Are you constantly aware of your autism/AS?

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I'm not aware of it unless I'm talking about it or something. Autism is an abstraction and I don't live my life in the land of abstractions. I just live my life. And never think in categories of any kind unless I am translating to words.

I am since Mar 19, 2010

I'm still getting back and forth of the whole hating it and coping with it phases. I don't know if anyone has ever experienced that feeling you got when you have had a really hard life and you feel like you have something to blame for it now. Even though you are really blaming yourself it's a bittersweet feeling. Bitter cause it runs your self-esteem down and sweet cause you get to vent your frustration on something, or am I just nuts? lol

not when i am on my own which is most of the time. i am just myself, have always been like this.
i am more aware of my asperger when i am out in a non familiar surroundings and with new people.

I find, that I'm very aware of my traits. I can feel myself forcing myself to give people eye contact. I hear the accent that I've never lost, when I'm talking to people. I even sound like Mick. That's unusual for someone who's lived in Southern British Columbia, for 30 years. There's always a Kinks song playing in my head, at any time, that was recorded, any of the years that Mick was with the group. I'm always bothered by bright light, of any kind. I also have bad memories from my past, that pop up, every time I see teens and young adults, of the Nt sheep herd variety. I still refuse to be cured of my autism. Now you see why I've decided to me honest and change the diagnosis, in my profile. It's HFA that I have, as opposed to AS.

Not really. Whenever I hear about families having to raise mentally disabled children, I feel like I'm an NT who's meant to feel extremely sympathetic and greatful that I'm not like that, even though I have Asperger's and qualify as having a different brain.

It's at least on the back of my mind quite a lot, which is useful, as awareness of it allows me to work around it. Before I was aware of it, it caused a lot of problems, and contributed to a major depressive episode/crash in my ability to function. I'm now in a similar situation to the one where I had the depression, but with better awareness of how to manage my brain.