact that my son is so interested in making Warcraft maps. He's learning some good stuff about the basics of programming, and being very creative. It's been good for him. But I get so tired of having to hear about the little details that mean nothing to me--and having to hear about them when I was hoping to just enjoy some peace and quiet. I also get tired of him trying to force his brother to do Warcraft III stuff all day.

So, that's my 2 cents.

As to why I dedicate so much time and focus on one area while neglecting others I do not know what to say except that interest enraptures me, it brings me some kind of infinite joy I guess. It is one of those things for myself that is very hard to bring to words. The words I have used previously barely (if at all) encapsulate my feelings of the why. As to talking about my interest with others? I mostly did that when I was younger, I could not understand why what I felt from it/them could not bring the wonder it did for me to the other. It is still hard for me to understand hardly anyone else out their can feel what I do from my interests, but as I have gotten older I can control my need to share/express it with others. Do not get me wrong I still slip at times if I am talking about quantum mechanics or particular geometries, I will start to babble on until I catch myself. I don't know if I have helped you at all with your son by explaining myself, I believe you will come to an understanding with your child either over time in general, or if another Aspie or NT can give you better coping/learning advice.

I genuinely have no idea why being obsessed with Simon Cowell's Talentless Reject Show (popularly known as the "X Factor") is okay and indeed actively, but having any knowledge of world finance, religion, morality, science, pre-Cowell music, Eastern European or South American football, literature, war, or lists of my own obsessions, makes me a "freak who cares about only one thing".

I am SO tired of the (few) people on this forum who act as though they (and they're interests) are superior to NTs. Sometimes this forum takes on a real "us versus them" mentality that feels like reverse discrimination. Guess what? Many of us NTs are also crazy smart and have passionate interests in a vast range of interesting, esoteric topics. Some of us are not obsessed with talent shows, celebrities, sports or socializing...none of my NT friends are interested in any of those things either...that's why they are my friends...common interests.

Whether you have autism or not, people want to talk about/do things that interest them. Why should *your* interests, take precedence over mine?

Let's say your special interest is bee keeping. How would you like to live with someone who doesn't care at all about bee keeping but feels passionately about Sponge Bob Square Pants. What if that person expected you to listen to them talk about Sponge Bob all day and night and never bothered to ask you anything about bee keeping? How enjoyable would that be for you?

AS or NT, relationships take give AND take. If you want to act like you're the center of the universe don't be surprised when other people get tired of having you around.

This isn't reverse discrimination, it's still discrimination. That's like saying positive discrimination, which doesn't exist. But you're right. There should probably be either another word for people who do like talent shows, celebrities, sports or socializing or there should be more tolerance/acceptance towards other people. I would, however, have no idea how it would feel because I'm not a beekeeper and I like Spongebob Squarepants but don't know anyone who goes into lenghty monologues about it. Therefore, I cannot guage my response or feelings in such a situation.

I have an NT friend that is into bikes, and I got him into cameras. Some of my other NT friends don't have many hobbies besides hanging out with people, getting drunk, and going to see live music. Although recently I found out one likes science and fantasy books.

A special interest is like a song that gets stuck in your head. Except that it wont come out and it keeps playing and playing until years or it never exits. And you can really only have a few songs playing at most. Just saying if thats all they talk about then that one song is all thats in there.