Have you ever been accused of being a paedophile?

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Keeno
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27 Jan 2010, 8:51 am

As we all know men, in particular, are at risk of being accused of this if they are chronically single, and seen to be never in long-lasting and stable relationships with partners, especially the older they get past average marrying age. If you have ever been accused of being a paedophile, what have been your coping strategies/mechanisms afterwards?



luvntiedye
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27 Jan 2010, 9:37 am

My husband, an odd, shy sort, was single until I came along. We married on his 36th birthday. It's been 5 wonderful years, and I, an Aspie myself, feel like I've found an unspeakable treasure. In the years he lived in this little house alone, he was accused of being a pedophile, homosexual, and even a serial killer, if you can believe that one. People are idiots and will say all kinds of stupid things that pop into their ignorant little pea-brains. My husband told me that he never responded to that rubbish, because it wasn't worthy of a response. He knew it wasn't true and that was good enough. If someone is rude enough to say a thing like that, then they will never understand about you. That's because they don't care about you and therefore have no feelings where you are concerned. My advice? Forget those morons and focus on those who know you for real and accept you for who you are.


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jimybhoy
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27 Jan 2010, 10:02 am

Hi keeno

i am 27 from glasgow and i have been accused of being a peadophile, a rapist, a psycho, a beast just because i keep myself to myself normally coz im scared of what people think of me. Also i have met a few women who have probably been borderline personality who have ruined me or tried too. I have only had 1 serious girlfiend my whole life when i was 19 and it seems people think that justifys me being all these nasty things. i feel your pain mate i used to just think it was a scottish mentality thing.



sinsboldly
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27 Jan 2010, 10:04 am

Keeno wrote:
As we all know men, in particular, are at risk of being accused of this if they are chronically single, and seen to be never in long-lasting and stable relationships with partners, especially the older they get past average marrying age. If you have ever been accused of being a paedophile, what have been your coping strategies/mechanisms afterwards?


usually people need proof for any accusation to be an actionable offense.


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Keeno
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27 Jan 2010, 12:34 pm

luvntiedye: I can believe the ignorance is such that your husband had to go through that. As much as these sorts of allegations are untrue it's an underestimated concern generally, one that needs to be taken more seriously, that some people are in serious misplaced danger because of paedophile hysteria and vigilanteism.

jimybhoy: I'm really sorry to hear of what you have had to go through. You've evidently realised it's not just the Scottish mentality. Other western countries (if not others) have the problem too.

For example, what about America? I toured the US relatively recently and felt a lot more uncomfortable there in general. While there I got the impression I'd be a lot more vulnerable in the US (in general) than in Scotland (in general) to people who take out child abuse issues (as well as issues to do with abuse of women). Also, programmes like "To Catch a Predator" are big in the US.

sinsboldly: Absolutely correct, and I'm sure the vast majority of us have absolutely nothing to fear as regards the law. That's not my concern though, my concern is people being in more direct danger from people who feel they don't need evidence.



LittleTigger
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27 Jan 2010, 12:35 pm

Also realise that this is society's MOST FAVOURITE
THING TO ACCUSE someone of.

I was even called this whilst OUT WITH MY WIFE
playing in the park, on a rainy day, in the big mud puddle.

Tammy got mad and threw a mudball at the
old bag and so did I, the old bag's jaw dropped
in SHOCK. Tammy and me both blew a BIG LOUD
RASPBERRY at her and called her a big stupid
dirty old poopyhole RIGHT IN FRONT of
everyone, embarrassed the hell out of her,
and sent her red faced walking away in shame.

No one but Old Bag had any problem with
Tammy and me playing in the big mud puddle.

People love to accuse, they have nothing better
to do, and they think they are "DOING THEIR PART IN SOCIETY"
by bringing people down like this, they are actually
the most USELESS human rubbish out there
and I Officially Damn those publicly who accuse me
of ANYTHING that I did not do.

Or I just blow them a raspberry and call them
a dirty old poopyhole and stamp off.


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Peko
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27 Jan 2010, 1:28 pm

nope


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elderwanda
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28 Jan 2010, 1:21 pm

LittleTigger wrote:
Also realise that this is society's MOST FAVOURITE
THING TO ACCUSE someone of.

I was even called this whilst OUT WITH MY WIFE
playing in the park, on a rainy day, in the big mud puddle.

Tammy got mad and threw a mudball at the
old bag and so did I, the old bag's jaw dropped
in SHOCK. Tammy and me both blew a BIG LOUD
RASPBERRY at her and called her a big stupid
dirty old poopyhole RIGHT IN FRONT of
everyone, embarrassed the hell out of her,
and sent her red faced walking away in shame.

No one but Old Bag had any problem with
Tammy and me playing in the big mud puddle.

People love to accuse, they have nothing better
to do, and they think they are "DOING THEIR PART IN SOCIETY"
by bringing people down like this, they are actually
the most USELESS human rubbish out there
and I Officially Damn those publicly who accuse me
of ANYTHING that I did not do.

Or I just blow them a raspberry and call them
a dirty old poopyhole and stamp off.



Is that was they call "mudslinging"? :D

Your post made me smile.



Peko
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30 Jan 2010, 12:29 am

elderwanda wrote:
LittleTigger wrote:
Also realise that this is society's MOST FAVOURITE
THING TO ACCUSE someone of.

I was even called this whilst OUT WITH MY WIFE
playing in the park, on a rainy day, in the big mud puddle.

Tammy got mad and threw a mudball at the
old bag and so did I, the old bag's jaw dropped
in SHOCK. Tammy and me both blew a BIG LOUD
RASPBERRY at her and called her a big stupid
dirty old poopyhole RIGHT IN FRONT of
everyone, embarrassed the hell out of her,
and sent her red faced walking away in shame.

No one but Old Bag had any problem with
Tammy and me playing in the big mud puddle.

People love to accuse, they have nothing better
to do, and they think they are "DOING THEIR PART IN SOCIETY"
by bringing people down like this, they are actually
the most USELESS human rubbish out there
and I Officially Damn those publicly who accuse me
of ANYTHING that I did not do.

Or I just blow them a raspberry and call them
a dirty old poopyhole and stamp off.



Is that was they call "mudslinging"? :D

Your post made me smile.

:lol:
Elderwanda your right
Little Tigger, your brilliant


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All dependent upon your own perspective in your own form of existence, so trust your own gut and live the way YOU want/need to.


Miyah
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31 Jan 2010, 9:49 pm

Yes, as a woman, it did happen. Back in 2003, I was 21 and I made friends with a 14-year-old troubled boy in a church who reached out to me. He and I didn't do anything but stay in the church youth center and watch TV or eat snacks that he would bring. However, his mother and church freaked out and separated us, while I got accused of having a romantic relationship, and that was not the case. I felt like he was a little brother who looked out for me, but the one of the pastors said that I didn't need a little brother and to hang up the next time he tried to call me. They also added that if I continued to be his friend, the church would do nothing if I would have been thrown in jail.



Keeno
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07 Feb 2010, 7:51 pm

Miyah wrote:
Yes, as a woman, it did happen. Back in 2003, I was 21 and I made friends with a 14-year-old troubled boy in a church who reached out to me. He and I didn't do anything but stay in the church youth center and watch TV or eat snacks that he would bring. However, his mother and church freaked out and separated us, while I got accused of having a romantic relationship, and that was not the case. I felt like he was a little brother who looked out for me, but the one of the pastors said that I didn't need a little brother and to hang up the next time he tried to call me. They also added that if I continued to be his friend, the church would do nothing if I would have been thrown in jail.


That's very worrying. If a young lady like you is even getting accused, I guess people are really determined.



ScottF
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08 Feb 2010, 5:30 pm

I am 32, liva alone and yes, I have been accused of being a pedophile as well. I like women who are 18 and up, just like normal guys my age...


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Philologos
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09 Feb 2010, 12:26 am

One occasion - I would have been, if it had been a category in the public eye in the late 60s. Visiting, there was a girl of 3 or so, who, like some other youngsters of the type, found me more interesting and responsive than other adults. I found interacting with her more interesting than the very phatic NT talk going on with the other adults present, only one of whom I knew. My then significant person got very upset at me for finding the youngster more interesting to interact with than her uncle or whatever. But in those days nobody jumped to sexual explanations.



whilily
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27 Apr 2010, 3:22 am

In dormitory , I'm being accused as crazy, bad ,autism, revengeful, stupid,etc,etc...

And the last is lesbian and manipulator , just because I'm see them as little sister and wanted to help them from bullies.
But how I can resist not to help them if they are not come to me and called me as "big sister" and wanted me to see their dog anyway....:D



MoonRa
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01 May 2010, 6:03 am

When talking to children, I try to get to talk to their parents as well. Doing so, I prevent that parents and other people are making up their own minds about my intentions behind my back. I've never been accused of being a paedophile.

When being in a group of men, I sometimes look at woman just to prevent that the others think I'm gay (a lot of men appear to be homophobic). But still, a lot of people think or suspect I'm gay.

In fact, I consider myself asexual with a minor preferance for woman. However most people don't take that: you are either straight, gay, bi, pedo, in denial or whatever. To prevent that, I sometimes deliberately give away clue's such that I'm perceived a straight.



Moog
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01 May 2010, 1:09 pm

It did seem to be the accusation du jour for a while. Before that it was accusations of homosexuality. Being unemployed, I've not been in a position where people routinely sling nonsensical abuse at me. So that's nice.


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